March 2009 Weddings
Dear Community,

Our tech team has launched updates to The Nest today. As a result of these updates, members of the Nest Community will need to change their password in order to continue participating in the community. In addition, The Nest community member's avatars will be replaced with generic default avatars. If you wish to revert to your original avatar, you will need to re-upload it via The Nest.

If you have questions about this, please email help@theknot.com.

Thank you.

Note: This only affects The Nest's community members and will not affect members on The Bump or The Knot.

Grr. Just another family vent.

If you're sick of hearing my family vents, feel free to ignore.

I'm SO flipping sick of my sisters attitude toward our mother, her MIL, her family, herself, everything. Her attitude just plain f*cking sucks lately and I'm done with it. I have asked her to speak to someone- which she has and does on occasion (as well as to talk things out w our mother) but her "it doesn't matter any way" attitude is really f&cking pissing me off. 

MH and I had an idea to potentially host a mother's day brunch or bbq at our house because every restaurant is either a) booked or b) crazy expensive. Maybe have my mom (and dad if he's not working), MIL & FIL, (or maybe we see them in the evening) and my sister & family. I was even contemplating inviting my sisters ILs so that she could bang that out also, but didn't mention that to her (see reason below).  

Well I call my mother and she is fine with that idea. I call my sister and immediately she says "I'd rather not lunch so I can put kid # 2 for a nap" OK, fine. But then goes on to say how she doesn't want to do anything, not see our mother, her MIL, etc. The other night I told her to do WHAT SHE WANTS TO DO, but does she listen? No. She's the martyr and will go on to do what she doesn't want to do. Whatever!!!! So before I had the chance to even mention the whole hey do you want me to include your ILs, I got the "you know just plan accordingly and we may be there, we may not (way to let me plan accordingly). bla bla bla" 

I'm just flipping annoyed at her attitude and the what is coming across as ungratefulness. 

As a side, My mother kind of slipped the other day that I they are *now* planning a small afternoon tea for me ("oh you, me, your sister, MIL, and..um a couple other people...your sister did the evite" way to go mom...since you know i think my sister wanted it to be a surprise). Quite frankly, I DON'T want them to. Since you know, it was arranged AFTER I said something.  Sorry...while I am annoyed, I am just going to let that one go also.

I very well may DD this. I just needed to get it out. 

Warning No formatter is installed for the format bbhtml

Re: Grr. Just another family vent.

  • Aww I'm so sorry. what the heck is up with your sister? Why is she acting like this? I just don't understand her statement "we may or may not be there." Who says that? We're talking about your own sister for Petes sake. Ughh that would really piss me off. So, how do u plan accordingly? I mean do u have the brunch and invite her MIL? Do u talk to her MIL just in case your sister doesn't show up? How crazy! Try not to get yourself to worked up though. You don't need that stress in your life.
    imageLilypie Second Birthday tickers Daisypath Anniversary tickers
  • imageCutiepie811:
    Aww I'm so sorry. what the heck is up with your sister? Why is she acting like this? I just don't understand her statement "we may or may not be there." Who says that? We're talking about your own sister for Petes sake. Ughh that would really piss me off. So, how do u plan accordingly? I mean do u have the brunch and invite her MIL? Do u talk to her MIL just in case your sister doesn't show up? How crazy! Try not to get yourself to worked up though. You don't need that stress in your life.

    That's what set me off!  I am definitely NOT going to call her IL's at this point- I want to actually call my dad maybe tomorrow to get a voice of reason. MH is kind of like...At some point you need to stop giving/offering/etc. I will give her until tomorrow, call and let her know she should do what she wants to do. I am patient usually...but I have just had it.

    I am really starting to think the combination of my sister/mother's relationship currently and my sisters negativity has a big part to do with my sadness I've been feeling lately.

     

    Warning No formatter is installed for the format bbhtml
  • I think I would be pretty upset with her, but I'd like to say that you will go ahead and plan accordingly then. You'll just plan on her not being there.

    Maybe she wants to spend Mother's Day with her family, or there are tentative plans with the IL's, and her negativity just over-road any kind of normal way of saying this.

  • imageiheartcutepuppies:

    imageCutiepie811:
    Aww I'm so sorry. what the heck is up with your sister? Why is she acting like this? I just don't understand her statement "we may or may not be there." Who says that? We're talking about your own sister for Petes sake. Ughh that would really piss me off. So, how do u plan accordingly? I mean do u have the brunch and invite her MIL? Do u talk to her MIL just in case your sister doesn't show up? How crazy! Try not to get yourself to worked up though. You don't need that stress in your life.

    That's what set me off!  I am definitely NOT going to call her IL's at this point- I want to actually call my dad maybe tomorrow to get a voice of reason. MH is kind of like...At some point you need to stop giving/offering/etc. I will give her until tomorrow, call and let her know she should do what she wants to do. I am patient usually...but I have just had it.

    I am really starting to think the combination of my sister/mother's relationship currently and my sisters negativity has a big part to do with my sadness I've been feeling lately.

     

    I think J is right, there really is a point when you have to stop.  I really don't know what she was thinking.

  • Dealing with family sucks sometimes and I hate that you are having to deal with this right now when this is supposed to be a time when your family celebrates YOU!  As much as you don't want to I think there comes a point when you have to distance yourself from the negativity and the people who cause it.  I've had to be that way with my brother/sil too and I hate it.

    I would also agree that you are right that this is probably part of the reason why you are feeling so sad lately and top it off with all the changes in your body.

    Has your sister always been this way or do you think there is something in her life that is causing it?  Has she always had a volatile relationship with your mom as well?

    image

    PCOS and Endo

    Ovarian drilling and endo removed 1/3/12
    BFP - 3/27/12
    Beta's 11, 14, 57, 637, 2800
    Sono showed no baby and teeny tiny sac. Waiting to M/C naturally.

  • You know, as much as I agree with the idea J said about not offering, but unfortunately, it won't take away the bitter feeling. Basically it just sucks. I'm sorry. Sad
    Warning No formatter is installed for the format bbhtml
  • I really can't stand people who act like their being put out when you're trying to do something nice for them. I just don't get it.
Sign In or Register to comment.
Choose Another Board
Search Boards