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Our tech team has launched updates to The Nest today. As a result of these updates, members of the Nest Community will need to change their password in order to continue participating in the community. In addition, The Nest community member's avatars will be replaced with generic default avatars. If you wish to revert to your original avatar, you will need to re-upload it via The Nest.
If you have questions about this, please email help@theknot.com.
Thank you.
Note: This only affects The Nest's community members and will not affect members on The Bump or The Knot.
Annoyed or not?
So MIL watches DD two days a week.... And she'll run errands and bring K all over sometimes while watching her. I'm kind of annoyed because MIL doesn't tell me ahead of time. I mean granted she's doing us a favor watching K. But she's my daughter... I wanna know where she is!!! Am I being a pain? I miss my old daycare.... At least I knew where K was all the time! :-(
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Re: Annoyed or not?
Childcare is a very touchy subject. That was my reason for paying for a center. To me it was important that I know where the child is.
However it is your MIL and if she was watching her on a weekend would you expect her to stay home? (I know this is not what you want to hear) I don't think you can ask a family member to not run errands unless it was discussed before hand. IMO
I guess it depends on where and how often.
My mom watches DD during the week as does one of our friends. My mom does not have a car seat so she is going nowhere with her. Our friend does have a car seat that we purchased. So far, she has only taken her to pick her son up from school on a rare occassion. I know she would never take her shopping all day or that kind of thing. I don't really have a problem with her having her in the car (or I wouldnt have bought the carseat)...I also know she is accessible by phone and she always tells me.
I agree with a pp, if she has a phone and she is not taking advantage or if there is no reason for concern (bad driver, eyesight, etc.) then to me, it wouldn't be an issue.
i agree, but like rblucy, i dont have any kids yet either.
I can totally understand not wanting to disrupt her routine. I didnt think of that aspect. I can see myself def getting annoyed then.
I agree with you and I think you have every right to get upset. I don't have any kids, but this would really annoy me. You've already spoken to your MIL about giving you the heads up and it seems like some of the errands are not out of necessity. She shouldn't be taking K to everyone's home and job just to show her off and disrupt her schedule. If K misses a nap, then it's you who has to deal with a tired kid at the end of the day, which isn't fair.
My mom rarely takes him out on Friday. She also tells me if she is taking him out at all.
MIL takes Jack out a lot and I don't find out until pick up. Usually she does pick him up from our house in the morning, so she has to drive him at least 1 place. I have chosen to leave this alone ONLY because I allow my mom to drive with him.
We have also had 1 of our sitters take him out for errands, because they do it as a favor and don't charge so I don't want to make them stay in all day. Another girl I am using this summer, and tried her 2 times a month ago took Jack to museum and park, with my permission.
Funny though I refuse to allow my BIL/SIL drive with him because I see how they drive normally and turns on 2 wheels is no good.
My parents babysit 5 days a week and I know that they take E in the car with them often. I am okay with it because I know they are super careful with her and also because I know that I can always get them on their cell phones. I don't know if I would be comfortable with anyone else putting her in their car though.
Try to casually ask what her plans are for the day to get a sense of where she is off to for piece of mind. If it really is bugging you I would talk to her about it, keeping it to yourself isn't always the best idea!
Good luck