September 2008 Weddings
Dear Community,
Our tech team has launched updates to The Nest today. As a result of these updates, members of the Nest Community will need to change their password in order to continue participating in the community. In addition, The Nest community member's avatars will be replaced with generic default avatars. If you wish to revert to your original avatar, you will need to re-upload it via The Nest.
If you have questions about this, please email help@theknot.com.
Thank you.
Note: This only affects The Nest's community members and will not affect members on The Bump or The Knot.
Our tech team has launched updates to The Nest today. As a result of these updates, members of the Nest Community will need to change their password in order to continue participating in the community. In addition, The Nest community member's avatars will be replaced with generic default avatars. If you wish to revert to your original avatar, you will need to re-upload it via The Nest.
If you have questions about this, please email help@theknot.com.
Thank you.
Note: This only affects The Nest's community members and will not affect members on The Bump or The Knot.
Friday Fun Day (FFFC)
Happy FRIDAY!
My FF confession is that I cannot believe that in such a bad economy we are spending a TON of money to do a freaking military fly-over of Fenway for opening day. How much oil will be wasted and how much money does that cost to celebrate baseball? I think it is so wasteful and stupid.
Re: Friday Fun Day (FFFC)
Oh Sam I am so jealous!
My confession is even though I have to work this weekend I doubt I'll get much work done today as my mind is wiped out.
Planning bio My DIY blog The Maine Bio
2012 Reading Challenge
This is my confession too... Sam, very jealous and Jamie I have to work Saturday too. If you need an email buddy I will be working 8-12/1ish
Actually I have one more I'm a PW today:)
I'm making extra $ walking dogs for my dog walker its going to be about $150 a week (who knew!) Today I get paid (in cash) I'm getting a mani/pedi and maybe a something at Marshalls if I find a cute pair of shoes or something, I'm spending it on me... I will be putting about 50% of my earnings into a purse fund, and the other half into our general house fund to go towards mutual stuff, like the lawn, flowers etc, but I think I should get to spend some of it on me and not be included in my fun money, Dh doesn't agree, but hey I'm the one walking the dogs and scooping...
Oh I think that should totally be your fun money. It's not like it's your only income and this is something you picked up because you WANTED to, not because you guys needed the money.
I'm really going to pressure Pat on the house cleaner I think. I just got another really big raise so it's not like we can't afford it and it would just make my life so much easier (especially since we both hate cleaning).
Planning bio My DIY blog The Maine Bio
2012 Reading Challenge
Mine is that I'm so glad JT has no idea how ovulation/mentrusal cycles work, he has agreed to the opps method for 6 months, we're already half way through that, and then we'll really start trying to have a baby.
Since he has no clue, I've been extra willing to have sexy time around O time and I don't feel bad about it at all. And as a disclaimer he is totally okay with having a baby, he just doesn't want sex to become a chore.
Books read in 2011: 111
Books read in 2012: 100
my read shelf:
we're totally getting a housecleaner at least once/month when we get a new place. I cannot tell you the last time we properly cleaned our bathroom. I will care more with babies (our house isn't visible dirty but i know it isn't technically clean).
i've been tracking points on weightwatchers for 2 months now and havent lost an ounce (not ww's fault; I am way over each week). I think I'm going to give it a rest and really focus on my fitness for a while, probably until my birthday in july, then re-evaluate. that's not even a fun confession though but i wanted to tell someone.
random confession: I spent so much money buying random sodas at work since suppossedly giving it up in Jan that C bought me three cases of cans this wekeend and told me they have to last till the end of april.
"Oh I think that should totally be your fun money. It's not like it's your only income and this is something you picked up because you WANTED to, not because you guys needed the money. "
-EXACTLY!!! I mean I still have to do my "real" job and although it's been a little interesting juggling conference calls, and email/phone (thank god for my Iphone) it has been great! I told him I thought he'd be happy that I am figuring out a way to save money for the things I want that he thinks are insane and it isn't coming from our household money. So in an essence we are saving... He didn't like my way of thinking... I have to walk a lot of dogs for my purse! I only get $7 a walk:)
I go back to work Monday after having been off since the beginning of December. I'm really not looking forward to it. I've been enjoying my time off and the volunteer work I've been doing. I know I should be thankful to have a job...but I still really don't want to go.
I don't make much, but the $$ will be nice though.
