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how can I deal w/a pushy bridesmaid/sil?

my sil and I are in my cousin's wedding in aug and I am have difficulty in dealing with her and not causing problems. we just started talking again after not really speaking and she is being way too pushy for me when planning the bridal shower. all of the bridesmaids were given areas that they are in charge of and she keeps overstepping what I am suppose to be doing, it would be fine but she does not want anyone overstepping what she is doing which is fine. I am in charge of driving to whiteplains to pickup the gift(fina china, only carried at that store), which everyone agreed on and now she wants to join me. I had orginally planned to go to the white plains mall with the hubby and kids and then on my way home pickup the gift. would it be mean to tell her that I dont need her to go with me? afterall, it doesnt take two people to get a gift off of her registry, how should I deal with this?

tia

 

Re: how can I deal w/a pushy bridesmaid/sil?

  • Just tell her you don't need help.
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  • I would just tell her sorry, but you have already scheduled it in as part of a busy day out and thanks but, you have it covered.
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  • imageJen&Louie:
    I would just tell her sorry, but you have already scheduled it in as part of a busy day out and thanks but, you have it covered.

    this!

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  • I agree with the girls.  And I'm the MOH in my bff's wedding... and I do NOT get along with the other MOH.  I'm a bad person to take advice from because I call people out, lol.
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  • imageBridezilla in Training:
    I agree with the girls.  And I'm the MOH in my bff's wedding... and I do NOT get along with the other MOH.  I'm a bad person to take advice from because I call people out, lol.
    love it, lol, at least you are being honest :)
  • imageJen&Louie:
    I would just tell her sorry, but you have already scheduled it in as part of a busy day out and thanks but, you have it covered.
    I love this, do you think that if I say this it would come off as I am trying to control everything? I don't want it to be that way, but that is why we were all assigned areas so no one would be stepping on anyone's toes. I don't want her to say I didn't let her help. Its so funny b/c I talked to dh abt this last night he said almost the exact ting :)
  • I don't think it would be mean to tell her you've got it covered.  Now, if you told her to go f*** herself, that might be considered mean.

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  • imagebrownsugarbabe:
    imageJen&Louie:
    I would just tell her sorry, but you have already scheduled it in as part of a busy day out and thanks but, you have it covered.
    I love this, do you think that if I say this it would come off as I am trying to control everything? I don't want it to be that way, but that is why we were all assigned areas so no one would be stepping on anyone's toes. I don't want her to say I didn't let her help. Its so funny b/c I talked to dh abt this last night he said almost the exact ting :)

    nah i dont think so, you already made other plans as part of your day to do it. You dont need any extra body tagging along.

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  • i would just say you dont' need help - jen&louie had a great way to word it.

    however, if she's nagging others i'd let it go -

    I was MOH in my sisters wedding and her SIL was such a royal PITA she annoyed the crap out of me for months and months... I did finally have to "put her in her place" so to speak because it was really out of hand - so if it gets to that point let the MOH knock her down a few pegs if she's tryin to overstep all boundaries.

  • imagebrownsugarbabe:
    imageJen&Louie:
    I would just tell her sorry, but you have already scheduled it in as part of a busy day out and thanks but, you have it covered.
    I love this, do you think that if I say this it would come off as I am trying to control everything? I don't want it to be that way, but that is why we were all assigned areas so no one would be stepping on anyone's toes. I don't want her to say I didn't let her help. Its so funny b/c I talked to dh abt this last night he said almost the exact ting :)

    No, I just think it means you have a lot going on and are being efficient by fitting the gift pick up in to your schedule.  Don't dwell on it too much, the important part is that you are fulfilling your obligation. Why would it take two people to pick up a gift anyway? 

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  • Yeah, what everyone else said. WTF is her deal?
  • At least there is communication there!  The stupid bachelorette party is being planned without me despite the fact that I offered to do the invitations (I can't attend... the party is June 12th and I'll have a newborn so I can't do an all day wine tour wherever they end up going).  You don't sound mean however you say it.
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  • I don't understand why you can't just tell her you have plans and don't need help?  Why does this need to be bigger than it is (telling her the truth since you don't need some cover up story if you already planned it out).   

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  • Ughh... I hate wedding drama. No advice, just GL and keep us posted.
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  • maybe she just wants to spend time with you or something.

    it's not a big deal to thank her for the offer and tell her that you'll be in the area with your hubby and kids and will pick it up then - no need for a separate trip.

     

  • imagebrownsugarbabe:
    imageJen&Louie:
    I would just tell her sorry, but you have already scheduled it in as part of a busy day out and thanks but, you have it covered.
    I love this, do you think that if I say this it would come off as I am trying to control everything? I don't want it to be that way, but that is why we were all assigned areas so no one would be stepping on anyone's toes. I don't want her to say I didn't let her help. Its so funny b/c I talked to dh abt this last night he said almost the exact ting :)

     

    I don't think so... if she pushes just tell her the truth that you will have your family with you and you don't want to make a separate trip for the gift when you can get it then...

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