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Moms who prefer to wait for ear piercing

Maddie?s 2 bff?s both have their ears pierced and have had them that way since they were babies.  Maddie is starting to notice girls her age who have earrings and I foresee her asking for them soon.  (We were in a restaurant bathroom over the weekend and this cute girl around age 5 or 6 came up next to us to wash her hands and M said, ?Hi.  I love your earrings!!? to her.  And then she sort of looked at me, cocked her head, but didn?t ask anything.  I could tell she was wondering why she doesn?t have them.

 

I am flexible on when she gets them but I?m not sure her dad is on board for it until she is in Jr. high.

 

So if you are like-minded, what do you tell or plan to tell your daughter about why she can?t have earrings yet?  I don?t  want to imply there is anything wrong with the other girls having them because I really couldn?t care less and don?t have a judgment about it.  I even see some of the positives about doing it as an infant rather than later.

"If you can't say something nice, shut the hell up!"
- Paula Deen to 104.1 KRBE's Producer Eric 9/17/2011

Re: Moms who prefer to wait for ear piercing

  • DD has never noticed them on other kids (although none of her friends have pierced ears), but I will tell her she can have earrings when she can clean them and take care of them by herself.

    I also personally think that "real" jewelry like that (as opposed to plastic dress up stuff) is for older kids and adults, so I'll tell her that too if she needs another reason.

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  • Abbie wanted earrings forever. I told her she had to wait until her 6th birthday.  I caved after her Kindergarten graduation (she was 5 1/2).  My Step Dad bought it for her at Sweet and Sassy as a "graduation" gift.

    She has had them for a year and she cleans them, takes the earrings out at night and puts them back in in the morning herself.  She always comes and tells me if they hurt and she thinks they are infected, etc.  I knew she was able to be resposible enough for them, so that's why we did it.

    I would not have done it if I thought she would lose the earrings, not be able to clean them herself, etc.

    Instead of giving her a reason not to, I gave her a time when she could have them.  That always works better for Abbie.  "Mom, Mary has her ears pierced, why can't I?"  "You can when you turn 6 - won't that be great!." "Mom, everyone in my class has hair feathers, why don't I?" "We will get them in the summer, isn't that exciting!"  etc.

    Abbie Rose 9.26.2004
    Collin Thayne 10.11.2010
    image
  • imageTexasSmith:

    DD has never noticed them on other kids (although none of her friends have pierced ears), but I will tell her she can have earrings when she can clean them and take care of them by herself.

    I also personally think that "real" jewelry like that (as opposed to plastic dress up stuff) is for older kids and adults, so I'll tell her that too if she needs another reason.

    This is the reason I would give (to my fictitious daughter) but that said, I'd be ok with her getting her ears pierced at 5 or 6.  My nieces got theirs done then (as a reward for reaching a particular milestone for each of them) and they were very good about taking care of themselves.  If your DH is really adamant about waiting until she's a teen/pre-teen then I think you need to talk to him about his reasoning because "take care of them herself" ain't gonna cut it until then. 

    My big boy is bounding towards 3! Hoping to add a sibling. image Hipster dog is not impressed.
  • I'll probably just say something along the lines of "I was 10 when I got mine pierced, so that's how old you'll have to be to get yours done. Family rule!"
    image
  • imageTexasSmith:

    I will tell her she can have earrings when she can clean them and take care of them by herself.

    This.  I would never get G's done as an infant because I think it's something kids should want, not that their parents just do to them (JMHO! i dont' care what other people do), so she will have to be old enough to ask for them and responsible enough to at least help me with doing the solution on them and all that.

     

  • imagepook:
    imageTexasSmith:

    I will tell her she can have earrings when she can clean them and take care of them by herself.

    This.  I would never get G's done as an infant because I think it's something kids should want, not that their parents just do to them (JMHO! i dont' care what other people do), so she will have to be old enough to ask for them and responsible enough to at least help me with doing the solution on them and all that.

     

    Same rules for my Georgia. It seems like a rite of passage to me, and something she should be old enough to appreciate. No definite age in mind, but my thoughts are in the 7 - 10 range.

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  • imagelilygirl:
    imagepook:
    imageTexasSmith:

    I will tell her she can have earrings when she can clean them and take care of them by herself.

