Sex & Romance
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Why is sex so painful for me?

    I've been married for 7 years and about a year ago my body started to go through some unusual changes. For one, I don't get my period anymore and this worries me because I'm only 27! I haven't had a period for 14 months when before I used to bleed quite heavily. I've been told I have Polycystic Ovarian Syndrome along with a fatty liver, diabetes, and high blood pressure. I know it's not good to have those things all at one time but I'm working on my weight. I have to lose about 40 pounds though, which will take awhile. So I'm on medication for all of those conditions but I still haven't gotten a period.

     Well now it seems like I can't even have sex because my vagina burns so bad. We tried using lube and it helps somewhat but I can still feel pain. This leads to frustration and no orgasm....I just lay there in pain. I feel terrible for my husband because it has gotten to the point where we have sex maybe once a month. At first I thought it was because we weren't having sex often enough but even when we have it as regularly as we used to it hurts. I don't bleed during sex, my vagina just burns from the penetration each and every single time we have sex. It doesn't "hurt" inside it just burns and becomes inflamed. This has been going on for the last year in a half. I don't have an STD, my last PAP was normal and there's never been any cheating. So the only thing I can think of is that I may have vaginal dryness or some kind of bacterial infection which is making sex a nightmare. Could not having a period as well as imbalanced hormones cause this? How can I get tested to see what is wrong? My doctor told me it may be because we are too "rough" but I know it's not the reason. We go rather slow because of the pain and usually only last until my husband reaches an orgasm which isn't long. So, what should I do to get a proper diagnosis if my doctor isn't taking me seriously? What could be causing this?

Re: Why is sex so painful for me?

  • I'm 28 and also need to lose weight and also don't get my period without meds, right now.  I'm diagnosed as hypothyroid and insulin resistant.  My doctor put me on Promera which while it doesn't cause you to ovulate, it does cause you to get your period.  You need to get to your Doc, because if you're not shedding the lining it puts you at a higher risk for uterine cancer and other problems. I don't know for sure but perhaps the fact that you have gone so long and may have such a large build up of the lining is what's causing your pain.

    And if you're unsure about your doc, go get a 2nd opinion and think about switching doctors.

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  • Change doctors NOW.  Your doctor is an idiot.

    You have been without a period for 14 months.  No OBGYN should have permitted that without a full hormone screening.  You could have thyroid problems or a pituitary tumor that could be throwing off your periods.  And those are just the easy things to diagnose!

    If your hormones are all wacky, you may experience vaginal dryness and sex will be painful.  Once you have everything sorted out, I can imagine that sex will get good again.  

    Good Luck! 

  • Ditto on what Daring Miss said! Get a new doctor asap because the one you have is either not knowledgeable enough to diagnose or is just plain lazy. It seems like they don't care enough to look deeper.
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  • i have the same problem :( its horrible cause it hurts for a day or two. I HATE it. I haven't been to the doctor, but I think its my BC. I don't wanna get off it b/c i HATE condoms (they hurt the most...i think its the latex of it making me dryer?) anyway. I dunno. If I get an answer, I will for sure let you know (my gyno is very sweet and will explain everything to the last detail)
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  • "Burning" does sound like dryness, pelvic floor muscle tightness, or infection (fyi, if your hormones shift, you can be more prone to infections in that area). Also, endometriosis can cause pain during intercourse and often goes undiagnosed for quite some time because it cannot be seen on an ultrasound. I hope you find answers asap!
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