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Doctor's appointment vent
So I had an appointment yesterday and because I go to a practice, there are multiple doctors which I've been seeing since I've been pregnant. Anyway, so far I haven't had a good experience with any of them and yesterday was no different.
Yesterday, the doctor walked in, didn't even introduce herself and just said "Ok, I'm doing your pap and exam today". No greeting or anything. Ok then. So without a word of warning she just goes ahead with business and then complains because I'm "tightening up" and she said "if you just relax this will be over sooner". WOW I'm sorry doctor, maybe I'm not relaxed because you're being a cold b!tch!?
So fine, she finishes and then asks if I have any questions in a tone that leads me to believe she doesn't really care anyway, and she just has to ask. So I ask her a few things and she answers like she could care less. Then she says "ok, see you in 4 weeks" and left the room like she had somewhere better to be. (I was even early for my appointment, so it wasn't like I was holding her up).
I'm just kind of disgusted so far. I really don't like going there feeling like I'm annoying every doctor I see. I'd like to feel comfortable asking questions and not feeling rushed and like I'm on the doctor's last nerve.
The woman I usually see is a midwife, but obviously since I'm pregnant, I need to meet all the doctors. I'm just having nightmares about how the delivery is going to be if I have someone like the doctor I met yesterday.
Do you think I'm being too sensitive? I don't want to switch practices, but I'm really getting frustrated here:(
Re: Doctor's appointment vent
updated 10.03.12
Rach - that really sucks! I would be annoyed as well. I would likely switch doctors if I felt like I wasn't being attended to properly.
And I likely would have given that doctor a piece of my mind when she was finished. You're a human, you should be treated with some care and respect!
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Exactly. So if you like one out of, say, 10, odds are not in your favor. I'm sorry. =(
updated 10.03.12
I agree with the other ladies, it's still early enough that you can switch practices and you definitely should look for a new one. in order to have the most pleasant delivery possible, you have to have a doctor that listens to you and makes you feel comfortable. That's really important.
If I were in your shoes, I would call around and try to find a practice where you don't have to rotate doctors. That was a huge factor to me - I didn't want to be surprised when some random doctor came in to do my delivery. The practice I went to had three doctors, but whichever one was your primary doctor was the one who committed to doing your delivery. It really made me much more relaxed and comfortable to have a doctor I knew and trusted delivery my baby.
Yea, I'd switch too.
It's so hard finding a good practice! I like mine so far but their offices are in Reston and Ashburn, so I don't know if that would be too far for you. I've never had to deal with the doctors there though since I'm only there for my pap exams.
Before I met some of the doctors, I was ok with the idea of not knowing exactly who it would be since I would have met them all once or twice before delivery. But now, its a different story. I don't want to set myself up for a miserable birth experience.
I think I have 2 or 3 more doctors to meet. I can't decide if it's worth taking my chances somewhere else. My neighbor who gave birth last year really liked her doctor, but the hospital where he delivers isn't very close at all, especially if we need to get there during rush hour:/
:sigh: I don't feel like it should be this difficult!
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She is great, but not worth it if everybody else there is rude. That sucks that rest of the practice is rude.
The only thing I'd be worried about switching is that that is the closest hospital to your house, isn't it? My friend delivered at the Inova off of Gallows. They were really nice there.
I know right! I wonder if I can pay her on the side to be there even if I switch LOL.
Yea, the hospital is like 5 minutes from my house so that is a huge bonus. Hmm, the hospital you're talking about might be where my friend delivered too...I'm not sure but I think it was.
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Switch! Dont keep going to a practice that treats you like shiit. If they're treating you like you dont matter now, its only going to get worse as you get closer to the end and on D day.
Look into midwives/docs that deliver at the hospital you like and go from there. Good luck!
Thanks! That's a good thought since I'd really like to go to that hospital.
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Are you planning on hiring a doula, Rach? I got recommendations for docs from my doula. I have a family practice doc for my prenatal care, not an OB and my insurance doesnt cover midwives. Luckily the family practice doc I chose and I have most of the very same ideas about the birth experience. I knew she was perfect for me after I met with her once.
Any friends with babies? You could ask them for recs too. Or I bet if you called the hospital and told them what type of doc and the type of person you would feel most comfortable with, they could match you up with a few different providers and give you their contact info. The hospitals here do that.
You deserve better. This is such an awesome time in your life and no doc should be treating you like your care and questions dont matter. That's what you're paying them for in the first place!
I haven't really thought much about a doula yet...but I wouldn't rule it out.
I only have the one friend who has had a baby in the area where I live...her hospital was a little further from home than I'd prefer:/
Thanks for the advice! I never thought of calling the hospital but maybe that's a good place to start.
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I agree- I loved my docs so I am driving extra far to deliver where they are - I am serious when I say I would probably drive farther to go to them. All of them are wonderful and I wouldnt mind having any of them deliver. Of course I like some better than others, but I have been through labor and delivery with friends whos docs were cold and mean... I couldnt handle that. I love that my docs work well together and listen to me and care about my pregnancy. Even the nurses keep telling us how they are going to miss us when we cut back to our pp appointments.
Rach, is there a reason your midwife can't provide all your OB care instead of the doctors? (I realize different states have different limitations on what midwives can do -- here in NE they can do all routine OB care, prescribe medications and deliver babies at hospitals/birthing centers.)
If your midwife can't provide your care at that practice, it does seem like you should probably switch practices, and I would strongly suggest seeing a practice with midwives if they can do all typical OB care there. In my experience, midwives are much less rushed, much more relaxed and much more invested in your care, how you're feeling and allow time to answer all your questions. I'm not saying there aren't wonderful doctors like this, but a practice of midwives might be an extra help to feel comfortable with your care and labor and delivery. Midwives usually have to practice under a doctor, so there's always a doctor on-call in case something out of the midwives' scope comes up.
When I was 12 weeks, I switched from my doctor to my midwives (both practice at the same clinic/hospital), but while my doctor was nice, I always felt rushed with her and didn't like the idea that if she wasn't on-call, I could have any number of doctors delivering my baby. With the midwives, I see just 3 of them, and I'm comfortable with any of those 3 delivering me.
I do recommend you switch as soon as possible so a new practice can get familiar with you. Definitely do some local Google searches and ask around for recommendations. You need to feel totally comfortable with your health care providers for the next 28 weeks and you especially want to be comfortable with who delivers your baby!
Thanks Tara! That's great advice!
I actually don't know if my midwife can do all of my OB care. I didn't think to ask since they sort of just told me I had to meet all of the doctors. I'll definitely ask that question before I switch, cause I really do love her.
How did you go about finding your midwife practice?
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I knew there was a midwives practice affiliated with my current clinic and hospital, so I was very lucky in that it was an easy switch. Since my doc and the midwives are all in the same building, transferring records was no big deal. (It will not be hard for your current practice to switch your records to a new one though, so don't be scared of that.)
There are other good midwives practices around here that I've heard about through word of mouth though. If there are any hospitals near you that you're interested in though, I would get on their website, look for their women's health/mother-baby/OB section and see if they have midwives. Or just call them. If you hear any fabulous recs for a doctor though, definitely look into them as well. Most doctors that I hear rave reviews about are ones with small practices so that the doctor you see for your care is almost always the one who will deliver your baby.
Great! Thanks for the tips!
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