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The mayor of Boston wants to ban sugary drinks in cafeterias, vending machines, and street vendors on city property to curb obesity. I understand that obesity in society needs to be addressed, but not allowing sugary drinks in those locations isn't going to help much. If people really want those drinks they will go somewhere else or bring from home. I suppose they are really hoping on the inconvenience factor deturing people from doing that.
What really bothers me is that 100% juice is on the okay list. There's TONS of sugar in juice. About as much as soda (according to this random site I found). They say they aren't trying to punish people, that they are punishing themselves by drinking sugary drinks. But I like to drink regular soda from time to time. I don't drink it every day, just a couple times a week. I HATE diet soda; I think it tastes like crap. If I worked in Boston and couldn't go down to my cafeteria and get a regular soda I would feel like I'm being punished! Luckily I don't, but hopefully I'll never get thirsty for a Coke while walking around the Boston Common.
#1 - Jeff and I gave up a FREE vacation to Vegas with my parents. He doesn't want my sister to watch B and I don't want his mom to. Plus I'm not ready to leave her for 5 days yet.
#2 - J stayed home from work today because he is in so much pain again. It has been going on for about a week and he can't get into the DR until Monday because he was OOT. I'm FREAKING out that something is seriously wrong again. WhyTF couldn't his surgery just fix him?! He is miserable. It then makes me miserable. I don't know how we will handle this if it gets as bad as it was before. (And I think it is on the way - I almost took him to the hospital this morning but he said he wanted to see how his pain meds work first)
#3 - We had an argument the other morning because he has slept in our bed no joke 10 times in the last 18 months. I miss my husband. I told him I feel like the only time he wants to be near me is if he wants sex. I know that isn't true, but it is still how I feel. I know he is more comfortable sleeping on the sofa (because of #2) but I still miss him. I feel guilty for saying anything about how I feel because of his pain. I couldn't help it though the words just popped out. I feel really bad about saying it.
#4 - I'm mad that his pain is flaring up now because we have a fun weekend ahead. A wedding tomorrow night for one of my brothers closest friends who I adore and Sunday we are taking B to the Hawks game. He is going to be miserable and I'm now dreading all of it.
#5 - I get mad that he is in pain because he doesn't help me much anymore because of it. He lays on the sofa and plays with B while I do everything for her. (Bottles, cook her food, baths, most diaper changes ect.) He used to be so helpful.
I feel like I bad person because of all of the above.
I totally agree that it should be your fun money. We budget based on our FT jobs and anything extra we make, we can use at our own discretion. For example, DH's officiating income is his fun money. He does share with about a check every other week with me when he is working 4 or 5 nights a week because I take on more of the housework during those time. But, other than that, it goes to his fun money, his Roth (which, technically, will be joint for us), his car fund, etc. If I do extra work that pays once I'm finished with school, it will be my fun money.
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I feel like my best friend is pulling away. She got divorced last year and DH and I were 100% there for her. We got even closer (which was nice, but not the circumstances that I would have wanted that to happen under). She started dating someone about 8 months ago. He is ok, but there are things about him that really bother me (I do not in any way tell her this or let her know because he is not abusive or anything like that). He is just kind of rude, you know? Anyway, I feel like he is part of her pulling away and it makes me really sad. I don't know what to do. She is such a great person and I don't want to make her feel bad, but I'm also really sad that we don't see each other or talk as much as we used to. DH and I have talked about it and he sees it too.
Not really a flameful confession, but something I wanted to get off my chest.
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I have a few:
1. I am not going to a nestie/bumpie GTG this Sunday b/c honestly most of the girls that are going I can not relate to anymore. I had to break off my time on my local bump board b/c I just feel I can not contribute there. I get the feeling my input is not needed b/c "I would not understand b/c I am not a parent." I get it but hearing someone say that is hurtful. Like its my fault I am not PG...well I guess it is in a way.
2. I am really ticked off at DH b/c I made all this food last week and it was to last us for this week for both lunch and dinners. All of it was gone it by Tuesday evening. I had to hide some of it for my lunch on Wed. I know I should not harp on him b/c he is sensitive about this food and weight thing but the portion sizes are at least 2-3 portions compared to mine. He says my food is good so that is why he takes large portions. You can still enjoy my food for smaller portions.
3. I have not gone to the gym since Monday morning. I even drove by my gym last night with the workout clothes in the car. I decided to clean our place instead and enjoy some raviolis from a local Italian deli and there were AWESOME.
