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Coworker's husband died

I pretty much work independently, but have one coworker who I occassionally work closely with.  She is in her 60's, I am in my 20's, but we're fairly close.  Her husband died this week - unexpectedly.

I sent a quick email response (she told me in email) saying that I was so sorry and asked her to let me know if there was anything I could do.

What should I do?  I've never been in this situation before.  Send flowers?  Make food?  I don't know where she lives to send anything, and don't want to obnoxiously send emails.  I'm at a loss, but want to acknowledge it.

IUI - BFP! Baby boy born still - August 2012
IVF - BFP - miscarriage June 2013
FET - BFN
FET - BFN
Switched clinics
IVF with PGD - three embryos created, all healthy - July 2014
FET - transferred two embryos (boy and girl) - Nov 2014 - BFP!
Baby Boy born July 2015

Re: Coworker's husband died

  • Does anyone else that you work with have her address?  You could try to look up his obituary and see if they would like donations sent to a specific organization, or at the very least it will list what funeral home is in charge of the arrangements and you could have flowers sent there.
  • I would be very surprised if your company/dept isn't going in on something for her. You may want to contact HR or your supervisor to see what's going on.
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  • imageDr.Loretta:
    I would be very surprised if your company/dept isn't going in on something for her. You may want to contact HR or your supervisor to see what's going on.

     

    Our department is sending flowers (I found out after posting).  I still want to do something, though, as we are coworker/friends too.  I did get her address and will send a card.  I may make muffins or a casserole as well.

    IUI - BFP! Baby boy born still - August 2012
    IVF - BFP - miscarriage June 2013
    FET - BFN
    FET - BFN
    Switched clinics
    IVF with PGD - three embryos created, all healthy - July 2014
    FET - transferred two embryos (boy and girl) - Nov 2014 - BFP!
    Baby Boy born July 2015

  • When my grandfather passed away, the best thing for my grandmother was that people made and brought over food. She didn't have to cook for a week, and honestly, it's one of the last things on your mind to do.. and when the hunger finally does strike you don't have to urge to cook, even though you know you need to eat.

    I think she also received a fruit basket, which was nice as well. Maybe someone that you work with could give you an idea of what would be best for her and her circumstances. Food worked well with my grandmother because my grandfather did most of the cooking.

  • When my dad passed away several co-workers sent sympathy cards in the mail which I found very thoughtful. My department got together and sent a gift basket full of comfort food which I also appreciated.

    I would send her a card and write a genuine message expressing how sorry you are.

  • imageDr.Loretta:
    I would be very surprised if your company/dept isn't going in on something for her. You may want to contact HR or your supervisor to see what's going on.
    This- HR will have her address. We mailed a get well card to a co-worker recently who had heart surgery. Flowers are also appropriate, although she might be getting plenty of those. A simple card sent through HR would be enough.
    image
    Lachlan
    born March 2012
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