    This.  I would never get G's done as an infant because I think it's something kids should want, not that their parents just do to them (JMHO! i dont' care what other people do), so she will have to be old enough to ask for them and responsible enough to at least help me with doing the solution on them and all that.

     

    Same rules for my Georgia. It seems like a rite of passage to me, and something she should be old enough to appreciate. No definite age in mind, but my thoughts are in the 7 - 10 range.

    and something that she also earns...good report cards an entire year, etc. I got mine for stopping biting my nails.

    image
  • I had to wait until I was 16.  My mom didn't get hers until she was in college (around 20, I think), so that was the reasoning we got growing up along with "because I said so".  I also remember her specifically saying that earrings were too "racy" for young girls/teens.  I know, weird! 

    ETA:  If we had a girl, I don't think I would necessarily make her wait that long.  I would say 7-10 would be good (IF she wanted them done) and also make it in connection with a positive milestone.

  • My sister and I both had to wait until we were 13 (her) and 11 (me) to get them. My mom's take on it, was like previous posters have said, that its a "big kid"/adult thing and you have to be old enough and responsible enough to care for them properly. I was a little bummed and asked often when I could get them pierced but since I had waited so long and wanted them so much, boy, you better believe I took care of them well. I like the idea of it being "merit based" also...but the "in our family, we wait until you are at least 10" rule is gonna be the plan for us. :)

    BabyFruit Ticker
  • DH's family is very pro-infant-piercings, I am in the "rite of passage" school of thought.  I'm afraid to let MIL babysit any baby girls we may have.  She'll take them for an afternoon & then bring them back baptized Catholic with pierced ears.

    Daisypath Vacation tickers
  • imagehalfpintaggie:

    DH's family is very pro-infant-piercings, I am in the "rite of passage" school of thought.  I'm afraid to let MIL babysit any baby girls we may have.  She'll take them for an afternoon & then bring them back baptized Catholic with pierced ears.

    That happened to my sister, not the ear piercing part though.  LOL  

    My big boy is bounding towards 3! Hoping to add a sibling. image Hipster dog is not impressed.
  • I guess I haven't really thought about it... I have no idea when/if we'll get L's ears pierced.

    My sisters and I had our ears pierced at the same time... I'd guess we were 4 (me), 3, and a teeny baby.

  • imageSuzi-G-:
    imagehalfpintaggie:

    DH's family is very pro-infant-piercings, I am in the "rite of passage" school of thought.  I'm afraid to let MIL babysit any baby girls we may have.  She'll take them for an afternoon & then bring them back baptized Catholic with pierced ears.

    That happened to my sister, not the ear piercing part though.  LOL  

    please tell me there is not a priest that would actually do this.

    i wouldnt put either past your MIL to at least try, halfpint 

    Pregnancy Ticker
  • imagecamo_bride:
    imageSuzi-G-:
    imagehalfpintaggie:

    DH's family is very pro-infant-piercings, I am in the "rite of passage" school of thought.  I'm afraid to let MIL babysit any baby girls we may have.  She'll take them for an afternoon & then bring them back baptized Catholic with pierced ears.

    That happened to my sister, not the ear piercing part though.  LOL  

    please tell me there is not a priest that would actually do this.

    i wouldnt put either past your MIL to at least try, halfpint 

    They are supposed to take a class.  

    imageBaby Birthday Ticker Ticker Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
  • Carebear - that is hilarious.

     

    Thanks for all the ideas ladies.  M hates to brush her own teeth.  DH and I have to brush them every morning.  When she finally asks me if she can have her ears pierced if she is not brushing her teeth every morning/evening without prompting, I will use that as the incentive - "6 straight months of brushing your teeth every morning and night and you can get your ears pierced, because you'll need to clean them yourself each morning and night too."

    I think DH might get on board with that one.  But he might throw in brushing her own hair as well, lol.

    "If you can't say something nice, shut the hell up!"
    - Paula Deen to 104.1 KRBE's Producer Eric 9/17/2011
  • Amelia asked and I told her when she's 7.  That's when I had mine done and that's what I'm sticking to...for now.  I might let her when she turns 5, but not until then. 
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