Sex & Romance
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Our tech team has launched updates to The Nest today. As a result of these updates, members of the Nest Community will need to change their password in order to continue participating in the community. In addition, The Nest community member's avatars will be replaced with generic default avatars. If you wish to revert to your original avatar, you will need to re-upload it via The Nest.
If you have questions about this, please email help@theknot.com.
Thank you.
Note: This only affects The Nest's community members and will not affect members on The Bump or The Knot.
Secret Twitter account...is it wrong? (long)
Hi! I'm new here, I have a problem. I'm sorry it's kind of long, I hope you can help me out. I can't really talk about it with anybody because it's kind of embarrasing. My husband and I have been married 11 months but dated for 3, we have always been open and honest and had a sexy health life. A while ago, he opened a Twitter account and later asked me to open one too. He taught me how to use it and it was fun, people figured out we were husband and wife on Twitter which is ok. One day, he followed a girl (on Twitter) and she said "Thanks for the follow, sweetie!" which I saw because I checked his TL, to me it really wasn't a big deal, but I asked him about it, in a joking way. Well he took it that I was jealous and said he hadn't done anything. Which is true, he didn't do anything wrong. Time goes on and he keeps talking about this girl who lives in England and is a fan of the same basketball team that we are. After a big game that they won, I asked him for her name so that I could follow her since I didn't follow any fans of that team. He said no, that I didn't have to follow everybody he did and that I shouldn't spy on him on Twitter. Well to me, if you don't want anybody to read what you are saying, then DON'T post it!! But he didn't get that. We got into a huge argument about me not trusting him and stuff. Lately, he's been very possesive of his phone, before the big blow out he even made a comment on how we shoudln't check each other's phones because it was personal stuff, that what he and his buddies texted about was none of my business. That made me suspicious, plus I noticed that he might have another Twitter account. Last weekend, we both got drunk on Friday night, came home and he passed out with the phone in his hand. I took it from him to plug to the charger and I got the idea to check it. Sure enough, he has another account under a nasty name and he follows all these girls that like to talk dirty. He has Twitter sex with them at all hours of the day, while he's at work, while he's at home with me!!! He doesn't say his name or that he's married, but he calls them baby and lover, just like he calls me. He even gives them his email address and says that he's on IM too. It hurts me that he does this and I don't know if I'm making a big deal about it. We still have sex but it just seems cold. Maybe it's all in my head. Thanks for reading and thanks in advance for any advice that you could give me.
Re: Secret Twitter account...is it wrong? (long)
He's clearly cheating. Why is this not obvious to you? Divorce him.
WTF is a sexy health life?
He's cheating on Twitter, but nothing physical, should I confront him about it?
Oh and I meant to say a "healthy sex" life. ooops!
Cheating is cheating, whether it's physical or not. By all means, you should confront him about this! If he cares about you at all, he'll stop. If he doesn't, then I'm sorry to say that it's only gonna get worse, and you need to kick him to the curb.
And no, you're not overreacting at all! You see behavior that is threatening your marriage, and you have every right to know what is going on. If I were you, I'd create a secret account of my own and play along right with him, only to let him have it when he least expects it (sounds kinda sick and twisted, but sometimes, you have to do what you have to do).
Sorry you have to go through this....
You are an idiot.
The posession of his phone is a dead give away he's up to no good.
Dump this guy posthaste. He's cheating; he's got no business sexting anyone or chatting up anybody inappropriately -- he is doing both so he's guilty of cheating.
Show Mr. Popularity the door posthaste. And get yourself tested. Perhaps you can even get a civil annulment. Good luck.
This. The fact that he is already cheating on an emotional level and sexting other women means he's crossed the line. He has no respect for you or your marriage. Get rid of him. He's not worth the pain.
Also, he will likely get defensive and try to find a way to turn this on you, because you snooped on his phone. If he is this egotistical to want/need the emotional validation of twitsex or whatever the heck it is called, he will be thinking he is the victim when the **** hits the fan about it.
Of course you don't want to divorce him. Who would want to divorce a liar who has at least emotionally cheated (and from the sounds of email exchanging, probably already physically cheated) and instead of being honest with you has gotten defensive and called YOU the crazy one. He sounds wonderful.
Good luck with stalking your husband and tracking what he does both online and in person every second of every day, sounds like fun!
If this was your daughter/sister/girlfriend telling you this story, would you tell her to stay?
Even if you don't decide to leave him (and I really think you should) your marriage will never be the same as it was before this happened. Plus, you will always have to worry about the fact that he will probably do this again. Do you want to take those risks?
The fact that he also hasn't apologized and admitted to you his wrongdoings also speaks to where he values his vows to you, which is very little. You deserve better but you're only going to get better if you don't allow aholes to walk on you.
This has to be the dumbest sh!t i've ever heard.
There is no room for secrets in a marriage. Randy and I have 100% access to each others accounts. The only hiding that takes place are the "Allana's gifts" and "Randys gifts" email folders we use during the holidays and around each others birthdays.
You need to end it with him. He's practically cheating on his twitter girls with his wife at this point. I'm so sorry but you need to lock up your heart around him.
Sad what the internet does to some people. It makes me wonder if they would otherwise cheat without the ample opportunity presented by modern technology. Or if that just makes the justification that much easier.
T&P to those left standing empty-handed when their partner betrays them like this.
September 25, 2011, Mommy lost her little angel. Mommy will always love you, and will forever hold that special place in my heart!
At 35W2D, my little angel made her appearance. I never knew what love was until I met you. 12/4/12
Yes, honey why are you having online affairs and sex with other people...? We can fix it even though its been going on for years. Maybe you are depressed honey? Maybe I'm not giving you what you need? Maybe I'm a cold fish? Its ok though w can fix it because you are such a great stand up guy.
Did someon drop you on your head? or are you her husband?
I find it really disheartening that you even have to ask that if this is wrong.
I find it even worse that you are even considering staying with him, just because now you can "stay one step ahead of him" (do you realize how ridiclous it is to stay with someone you cannot trust completely and you feel like you need to "outmaneuver"?)
I second this.