September 2008 Weddings
xojo1
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Dear Community,
Our tech team has launched updates to The Nest today. As a result of these updates, members of the Nest Community will need to change their password in order to continue participating in the community. In addition, The Nest community member's avatars will be replaced with generic default avatars. If you wish to revert to your original avatar, you will need to re-upload it via The Nest.
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Note: This only affects The Nest's community members and will not affect members on The Bump or The Knot.
Our tech team has launched updates to The Nest today. As a result of these updates, members of the Nest Community will need to change their password in order to continue participating in the community. In addition, The Nest community member's avatars will be replaced with generic default avatars. If you wish to revert to your original avatar, you will need to re-upload it via The Nest.
If you have questions about this, please email help@theknot.com.
Thank you.
Note: This only affects The Nest's community members and will not affect members on The Bump or The Knot.
BC: Somethign Borrowed: Love vs. Friendship
Under what circumstances if it justified to choose love over friendship? How important is it for women to stick together? Have you ever been in a friendship like Darcy and Rachel's?
Re: BC: Somethign Borrowed: Love vs. Friendship
Under what circumstances if it justified to choose love over friendship? Well, I would say that if you really love someone and a friend doesn't approve they should speak their peace, but still support you. If they just can't witness the relationship and stick by you, then they aren't a good friend. Of course this goes out the window if there was any kind of abuse. Also, if they end up being right in the end and you lose the love, they should be there with Ben & Jerry's to pick up the pieces and not just say, "I told you so".
How important is it for women to stick together? It depends on the dynamics of the relationship. When it isn't a healthy relationship like Darcy and Rachel's I don't think it's important for women to stick together. Rachel had a better relationship with a man (Ethan) in this case and that's alright to. I also don't feel that just because you've known someone from childhood and were best friends growing up, that you need to remain close. People do change. I don't think Darcy ever changed, she was always a snob.
Have you ever been in a friendship like Darcy and Rachel's? Yes. I actually commented on that in the first BC post below. I was Rachel in the relationship and my ex-BFF was Darcy. I didn't realize how completely bad I was being walked all over until the frienship was over. Yet, a part of me can't help but miss her. It's so odd. This book brought up a lot of memories from that relationship of mine and it makes me a bit sad all over again. How can I still mourn a friendship that wasn't good for me?! It's crazy.
Under what circumstances if it justified to choose love over friendship? I'm of the opinion that I should have to choose love over a friendship. If the person I love truly comes in the way of a friendship or the real friend truly comes in the way of the person I love, then there is something else going on that needs to be examined. Either the love isn't real or the friendship isn't. In this case, I think it's a bit of both.
How important is it for women to stick together? I believe that you shouldn't date your friends exes or your exes friends - if you value and want to keep those friendships. So, if your bff is really important to you, then you need to stick together on the important stuff.
Have you ever been in a friendship like Darcy and Rachel's? I kind of mentioned this in another question, but yes I was in a one sided friendship in high school. We're no longer really friends. I don't think it would have evolved much if we were so I'm glad.
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Under what circumstances is it justified to choose love over friendship? Hmm, well if the friendship is a bad one, as was Rachel's and Darcy's then love will prevail! If you had a true and meaningful relationship then there should be no issue with having to choose.
How important is it for women to stick together? I don't think women "have" to stick together but I think friendships are extremely important.
Have you ever been in a friendship like Darcy and Rachel's? Not really.
CRAFTY ME
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Under what circumstances is it justified to choose love over friendship? I don't know this is a tough question, if you love someone your friend is with you kind of have to back off especially if you never expressed your interest in the first place.
How important is it for women to stick together? I don't necessarily think women have to stick together because it can be very hard to be friends with women but I think you should value any friendship you have.
Have you ever been in a friendship like Darcy and Rachel's? Not to that extreme, I've been in some one-sided friendships but they never last long.
Books read in 2011: 111
Books read in 2012: 100
my read shelf:
Very interesting take on these questions.
CRAFTY ME
my read shelf:
Under what circumstances if it justified to choose love over friendship? How important is it for women to stick together? Have you ever been in a friendship like Darcy and Rachel's?
I think that love should be chosen over friendship only when the friendship is a strong loyal bond that is not abusive, for lack of a better word. I feel that if a friend will make you choose between them and someone you fell in love with then they aren't truly a friend. In Darcy and Rachel's situation, I feel that if Rachel thought Darcy was a truly good friend then she would have stopped hooking up with Dex until he did something about his relationship with Darcy.
When it is a true friendship it is important for women to stick together. I feel that you can't help who you fall in love with and if the bond with your friend is strong then you and the friendship will survive.
I have not been in a relationship like Darcy and Rachel's or at least I cannot remember if I was. I have been blessed with great friends and the ones that I lost are the ones I don't need.