Family Matters
Dear Community,
Our tech team has launched updates to The Nest today. As a result of these updates, members of the Nest Community will need to change their password in order to continue participating in the community. In addition, The Nest community member's avatars will be replaced with generic default avatars. If you wish to revert to your original avatar, you will need to re-upload it via The Nest.
If you have questions about this, please email help@theknot.com.
Thank you.
Note: This only affects The Nest's community members and will not affect members on The Bump or The Knot.
Our tech team has launched updates to The Nest today. As a result of these updates, members of the Nest Community will need to change their password in order to continue participating in the community. In addition, The Nest community member's avatars will be replaced with generic default avatars. If you wish to revert to your original avatar, you will need to re-upload it via The Nest.
If you have questions about this, please email help@theknot.com.
Thank you.
Note: This only affects The Nest's community members and will not affect members on The Bump or The Knot.
Gift for soon to be step daughter
I bought a birthday gift for my soon to be step daughter (wedding in 5 months), the gift is from me, her dad and my sons (her half brothers). I bought it and I want to put that the gift is also from me and her brothers, but her dad acted like that was a problem. Now he says it is okay that it is from all of us, I want to know what your views are on this. I have have been in my fiances life for 9 years in August. I think it is time that he acts like I am a part of his life in regards to his children. I am okay if his daughter is not ready to come around me, she can do it on her own time. I am sending the gift in the mail, my fiance is out of town that is why he is not sending it himself. Oh yeah she just turned 14 years old.
Re: Gift for soon to be step daughter
I truely am not being snarky here. But why are you marrying someone who has problems with one set of his bio-children doing normal interactions (giving birthday gifts amongst siblings IS the norm) with his other set of bio-children?
And to be honest with you, if you have been together for 9 years and have two children together and you are STILL not married or STILL not allowed to be a full-fledged part of the family...why have you stayed.
YOU have a RIGHT to be an EQUAL in your marriage/relationship. And the fact that your FI is ok with you buying and sending the gift, but not including your name on the card is a pretty good indicator as to how he feels about you......and its not as a partner.
I am a stepmother and I would have not married my DH if I was treated like the 1950's secretary who buys the gifts for the boss.
I told him I already sent the gift and put my name on it, just to see what he would say. He said, okay and he doesn't know why I didn't put whatever I wanted on it. He never said my name couldn't be on it I just made a assumption. It is his daughters mother who is going to have a cow when it comes in the mail. I'm afraid she won't let her have the gift. Oh and my fiance was listening to his mom telling him to not involve me when it comes to his kids. I told him either he acts like I'm a part of his life or I won't be. Now he has changed and he won't go anywhere I'm not allowed to go. I've stayed with him because I love him. I feel bad because he is going to have to hear it from his mom and everyone else.
I finally wrote a letter to my soon to be step-daughter. She lives 3 hours away from us and really hasn't visited us too much since my FI and I started dating. We don't have a bad relationship. We just don't have any relationship. She is busy doing teenager stuff and dose not want to leave her friends even to visit with her dad (I have some beef with that, but I let it go).
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My husband treats his daughter (12) and my daughter (soon to be 14) different. Don't get me wrong, he loves my daughter like his own, but it seems that everything she does or says is wrong to him! When it's just me and my daughter, she comes out of her room, laughs and jokes with me, when he's there, she stays in her room 95% of the time because I know she just doesn't want to get in trouble by him! What usually happens is the 2 girls will do the exact same thing, and my daughter gets in trouble and he doesn't say a word to his daughter.
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