Our tech team has launched updates to The Nest today. As a result of these updates, members of the Nest Community will need to change their password in order to continue participating in the community. In addition, The Nest community member's avatars will be replaced with generic default avatars. If you wish to revert to your original avatar, you will need to re-upload it via The Nest.
If you have questions about this, please email help@theknot.com.
Thank you.
Note: This only affects The Nest's community members and will not affect members on The Bump or The Knot.
Am i the only one that does this?
First off, I created a new account because my family has Nest accounts and i don't want to share with them what goes on in the bedroom.
Recently, during sex, DH and i started discussing fantasies. While we are in "action" he'll pretend that he's having sex with the next door neighbor and visa versa. We'll say what we like about the other person, for example he'll say "she has the sexiest body, i go crazy looking at her in her tight shorts". I get a little jealous but it turns me on too. After sex, we don't discuss anything that we said during sex. We trust eachother very much and i know he would never act on his feelings towards other girls but when i hear him talking about other girls physical attractiveness, it kind of pisses me off.
Is this normal? Does anyone else do this or get turned on by it?
Re: Am i the only one that does this?
We'll say what we like about the other person
ok so what are you saying about the other person?
listen if you can t handle the fantasy stuff that includes other people STOP doing it. you can not have it both ways.
Same here, I would leave that alone
Maybe consider switching to fantasies about celebrities and other people that are "unattainable". That might make you feel less threatened.
But personally, I would never engage in this kind of fantasy because it would make me jealous, insecure, upset and bitter.
Same here. I get so sick and tired of hearing my husband go on and on about how "so-and-so is so beautiful." I don't want to hear about how beautiful or "hot" another woman is from my own husband!
But, I guess to each their own.
We get a lot of callous douche husbands on this board, don't we?
That is exactly what I was thinking. If my FI ever went on and on about how hot or beautiful he thought another woman is, he would get a swift kick in the nuts!
In my case, he rationalizes it by talking about female celebrities that he "wouldn't stand a chance with even if he was single." He's even tried to turn it around on me by saying I do the same thing (talking about male celebrities), which I don't.
I agree. Fantasizing about someone else while being intimate just opens the door for all sorts of problems. During that moment, it should be about the two of you, not "the next door neighbor."
September 25, 2011, Mommy lost her little angel. Mommy will always love you, and will forever hold that special place in my heart!
At 35W2D, my little angel made her appearance. I never knew what love was until I met you. 12/4/12
Well I sometimes fantasize DH is some one else while we're having sex, whether it be another man or another woman but I don't tell my DH b/c this would hurt his feelings.
If you guys feel comfortable with this, than it's normal for you!
I would just make sure it never left the bedroom and that you would let each other know as soon as it got uncomfortable.
I personally think that this it'll become a step to divorce in the future. At least at my house it would. If your husband gets turned on by that, there's something wrong with it... you get turned on, because he probably goes harder, faster, the way you like, whatever.. right? Not because of what he's saying, especially because you said you get pissed off by that.
Why don't you stop this for 1/2 nights, tell him you want to make sex, but you want him to say ''dirty'' things about YOU, how he feels about you, what he likes in you.. and you'll do the same. See if this will change something, if he'll get as turned on as before... IF NOT, then you have a problem.
If it was my fianc?, LOL the first word would be enough to totally turn me down and start our first argument. Maybe break up with him.
Try my idea and you'll see how it turns. Good luck.