Feel free not to read this, I just need to vent.
My sister and I are so different its amazing we had the same two parents... I gave our Dad a gift for Christmas from the both of us, she said she'd mail me the money. Well 6 months later, no $. I've reminded her about it, asked her point blankly and always told "yup I'll send it" I know that its my fault for offering to spot her, etc and its not about the money really its about the prinicple. Well today she sends me a picture of her climbing w/ friends out in the desert (told you we are different) she called to chat, I was nice for a bit, and then asked "so have you sent me anything" Her response "Oh no, I'm not working for the next month so I don't have much money" SO I told her in a nice tone that I'm sure over the past 5 months she's had $40 to send me, but has chosen not to. I'm sure she had to pay for gas to go climbing, has bought beer, etc but I see where I fall on her priority list.. She was all like, oh that's not true, but I told her I am insulted that she just can't send me the money. I told her I'm never doing it again, and shes on her own moving forward. Maybe just once I won't send her a birthday card and she'll she how it feels that you are forgotten, I've kept this front for too long w /my parents that she contributes to stuff for them. No more...
Thanks for reading this, I just needed to get it off my chest
Re: I need to vent about my Sister
Ditto. If she can go out and have beers, then she can give you $$.
My siblings and I always pitched in for gifts but after DH and I were footing most of these gifts, I stopped.
Great job telling her.
I don't think you should front her anymore money, but if it were me, I'd still send a birthday card to her, keep up the relationship but don't aid her if you KWIM?
I'm glad you finally told her. I'm with Christina - I would still send her a card, but stop fronting the $.
This.
Dude, I've said it before and I'll say it again, but it is not your job to be the adult in this relationship. She is your sister, not your kid. I'm proud of you for speaking up - at this point, I'd let it go and not bring it up again. Money can do ugly things, and she'll just think you're pi$$ed about the $40, not the principle of the situation.
From now on, don't cover for her and let her figure out how to be an adult. She'll grow up eventually, or not...but you're her sister...so be her sister, send her a bday card because that's what sisters do. But it's not your job to cover for her for gifts, etc.
I bet you feel both icky and better at the same time for getting this off your chest to her.