Paternity Leave?

summerbride11 · March 2011

Did any of your DH/SO's use paternity leave through the FMLA? Do they plan to and for how long? I've been researching a bit, but it seems like this is frowned upon by employers, so many men don't end up using it. I saw a post on the May board but the laws vary by region. I was wondering what you ladies did or plan on doing?

Holler4dmb · March 2011

DH looked into it. It's a lot of paperwork and he also got the impression that it was frowned upon. We lucked out on the timing of C's birth though considering she was a surprise. DH was able to use his vacation time and only worked a day maybe two a week from Thanksgiving to the New Year. If she was born now we would have been screwed because it's tax season and he is working 65-70 hour weeks.

Bridezilla in Training · March 2011

My DH is using a week of paid vacation when our LO arrives. He started the job a little more than 6 months ago so although I wish he could take off more time, it's just not possible for us.

lisa5ny · March 2011

Luckily DH's job offers something called "family sick leave" which he was able to use when A was born to take 2 weeks off.

But, as someone who worked in HR for 10 years, I can say that it is definatly frowned upon, and most men just use vacation/personal/sick time if they want time off after thier wives have babies.

ali26 · March 2011

MH kind of had a leave but it was not through FMLA. He just worked it out privately with his boss. The week before K was born he took off, using vacation time. Then the week after she was born he used his remaning vacation from 2010 even though it was 2011 (it's not supposed to carry over). Then the remaining 3 weeks he worked from home. He went back to the office when K was about a month old, and he still has his 4 weeks of vacation time untouched to use throughout the year.

We are lucky he has such a flexible boss! He's done a lot of nice things for us throughout the years.

Jen&Louie · March 2011

Yes, DH used 3 weeks of FMLA. Although his employer wasn't thrilled he was legally entitled to take the time. ALso, the timing worked perfectly because he had already accepted an offer for another job and gave notice as soon as he returned from family leave.

sugardumpling · March 2011

my firm offers 1 week paid paternity leave and up to 26 weeks of unpaid time can be taken under FMLA. Most gentlemen that have taken paternity leave use 1 week paternity and piggy back vacation time to the birth/adoption of child.

Not sure if it is frowned upon as i have covered a few male attorneys that take the 1st month off of their child's lives.

Nikosmom · March 2011

In my work contract it specifically says that FMLA can be used for the birth of a child. I say if he is entitled to it, take some time. Just remember FMLA is usually an unpaid leave.

summerbride11 · March 2011

Thank you ladies. Unfortunately, it sucks that this is frowned upon and frankly kind of sexist. Our plan was: 1) for me to work up until I give birth, if I can make it! 2) I have 3 weeks sick time left that I HAVE to use before STD kicks in. 3) my 6 weeks STD (unpaid time, but using STD through the FMLA). 4) I was hoping he would take 6 weeks STD through the FMLA ...that he is entitle to! He is kind of iffy about it and just wants to use his two weeks vacation. Even if STD is only $170 per week, it's still money that we won't be spending on childcare AND quality time with our LO.

navybride06 · March 2011

DH didn't. But he has a flexible job so he took off 2 weeks and even when he works he work 1 day on 3 off. He had is vaca back up to his hospitalization which gave him a total of 2 months off paid back in the winter which was great for saving money and him spending with LO.

He'll do the same this time, 2 weeks off and then go back to his schedule. We are blessed with tons of family nearby and help.

nybride10 · March 2011

G plans on taking his family sick time. he gets 30 days next year but has to use it from his sick bank. its fine because he has banked over 80 days anyway. this is only if he is at the same school. if not. he'll just take a few days.

Paternity Leave?

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