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Moms and moms to be, I need baby help.

E, my charge, is nine months old. He's not sleeping through the night at all. I mean, he's waking up at least 4 times a night. During the day naps might last 30 mins if we're lucky and he takes one in the morn and one in the afternoon. The parents are at their end with this whole sleeping thing. I've worked with babies this age before and they've all slept, NBD. The parents tried to let him CIO one night and I'm told he was standing in the crib the whole time and at 30 mins he was literally gasping for air he was crying so hard.

He does this thing where he sits up almost immediately upon waking, its almost creepy how quick he sits up when he wakes, and then he stands up. Once he does that it's really hard to get him back to sleep.

he never falls asleep in the pack and play or in the crib, he falls asleep in the rocker or on the couch in a lap and then we lay him down. He eats well and drinks enough a day, no potty problems. We're starting to transition him to table food. I can't think of any other background info you might need.

The dad is ready to let him cry all night, but the mom and i think because of the way he sits when he wakes and never goes to sleep on his own, he'll never lay down, he'll just stand there and scream. So, WWYD? Any advice or ideas would be great!

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Re: Moms and moms to be, I need baby help.

  • I'm in the CIO camp at night, and I wouldn't want to let him get more used to falling asleep outside of the crib/packnplay. 

    Is he teething?  Maybe a little tylenol before putting him down would be in order if he is.

  • He is teething, but it hasn't seemed to bother him that bad yet. He does this weird freak out thing when his teeth are hurting him (I know that sounds crazy, but we know it's his teeth when he does this certain thing) and we give him Tylenol then. As for the falling asleep in the pnp or crib, how do we do that? This is where we're stumped, how do we teach him to fall asleep on his own and not stand up?
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  • I wanted to add that his pnp is in the same room that I HAVE to be in during the day. The mom's office is also his nursery, so we spend the day downstairs in the greatroom, the only room downstairs, so there's no where for me to go and hide when he takes a nap. I hope that makes sense.
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  • If he's getting to a point where he does a certain thing and you know for a fact it's his teeth at that point and you know he's teething, I'd consider giving him Tylenol BEFORE he gets there.  Tylenol takes a little while to take effect.  If he's comfortable and not in pain when you set him down for a nap or sleeping, it may help.

    As far as the room set-up, definitely not ideal for an in-home situation.  At daycare, the kids are used to napping in cribs with their care-takers in the same room and other kids crying/sleeping around them, they still nap.  It's about setting a routine and sticking with it.  Good luck!

  • Does he have a pacifier...or is the mom against them?

    Does he get a bottle/milk before nap/bedtime?  Not in his crib, but prior to?

  • He does get a pacifier, but sometimes he doesn't need or want it. His sleeping pattern doesn't change when he has one. His last bottle is usually when he falls asleep at night. So he eats dinner, takes a bath, and then has a last bottle and falls asleep while drinking it every night.
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  • That's really tough :(

    I could never do CIO myself, it just didn't mesh with my parenting style, plus B would have reacted just like your charge - he'd get so upset that he would get sick.

    What worked for us was having a set routine.  That way B knew what to expect.  We never really battled with the nap issue since he was in daycare, but at night we'd do dinner, play time, bath time, jammies, 3 books, I'd rock him for 10 minutes and play lullabies, then lay him down.  Usually by that time he was drowsy so I'd lay him down and rub/pat his back until he fell asleep.

    Maybe getting into a set routine will help?

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  • Im not there at night, so this is just what they tell me, but Im pretty sure they have the night routine down, its the getting him to stay asleep that's the problem.  He falls asleep great with the bottle and they lay him in the crib, an hour later he's up and standing again and then repeat about every 3 hours. 

    All I know is that the parents are really getting drained.  I can tell that they're one their last nerve and then E is restless all day because he's not sleeping at night but he wont really nap well in the day.  We're all frustrated.  

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  • CIO wasn't an option for us either. My son honestly didnt STTN til 18 months though.... 

    I agree with Kristen with the routine. If that is in place, have a routine for wake ups too. If they are not feeding him at night, they might go in, reassure him and lay him down. Pat/sing/whatever for a few minutes. Nothing loud and no bright lights. Using the same words to reassure/soothe can work as an instant calm over time. If he has a music or sound machine that is calming, turn it on when they go in. Many babies like white noise. My son loved his light up seahorse. He would settle as soon as we turned it on.

    Is he wet? A lot of babies wake every time they pee and don't like the feeling.

    GL. I know how frustrating and exhausting it is to have a little one who doesn't sleep.  

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