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Huge Ethical Dilemma - Need Advice ASAP!
I?m having a really tough time with my current job situation. Unfortunately, I work a family member, who runs a nonprofit organization. Her salary was cut last year (from over $150,000 to $120s range). I have worked there for 5 years and am the one with the most seniority other than said family member. I make $32k a year (starting at $18k and the rest of the staff make between $22-$28k). Our total revenue is in the $700k range.
In pursing reinstatement of her former salary, my boss/family member has paid me to lie repeatedly about more things than I can even keep tabs on. For instance, she wrote a report explaining why she deserved such an enormous salary compared with everyone else?s, and had me lie to the entire board saying that an outside consultant did it. Now our outside consultant has been contacted to verify some of rather shady figures, and I?m thrown under the bus to the board as a liar. Naturally, my boss isn?t taking any credit. She has me lie about my salary, about her qualifications (I?m just waiting for an email requesting for me to make a fake college degree in photoshop..), where our money is spent, etc.
I absolutely hate going to work ? all of this lying is
absolutely killing me. It really kills me because so much that I?m being asked
to lie about relates to the financials (example: boss goes on vacation, charges
hotel to work account, then asks me to explain to accountant why it?s a
business expense). It kills me because I
have friends that blindly give their hard earned dollars to the organization. I
don?t want to lose my job and my family, so what do I do?
Re: Huge Ethical Dilemma - Need Advice ASAP!
You say that you have friends who gave money to this organization, and you have a board - if you are a charity, foundation, etc you may have actually committed a crime if you falsified official financial documents. I work for a foundation and at my company, what you've done would involve the police and the IRS.
First, I would delete this post. Second, I would talk to a lawyer about the implications of what you've done. Dependent on what the lawyer said, I'd go to the board and tell all, then try my best to get another job.
DS1 born June 2008 | m/c at 9w March 2011 | DS2 born April 2012
Ditto Vanilla. you may be in deeper than you realize.
You would lose "family" if you ... what? said no? Stood up to her? Refused to stop being unethical, and perhaps even lying?!
Who besides her would shun you if they knew the truth?
Is all this erally worth keeping someone in your life who has no regard for you at all?!
~Benjamin Franklin
DS dx with celiac disease 5/28/10
I would have gladly let this woman fire me in order to keep myself out of the moral, ethical, and legal mess you have found yourself in. Even if it was my own mother.
Ditto the pps on how you should proceed. You're in deep.
Our little Irish rose came to us on March 5, 2010
Don't drink the water.
Disclaimer: I am not an MD. Please don't PM me with pregnancy-related questions. Ask your doctor.
is this only an ethical dilemma for you now that they're verifying the info you lied about to justify your boss's salary?
ditto pps.
As a past consultant for a non-profit, I agree with PP. You lied about $$ that was probably part governmentally funded.
Take this post down, fess up to the board since it's not like your boss is planning on admitting she asked up to lie. Start looking for a new job and hope this doesn't bite you in the a$$. The faster you clear your name the quicker you can get outta there. If the board is already questioning the fees, you are in futher than you think.
And stop lying for you boss!
Ok, maybe I'm reading this wrong, so sorry if I'm misunderstanding. Did she pay you on top of your salary to lie? Are you saying you accepted a bribe on top of everything else? You should delete this post and talk to a lawyer asap. Depending on how the board chooses to pursue this, I think losing your job is the least of your worries.
Agree!!
OP, what ever made you think any of that was ethically right? How terrible.
Also Agree!
You "got thrown under the bus as a liar" because you lied. You are a liar, even if under pressure or after accepting a bribe (which is worse than being liar)
You shoul have thought about the long term conseqences of your potential actions before you did them, but since that ship has sailed, its best to do what you can to make it right and move foreward with a stronge ethical code.
I changed my name
Then I would have said, "Go ahead and fire me. And I'll be going to the board tomorrow morning to tell them that you wanted me to lie for you." My family at least would have admired the fact that I didn't allow other family members to commit fraud.
Please take the advice people have given you here.
Our little Irish rose came to us on March 5, 2010
Don't drink the water.
Disclaimer: I am not an MD. Please don't PM me with pregnancy-related questions. Ask your doctor.
I'm a CPA and a CFE so I do both tax work and forensic accounting work - from both stand points, this is NOT good. As a charitable organization there have been some serious violations as far as the IRS is concerned, according to your post...from a criminal stand point there have also been some serious violations.
I highly encourage you to speak with the board ASAP, probably after seeking advice from an attorney. While you haven't personally misappropriated any funds (I'm gathering from your post) you could probably be considered an accomplice, accessory, etc. depending on how things go. It will look a lot better if you go ahead and fess up ... As for the family members - yep, they'll probably turn on you but at least you'll have some dignity left.
As all PP's have said, the sooner you get this over with - the better off you'll be.
So, this family member is "forcing" you to do something that is illegal and could cause YOU major legal problems, along w/ losing your job, but YOU would be the one they turn against?
If this is really the case, then I have to question the character and morals of your family and why you'd even really want them in your life in the first place!
~Benjamin Franklin
DS dx with celiac disease 5/28/10
Yeah, I'd be really bummed if those fine, upstanding folks stopped talking to me.
Lawyer up. You're gonna need it.
Also, there's this thing called free will. Use it the next time someone asks you to lie for them.
Think about these words: Accomplice to fraud.
That's you. Lawyer up.
Bribe [noun]: anything given or serving to persuade or induce
It kind of sounds like she did bribe you based on what you said above, unless of course you would've lied regardless of if she paid you or asked you to, in which case you have no ethics.
I get that it sucks that your family might ditch you because of it, but which is worse: losing your family or going to prison? I know I wouldn't do well in prison, and I wouldn't want any of what you've done on my record, so I wouldn't have lied to begin with, but I also wouldn't have done it just so my family would smile at me. It sounds like your family isn't the best.
Ditto PP in getting a lawyer and DDing this thread. Though, I would LOVE to know who you work for.
Our little Irish rose came to us on March 5, 2010
Don't drink the water.
Disclaimer: I am not an MD. Please don't PM me with pregnancy-related questions. Ask your doctor.
I think that might be the new tactic. Keep us hooked by seeming real w/ one response.
~Benjamin Franklin
DS dx with celiac disease 5/28/10
really? People are telling you that you may have committed a crime, which you have described on a public message board, and they have suggested you take down this post. And your response is to laugh and say that you wish you could post where you work? You appear not to get it. At all.
really? People are telling you that you may have committed a crime, which you have described on a public message board, and they have suggested you take down this post. And your response is to laugh and say that you wish you could post where you work? You appear not to get it. At all.