I got another really big raise at work and now I make close to 3x what Pat makes and he's starting to resent it. When I got the raise last week he wasn't happy for me/us and told me that I didn't even need him. As if it was ever about money between us, but it made me feel really badly.
He's come around a little, but I know it makes him feel uncomfortable. I keep reminding him that this company could be sold out from under me at any minute and it's really easy come/ easy go and he knows that's the truth, but I just don't understand why he's not happier that we have more disposable income. I've NEVER played the money card with him and he wastes more money on stupid stuff than I do.
Planning bio My DIY blog The Maine Bio
2012 Reading Challenge
2012 Reading Challenge
I have a huge amount of work to get done today. Some of it is pretty urgent too and I have spent an hour of my morning so far on Nesting instead
We are just crazy busy at work right now, plus I have maternity leave to prep for and it is all a little overwhelming. So instead I am ignoring it!
while I'm on a baby-related role, we're starting to think about registering (and pretty much have everythign picked out since weve looked for so long). Now C is getting weird about registering for nice strollers (thing maclaren techno, not bugaboo frog) b/c she thinks her family will think we're snobs. I DO NOT FRICKING CARE. Its nice and all her cousin got a hand-me-down jogger, but i dont know anyone with twins to get a Bob from, and no i do not want the cheapy one your mom found on craigslist that is only $50 under list price anyway! I'll get the damn cheapo one with a coupon new for that price ($140 on craigs list, $190 new for a babytrend double jogger). And her cousin got a perfectly nice brand new City Mini, but of course singles are cheaper. Ugh. This is a stupid arguement.
ETA: I'm not even oppossed to craigslist strollers, but 20% off list isn't enough for me since you can get brand new ones for that much if you watch for deals/coupons!
I've been in vacay mode all week and have barely gotten any work done. There are some things I *have* to get done today and I still have no desire to do them....
Oh, and I'm irrationally annoyed that little SIL set her wedding date for next May. DH and I had decided that we wanted to start TTC this summer, however if it were to actually happen quickly, I would either be super-pg, or have a tiny brand new baby in May. Booooo, so the TTC timeline has been all effed up. I don't mind being pg and in the wedding (I'm a BM), I just don't want to be traveling at 8-9 mos pg, ya know?
Also, DH is on the brink of a promotion....if the promotion moves us and it takes me a long time to find a job, TTC is pushed back even more so I can get a job with FMLA benefits and wait a year before going on leave. And while I'm happy DH is doing so well at work, I don't really want to push back TTC much longer than a few months.
Mine is probably flameworthy.
I'm cutting back on my personal spending, not just to save more money in general, but so that I can put more than normal into savings, so there's more in there if I decide to leave. I'd take the majority of the savings with me. Not that it's a ton at this point, but it'd get me by for a few months w/o a job.
My friend is having a baby this summer and planning a wedding to the baby's father in Oct. They fight a lot and have other issues and she really wants to wait until next Oct for the wedding to give them time to sort out being parents and living together before jumping into a marriage. All sound thinking on her part, but she has given in to marry him this year with a teeny baby by their side as her FI is concerned his father won't be alive to see him wed next year. That's all well and good, but they have serious issues in their relationship without a baby in the picture to the point they are in counseling already and can't have a simple discussion on things like whether or not to have the baby circ'd if its a boy.
She was thinking of breaking up with him until she got her BFP. Well, she just told me another one of his vice's yesterday and now I'm just flat out concerned for her. She used to tell me when they fought and now she's trying to hide it more or laughs it off as another stupid argument if she does tell me...if she's trying to hide it, that concerns me that maybe it's even more frequent (he's not physical with her- all emotional) which isn't a good environment for a baby?!
I honestly think she's settling for several reasons: 1) She's terrified to go it alone with a baby even though she knows the father would pay support and be there for the child and she is well established in her career and owns her own home, 2) She has a fantasy idea of them working it out and living happily ever after (I hope this is the case, for her sake!), and 3) She thinks this is her last chance to get married b/c she's close to 40. I think he loves her and cares for her, but isn't in love with her and he's pushing the marriage to make things look "right" to his dying father as they are old fashioned Catholics. He's a nice guy, but I have my reservations about them being right for each other. She asked me to be her MaOH and I'm thrilled about that, but I feel horrible that I'm so worried for her and what she may or may not be getting into. I feel it's not my place to say anything more than I already have from an outside POV to her, so instead I'm offering as much support as I can and praying things work out for her, him, and that baby.