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Suggestions for Snoring? (Long)
Hi all! I'm new over here, but this snoring problem has been an issue for the past several months and thought maybe some of you have been through this before and have suggestions.
DH snores. Loud. I have to be asleep before him otherwise forget sleeping at all. I'm a light sleeper (as I think most moms tend to be) plus I wake up several times during the night. So it's really hard for me to get a good night sleep next to DH. This has only occurred over the past few months, DH never used to snore. He says he thinks it's due to his weight gain. So I told him a couple months ago that he needs to either start hitting the gym, or call a doctor.
Since then, I bought him a mouth guard thing, it doesn't work. I've tried ear plugs, but everytime I use them I get an ear infection and wind up sick. Still, he has yet to exercise one day or call a doctor (and refuses to let me call for him). Now that I'm pregnant, the fatigue of first trimester has hit hard and I can't go without sleep (work full time and I'm in school). So lately DH has been sleeping on the couch, which I am very grateful for and thank him all the time. I offer to switch off nights with him and he says no. However he's so grumpy because he doesn't sleep well out there, that his overall attitude has changed and I feel like he's constantly upset with me because he's overtired all the time.
Anyways, any suggestions for what to do? I know he doesn't snore on purpose. We're newly weds sleeping in different rooms and it's causing tension in the marriage, but I don't know what else I can do if he refuses to make an effort to change the situation.
***Thanks for reading my long post!
Re: Suggestions for Snoring? (Long)
Has he been tested for sleep apnea? Is he overweight at all?
ETA - sorry I didn't see your mention of his weight gain. Losing weight will definitely help, but I'd also look into seeing a doctor, he might have sleep apnea.
Step 1: ignore him and make drs appointment for him. Tell him to go otherwise he will continue sleeping on the couch.
Step 2: Remove at least 1 of redundant tickers.
Step 3: sleep peacefully.
We're kind of going out.
I'd say you can't force him to take care of himself, if he isn't already doing that. Was he ever good at taking care of himself in your relationship history? Did he routinely see the doctor, eat healthy and exercise?
He needs to have a sleep study, or two, depending on the facility. Untreated obstructive sleep apnea makes it very difficult to lose weight. He will have to first treat the OSA, then lose the weight. The eventual weight loss may or may not help minimize the apnea.
If you have questions you can PM me. I'm not a nurse or a dr, but I worked for a few years at a sleep disorder clinic.
My FI snores. I was unable to sleep with him due to his snoring - I occupied the couch for almost a year. He had been going to an ENT who authorized a sleep study, but FI wouldn't make the time to go. This was really getting to me...I was angry that my quality of sleep was not important enough to take care of this.
One night, I came to bed in the hopes of getting some sleep. That was when I noticed that he was experiencing periods of time when he was not breathing. I timed a couple of them and then prayed that he would be alive to discuss it in the morning. Fortunately he was and I let him know exactly how bad his snoring had become. He made an appointment that day and went in for a sleep study.
He obviously had sleep apnea and was given a second sleep study to see if a CPAP machine would help. My FI came home ecstatic -- it was the best night of sleep he had gotten in years! He felt absolutely different - well-rested and happier. He drinks less coffee now because he doesn't need the caffeine.
We got a CPAP machine and our sleeping life has radically improved. The machine itself is small and sits on the nightstand. It is made up of two parts: one to blow room air in and one to hold distilled water to humidify the air. The whole thing is less than 12 inches long. It is about 4 inches tall and 6 inches wide. It makes less noise than a fan. And because the noise is constant, I have no problem blocking it out. FI doesn't have a problem sleeping with the mask on. I sleep better and so does he.
Read this post to your husband and tell him that 1.) a sleep study isn't scary 2.) the CPAP machine (should he need one) will make him sleep so much better and 3.) it will make sleeping a more pleasant experience for both of you.
He needs to see a doctor for this. A now ex from the very distant past snored something horrible, was heavy gained weight. I have since learned that years later - about 3 years. He finally went. I told him he had apnea. It was discovered in his sleep study that he stopped breathing so often during the night. He now has a machine, which took weeks to get via his medical insurance.
He will actually feel better (my ex said he did) because he was getting a solid night of sleep... and breathing all night.
We've found that the only thing that helps my H's snoring is him losing weight.
Otherwise, he just gets a lot of jabs in the side (full force, imoan don't play!) all night long.
Currently Reading: Don Quixote by Miguel De Cervantes
This, except substitute imoans SN for mine. This makes his sleep quality worse, but mine is much better.
I have no helpful advice. You can beg him till your blue in the face to see a doctor but it won't do any good unless he is ready.
This is a subject I can relate to! My H snores terribly. We often sleep separately because I also am a very light sleeper and wake up through the night.
When we sleep together, I do have one of those noise machines. To be honest, my H is such a bad snorer that it doesn't really help much but I had an ex who also snored and that machine was enough to help me sleep through his snoring. So depending on how bad your H is you might want to look into that.
I will say that my uncle was diagnosed with sleep apnea and also got the CPAP machine and he and my aunt say it saved their marriage and transformed the quality of his sleep.
He may not have sleep apnea (not all snorers do) but you should encourage him to look into that. It will improve the quality of life for BOTH of you.
Another ditto on this.
I was suspicious of sleep apnea based on how he sounded at night, but he didn't want to go in for a sleep study. The symptoms (both the snoring and the gaps in breathing) cleared up when he lost weight, so I stopped bugging him about it. I'm pretty sure either can cause the other, and correcting either often reversing the other.
He still snores a bit, particularly when he is sick or his allergies are bad. In the short term, waking him up and having him sleep on his side help, though within an hour or two he will have flopped onto his back again.
@jdpegasus - you'd have to ask your insurance carrier. Most plans cover a sleep study, with just your copay/deductible out of pocket. I'd call and see what your plan covers.
You don't have to go to an ENT. Your primary physician can refer you.