August 2009 Weddings
cortneyloo
member
Dear Community,
Our tech team has launched updates to The Nest today. As a result of these updates, members of the Nest Community will need to change their password in order to continue participating in the community. In addition, The Nest community member's avatars will be replaced with generic default avatars. If you wish to revert to your original avatar, you will need to re-upload it via The Nest.
If you have questions about this, please email help@theknot.com.
Thank you.
Note: This only affects The Nest's community members and will not affect members on The Bump or The Knot.
Our tech team has launched updates to The Nest today. As a result of these updates, members of the Nest Community will need to change their password in order to continue participating in the community. In addition, The Nest community member's avatars will be replaced with generic default avatars. If you wish to revert to your original avatar, you will need to re-upload it via The Nest.
If you have questions about this, please email help@theknot.com.
Thank you.
Note: This only affects The Nest's community members and will not affect members on The Bump or The Knot.
M/C
I had a m/c today. I'm kind of in shock since I didn't know I was pregnant. I wasn't positive of what happened until I talked to my doctor about my symptoms and saw the evidence in the toilet (tmi I'm sorry). I don't really know how I feel right now so I thought I'd vent here instead of reaching out to my real life friends. I mean we weren't TTC and with us buying a house and trying to renovate it would have been so hard on us financially, but it still makes me sad and also worried. I mean what caused it and what does that mean for when we actually want to try to have a baby? I have to set up an appointment with my doctor now so that she can do an examination and hopefully I'll get my questions answered there 
Re: M/C
I'm sorry for your loss.
For what it's worth... my understanding is that most early miscarriages are quite random. They often happen by chance and don't necessarily indicate anything 'wrong' with the mother or father.
I'm no doctor so please don't take this as a medical opinion, just trying to say please don't worry too much for now until you go through your exam with the doctor. If it will help, you may want to google 'chemical pregnancy'.
Baby #2: Surprise BFP 9.19.12, EDD 5.24.13, natural m/c 10.19.13 at 9w
I'm so sorry to hear that. Even though you didn't know you were pregnant, to find out you were and had a loss on the same day must be difficult.
I also want to second what ringy said. Early miscarriages happen to many women, some who often didn't know they were pregnant and there isn't always a cause or reason. I hope your doctor is able to give you some reassurance in terms of your TTC future.
(((Hugs)))
Ditto everything ringy said. Don't psych yourself out.
We'll just not tell H about this little fact, m'kay?
First of all I'm very sorry for your loss. Make sure you go in to see your doctor to make sure it was a completely m/c, or you could get an infection.
Ringy is right, many miscarriages happen before women even know they're pregnant. Most go on to have perfectly healthy pregnancies. If anything good can come of this, at least you know you are able to get pregnant.
I'm so sorry
I also second pp who said to read up on/ask about chemical pregnancies, and also feel free to reach out to the Miscarriage board on the bump. I'm not active over there anymore, but the girls are great support system to one another.
BFP#1 11.2.10 | EDD 7.9.11 | HB 7w2d & 8w4d | missed M/C 11w2d | D&E 12.21.10
FSH at 14.5 - 4.21.11 | CCCT - (CD3 8.8,CD10 12.2)| dx w/ DOR @ 28 yrs old
IUI#1 + clomid 8.29.11 (our anniversary)
BFP#2 9.10.11 | EDD 5.21.12 | beta 1 @ 14dpi:232 | beta 2 @17dpi:703 | beta 3 @24dpi:7,174
Baby A HB of 142(7w), 161(8w), 164(9w) | Baby B no HB, Vanishing Twin
Oh my gosh, I'm sorry. I can only imagine that it has to be a very strange, confusing and upsetting thing to go through.
I know a lot of people find comfort in different places, but if you're like me and find it in knowing the scientific thought behind it, then maybe this'll make you feel... I dunno... comforted? I'm really wrestling with the whole TTC process and fear because (and I'm not exaggerating here at all), all of my IRL friends have gone through early m/c at some point on their paths toward motherhood (and I have craptacular family history). I was asking my doctor about early m/c on my last visit and she was telling me that ones like yours often happen because the body recognizes that the baby is missing some vital genetics that would allow it to live. She equated it (and this will sound much more nonchalant than is meant) to an evolutionary defence mechanism that has nothing to do with your ability to give birth or your husband's ability to procreate. Looking at it that way made me feel... not better but more understanding... of the process.
Regardless, I'm really sorry you're going through it.
Alyson & Phil | Planning Bio | Married Bio!
Dates & Quinces Blog
I'm so sorry. {{hugs}}
Ditto Ringy - don't stress about your future ability to conceive. I'm pretty sure this happened to me when I was younger, and I didn't really know what was going on at the time. And I have two healthy daughters now.
I am so sorry you are going through this!
I am so sorry for your loss. Even though you weren't TTC, the loss is still real and it's right to be sad and grieve.
The honest truth is that up to 20% of recognized pregnancies end in miscarriage. The number is even higher when you include cases of losses like yours and chemical pregnancies. There is nothing that you did or didn't do that caused it and from what I understand, most doctors aren't concerned unless it happens more than once. Your doctor will probably have you come a few times for blood work, just to make sure that your hormone levels are going back down, to make sure that the miscarriage was complete.
Again, I am so sorry this happened. You might want to pop over to the pregnancy loss board on the Bump. The ladies there are very supportive. I was over there for a few weeks after my m/c and it was helpful to know I wasn't the only one. {{hugs}}
The Daily Nugget
Cycle 12, IUI #1 - 33m post wash 10/15/10 = BFN
Cycle 13, IUI #2 - 15m post wash 11/16/10 = BFP, missed m/c, D&C 1/3/11
Cycle 15 - 18, IUI #3-6 = BFN
Cycle 20, IUI #7 = BFP!, missed m/c 9/14, D&C
DE-IVF Aug. 2012: ER 8/30 11R, 7M, 4F; ET 9/4 returned 2
Beta 9/18 #1-820, #2-1699, #3-7124
10/1 1st u/s measuring right on track, 125 bpm
I second what Kaesha said, I've been told this before as well. Also Ringy did say it right, this miscarriage doesn't mean there is anything wrong with you or your DH.
TTC since October 2010 | BFP 12/29/11 | RRQ BORN 08/26/12
planned | married | blogged
I can only imagine how confusing it would be. The girls on miscarriage/loss board are incredible, if you ever want to talk to them. However, we're here for you too. Just beacuse things I guess are worse, it doesn't mean it still wasn't a loss.
Keep us posted, and take care of yourself.