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Moms - Infant Separation Anxiety? (long)
Maddy is NOT handling daycare well AT ALL. It's really bad. She won't take a bottle there, which is one thing, but now today she wouldn't even sleep in her crib at daycare. I know she's only like 4 days in but it's hard on daycare and it's hell on me b/c when she comes home she doesn't want to part from me at all. She's been crazy clingy to the point that I have to hide in the other room and cry for a few minutes b/c the stress and exhaustion is killing me. She won't even sit on the floor between my legs to play anymore - she wants to be ON me at all times.
We've had the same bedtime/naptime routine for months now, and she's been sleeping well for the past 2-3 months after a long road of sleep training. Tonight it took 2 hours to get her to bed because she was panicked when we let go of her. I nursed her to almost sleep like normal, laid her down, and the screaming began. 25 minutes later Jerred went in and rocked her for almost half an hour, and she only finally got quiet for the last 5-10 minutes. As soon as he put her down, the screaming resumed. I let it go another 25 minutes or so, then caved and went in and let her nurse again for a little bit, then rocked her. She just curled up on me and did not want me to let her go. I finally laid her down and instant screams again. Took about 20 minutes of on/off crying for her to finally fall asleep.
This is breaking my heart. Sleep training crying I could handle, but this separation anxiet, this desperate clinging to me is breaking my heart. Anyone with any advice??? I slept with her daycare sheet for a few nights so it smells like me, she has a lovey (although she doesn't care) and a familiar blanket from home. I make a point of talking about "school" and that I'm going to bring her to school and will be back to pick her up later, I always say goodbye and don't sneak out so she doesn't get scared. I don't drag out the goodbyes. We have pictures on order to decorate her crib and cubby.
HELP!
"It's not a sprint, it's a marathon." - Alex & Ani bracelet
My blog: Dodging Acorns
Re: Moms - Infant Separation Anxiety? (long)
No advice, but I just wanted to say that I feel for you, Michele! Kyle has shown signs of separation anxiety from about 4 months old (pedi said you don't normally see it that young... lucky me). He's been more clingy lately, too... and I am home with him 24-7. I can only imagine how he'd be if I actually had to leave his side for more than a couple minutes at a time.
I hope that she acclimates soon, and that you get your happy Maddy back. Hopefully it won't be a long drawn-out process for her, or for you
((( hug )))
Thanks Alicia. Maddy was actually doing really well with it up until we started daycare. She'd usually be shy with new people, but at Jerred's party in RI a few weeks ago she went from person to person with no problem. It breaks my heart that daycare is doing this to her. Ben was in daycare from the age of 6 weeks so it was normal for him, he was used to it. But then Maddy started with these two top teeth, then daycare, then ear infection last week, and now this week she is just a disaster. All my excitement about daycare and being able to work during the day is gone because I worry about her all day and I honestly dread bringing her home and having to listen to her scream for 2 hours until bedtime unless I'm holding her. Then bedtime is a nightmare.
Thanks for letting me vent, ladies. I feel horrible for maddy, I feel selfish for being tired of holding her. It's just awful.
"It's not a sprint, it's a marathon." - Alex & Ani bracelet
My blog: Dodging Acorns
"It's not a sprint, it's a marathon." - Alex & Ani bracelet
My blog: Dodging Acorns
Hi, I don't post a lot here but I wanted to chime in because we went through this same thing. I don't remember how old Ben was when it started but he started fighting the bedtime routine and we couldn't figure out what to do. He actually used to be awesome with falling asleep at night and it was the naps that was aawful with. Then something just switched in his brain one day and he was great with the naps and awful with the bedtime routine. We went through the same thing, he got very clingy and would freak out if he fell asleep and realized that we had moved him or we weren't there with him anymore.
Unfortunately I don't really have any good advice. I just wanted to say that I was in the same boat. Nothing had changed for Ben though, he didn't start daycare or anything like that that could have changed his routine/shaken him up. At least you know the trigger!
So you are probably wondering how we got him out of it. Unfortunately its really not a very good solution but it worked for us: he now falls asleep in his stroller. And I will probably get a lot of flack for that but that's what ended up working for us. He now knows that at the end of his bedtime routine (which includes him holding every lovey he can think of, his blankies, his mickey, scout, etc), he is going to lay down in his stroller. He doesn't get rocked, he just seems to feel a little safer in the smaller space. He was swaddled up until he could roll over and he used to love falling asleep in my arms so i think this is what makes him feel safe now.
Hope that helps a little. I know I didn't offer much advice, I guess the main point I wanted to say is to find what works for your LO and that I have been there!!
-Haley
"It's not a sprint, it's a marathon." - Alex & Ani bracelet
My blog: Dodging Acorns
I bet it is just a lot of things going on for her at once. The teething, daycare & then being sick. Maybe you could spend a little time with her at daycare or take pictures home of the teachers and talk about them a lot?
I know how exhausting it is. Physically & emotionally. I'm sure it is just a stage and she wil begin to acclimate
Did her top teeth come in yet? I can see Liza's whites, but they haven't come all the way yet. I HATE teething!! lol
Top teeth aren't all the way in yet, nope. Taking FOREVER. Like 3+ weeks from the time they started to cut through. Gah. Pics of the daycare teachers isn't a bad idea! I talk about school ALL the time with her and Ben, together and apart.
Ugh. I'm over teething too!
"It's not a sprint, it's a marathon." - Alex & Ani bracelet
My blog: Dodging Acorns