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Swedish parents keep baby's gender a secret
...to avoid the child being "forced into a specific gender mold."
Good idea, or bad? Or crazy?
http://www.thelocal.se/20232/
I don't agree with this, but it's a fascinating read.
Re: Swedish parents keep baby's gender a secret
Wow, that is fascinating. Overall, I think it's a terrible idea. I think it could lead to a lot of confusion for the child once he/she starts school and that's not fair to him/her. While this seems like a very interesting experiment, and I would be interested to see how this kid turns out, I think it's somewhat cruel to do to your child. I'm all for rebelling against society's strict gender roles (dolls are for girls, trucks are boys), I think this is too extreme. I think it's possible to identify a child as a boy or as a girl, and still have an open mind about toys, clothes, etc.
That said... Most likely this isn't the case but because I just finished reading Middlesex last week, I can't help but wonder if perhaps this child didn't have either all male or all female sex organs when he/she was born. And so the parents are waiting to see if he/she shows more girl or boy tendencies before "assigning" a gender so that there's less a chance that they get it wrong? There's no inclination in this article that this is the case, but the thought crossed my mind.
I think it's very interesting. I imagine their sex will come out by the time they reach school, the child will know whether he/she is a boy or a girl, and will probably tell people.
I really don't see the harm in it - the one doctor states "Ignoring children's natures simply doesn?t work" but I don't think they are ignoring the child's nature at all - just the opposite. They are letting the child choose fully what he/she wants without the influence/pressure of others who have already defined genders.
I wouldn't necessarily raise my child and hide their sex, but I'm all for throwing out the sterotypical business. For example, if I had a son that loved pink, playing with dolls and wearing dresses, I don't see a problem with letting him explore that.
It would make a good sociological study and an interesting novel. If gender is a marker they don't want their child to have to live with, they could do so in a zillion other ways.
Some random thoughts:
I really enjoyed that one of the commenters was named Pinker.
What a terrible story at the end - about the twins.
Henry named his doll Pop.
That was absolutely horrifying to read. So sad. I can't imagine the guilt the parents felt for makiing that decision.
I can't imagine what the bleep they were thinking when they made that decision either.
I'm sure they must have thought they were doing what was best, but omg.
Weird.
DS is for sure a boy, but he looooves pretending to be Ariel and Tinkerbell, among other things. Today he asked to be called "Lizzie" after watching something; I am Lizzie's father. If he slips up and calls me Mommy, he corrects himself. He knows he's a boy, and he loves racecars, and many other traditionally "boy" things, but we certainly don't discourage him from using his imagination. And we didn't need to deny him a public gender in order for that to happen. I feel bad for "Pop" later in life.
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