Wedding gift question

FutureMrsNAH · March 2011

If you're in a wedding, that's OOT so you've had to travel, does that affect your wedding gift decision? Would you give less money because of the travel costs and other costs that you're incurring or do you give them same you'd give normally? Also, do you take into account what might be the norm $ gift in that state/area or do you go with what you'd give in your area?

I just thought of this while driving in today because I actually almost forgot I would need to give a gift! There's been lots of other things to worry/stress about with this wedding! I always give money for the wedding and something from the registry for the shower.

SSM&JLM · March 2011

I did. We spent so much money traveling for both showers, bparties and the wedding itself that when it came time for a gift, there just wasn't much left.

I ended up picking something smallish off the registry for one and making a scrapbook for the other (b/c I know she loves to scrapbook).

I had to trek out to the homestead for a wedding, that was $$$. And the bride and groom did not take care of their guests in a manner I thought a "destination" wedding should have.

Kupuggie · March 2011

We don't. We just use the rule that whatever they gave us, we give them. It def. stinks though having to travel and pay for those expenses on top of all the wedding items.

FutureMrsNAH · March 2011

Oooh, the Homestead - yeah, $$$.

Puggie, If I recall correctly this friend didn't give us a wedding present!! And now I'm in her wedding, threw the shower, went to the bachelorette, bought a very expensive BM dress, am getting hair, makeup and toes done, traveling to SC, paying for a hotel for 3 days and leaving my baby for the longest time yet.

lolabright · March 2011

I normally give what they gave us. Before the wedding I would deduct some money from their gift if the travel expensses were too much.

brie&drew · March 2011

We mostly do what Puggs does. We try to keep it on par with what they did for us. Or if we aren't very close, don't know them well, we factor travel in a little.

katenney · March 2011

How about a $50 gift card to Pottery Barn or Crate and Barrel or somewhere they are registered with a little card that says "to help buy that...."

SSM&JLM · March 2011

Kupuggie:
We don't. We just use the rule that whatever they gave us, we give them. It def. stinks though having to travel and pay for those expenses on top of all the wedding items.

Then I definitely don't feel bad. One of them got me something for like $30 off the registry and I think I spent about that on theirs. The other didn't even give us a wedding gift.

moviesprincess · March 2011

If you have done all that for her wedding and she did not even get you a present, I would get something smallish.

Rebekistan · March 2011

We give everyone the same amount, regardless of whether we attend or not (if it's a close friend). Sometimes it's less than what they gave us, well usually it is b/c we don't give big wedding gifts, but that's the way it is with our budget. So far, for any wedding we've had to travel for, we've had an awesome time, so we count that in our vacation budget.

For people who traveled to our wedding, I didn't expect them to even give a gift; same with BMs who paid for their dresses. I think everyone did, though.

Sometimes the best gifts are the most thoughtful though -- give them something that's inexpensive but thoughtful and priceless

shelley1002 · March 2011

We give what we can. It's usually the same amount to everyone. Of course someone not as close to us may not get as much as one of our closest friends but it's not too far off.

Mitzzi23 · March 2011

We usually give what they gave us which works since it's all the same circle of friend's and we all give the same. However, if they Didn't get you anything and youve done all that I would say just something small.

FutureMrsNAH · March 2011

Thanks girls. I think I'll be safe in getting maybe something small and personal and calling it a day. She's my oldest friend but dang, this has all added up!

tshott · March 2011

We usually give $100 for close friends and close family members. When I was in my friend's wedding in August, we had to travel and we still gave $100. We don't pay attention to what they gave us. IMO, that makes me feel petty.

With that said, if we can't afford to give $100 at the time based on other circumstances, we don't give that much. I would say that given the other costs, you'd be totally justified spending little on a gift as long as it was meaningful.

Wedding gift question

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