Sex & Romance
GeorgeAndWeezy
member
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Note: This only affects The Nest's community members and will not affect members on The Bump or The Knot.
Our tech team has launched updates to The Nest today. As a result of these updates, members of the Nest Community will need to change their password in order to continue participating in the community. In addition, The Nest community member's avatars will be replaced with generic default avatars. If you wish to revert to your original avatar, you will need to re-upload it via The Nest.
If you have questions about this, please email help@theknot.com.
Thank you.
Note: This only affects The Nest's community members and will not affect members on The Bump or The Knot.
How do I get past being One and Done?
If I orgasm it's always from oral and only once. After, the O, I can't seem to achieve another. DH is willing to keep trying but it's almost like any addition touching/stimulation is too much; even annoying. Is there any hope of changing this? Marathon sex sessions are out of the question. We have two toddlers running around.
Re: How do I get past being One and Done?
IMHO, maybe you are trying to reach for one so badly that your body stops.
Try just enjoying the moment and concentrating on that, without even trying for one O and maybe you might be surprised.
I've never had more than one. Not everyone is able to have multiples.
Why is one not enough?
I am thrilled that you have one. According to other Nesties on this board, some people aren't getting any.
But I also understand the desire to have more. If one is good, how much better would TWO be?! It sounds as if your body has a clear refractory period after your first orgasm.
So, you have your first orgasm through oral. Does that usually happen toward the beginning of sex and then you guys start to have intercourse? Have you ever experienced a second orgasm during the same round of sex? Have you tried having more oral sex after a period of penetration? Or tried giving your clitoris stimulation (manually or with toys) during intercourse?
Let's also not forget the psychological component. If your husband verbally encouraged you to orgasm during penetration "I want to feel you come on my ____!" or "I want to feel you come from the inside!", do you think that would help? Or if you like your power dynamic a bit on the dominatrix side, you could "force" him to service you orally again (demanding your complete satisfaction) or tell him that you are going to use him like your personal sex toy until you are finished with him.
Finally, I have no idea how old you are, but many women become more orgasmic as they get older. Perhaps your "one and done" years are going to be followed by "two and through" or "three and free" times.
Yep, this is me exactly.
Well, I know everyone isn't able to have multiples. But how do people know if they're capable of multiples. They have to try right? Learn some knew things or something, right?
I just don't get why not having multiples is something to "get over", like it's traumatic or something. I guess I object to the phrasing.
My guess is the harder-to-obtain status makes women want it more. Also, on occasion, romance novels make it sound like it's oh-so-easy to climax in multiples due to some swashbuckling rogue who swept a maiden off her feet.
The reality is that yes, multiples can be a cool goal, but it should be about the journey, not the destination. If you're stressing out about it badly, then you're just not going to make it happen.
Also, a good place to start would be seeing if you can achieve multiples solo. Eliminate some of the performance anxiety to discover if you are actually capable. Then, once you know that it's possible, remember how you got there a second time, and help instruct your partner.