We want sex at different times

aeJustBecause · April 2011

It seems like for the past 6 months, DH and I have wanted sex at completely different times. It feels like my sex drive starts really going in the late afternoon/early evening, and his is randomly at night. He just wakes up in the middle of the night, and starts trying to have sex with me. Whenever I "just do it" I still can't seem to get into it, and just want it to be over. And when I am into it, it seems like he just wants to get it over with.

Has anyone else been through this or have any suggestions?

Additional info: we used to have amazing sex ALL.THE.TIME. which seems to have changed after our first major fight (over a year ago). I feel like we're over the fight completely, so I don't think that has anything to do with it. But like I said, that's when the crazy sex slowed down. Also, I'm currently 7 months pregnant. Maybe that has something to do with it?

TIA!

sweetface83 · April 2011

You're being pregnant could have something to do with. You're probably too exhausted for middle of the night nookie and if you're super tired, it makes it really hard to enjoy it. Planning a date night might be helpful, even if it's just watching movies at home with a nice dinner or something else that's relaxing. Even if the magic doesn't happen, you might as well take advantage of the time together before baby arrives.

miller4285 · April 2011

I don't know about you, but even when I am NOT pregnant, I don't like being woke up in the middle of the night. I am SLEEPING. And have to get up in the morning. So I always thought it was rude to just decide he wants sex and wake you up for it. What if I decided I just HAD to have a burger and woke him up in the middle of the night from a sound sleep to ask him to get it?
Being pregnant tends to make me want it at random times, though. But when I am asleep.....don't friggin wake me up unless the house is on fire!

aeJustBecause · April 2011

Thanks for the comments ladies. I'll definitely have to try the date night, even though those even seem bland lately. I'll try to put a more positive attitude into it and see where it goes.

Miller: I agree, I love my sleep, and would prefer for it not to be interrupted lol. It didn't bother me so much that he did, but more so that that's basically the extent of excitement lately.

Mrs.Masie · April 2011

ae, why do you think a fight a year ago has anything to do with the changes in your sex life?

A year is a logn time to not be over something.

What was the fight about?

aeJustBecause · April 2011

Mrs, I don't think that really has anything to do with it, it just seems to be the point in our relationship where things changed.for us in regards to sex. The fight was over both of us closing the doors of communication. We both built up a lot against each other (some small petty things, some larger things) and for some reason just didn't communicate, and it just got to the point where a huge argument broke out.

yaykarin · April 2011

I told my husband this exact thing. Except ours isn't a time of day issue so much--- my issue is he always wants to get it on when we have something else to do... Which, granted, everyone's busy and there's always "something to do", but I mean we have a good amount of cuddle, tv, relax time each night -- PRIME relations time. But no, he always seems to want it when we're already 15 minutes late to dinner with family, or have people coming over soon, or should be at an appointment with a realtor or something like that. I have learned that it's always when I am changing for such events that seems to trigger him, so I now find myself changing as quickly and as covered up as I can when I know it's not time for loving... Oh men.

We want sex at different times

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