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2nd Marriage
So... I know this doesn't apply to any of you but the dry wedding post made me want to share this with you as it's crossed my mind. You all know that unfortunately my marriage ended in divorce very quickly and how awful it's been but how muuuch better I am doing. That being said, if I'm ever blessed to fall in love with the right guy and enter into marriage again, as of now, I wouldn't want the full on wedding again. I think I'd opt for a destination wedding, preferably just hubs and I, but maaaybe just the closest family and best friends... like get married on a beach in Hawaii or a cruise ship in the Caribbean... nothing over the top, just toootally focus on him and I... not the details, the planning or the wedding, but to really focus on the marriage.
Hmm, just made me think.... do any of you know people who entered into 2nd marriages, what were those weddings like?
Re: 2nd Marriage
If I ever got remarried (or, hell, if I could ever go back and do ours again), I'd totally opt for a DW or just going to the JOP and having a party afterwards.
I don't know anyone on their second yet, but I totally agree with you - if I was doing it again it would, I'd be eloping and everyone would just get an annoucement later on.
Did you read the Conscious Bride book a bunch of us read before the wedding? One of the main points of the book was how modern traditions of wedding planning don't actually prepare the woman for the emotional shift to marriage - and that a lot of older civilizations did more to prepare them. I know that, and our precana stuff, gave us a basis to do some "focus on the marriage" stuff in conjunction with all the planning.
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When my dad remarried it was on the front porch of the house they just bought. My dad wore one of those shirts with the tux painted on and my step-mom had on white shorts and a white shirt with a cheap vail she made.
My mom and step-dad got married in a little chapel at my grandpa's church. Their reception was at a hotel, but it was really small. They couldn't really do a destination wedding becuase they each had 2 kids and they wanted all of us there.
We went to a wedding for a 4th marriage the month before our wedding and it was just like every other wedding we had been to. White dress, preacher, flowers, the whole nine and a full reception afterward.
My twin's mom and step dad got married in their living room though. I think it really depends on the people.
Steve and I plan to renew our vows in Vegas sometime around the 5th anniversary. I kind of want to be KU when we do it so we can have the whole shotgun Vegas ceremony experience.
the wedding | the blog
This made me giggle!
Me too!
No, I didn't read it. J and I got engaged about six months before we got married and between my mom and the planning, we didn't really focus on what it really meant to be "married," it was just like going with the motions and surviving... we also skimmed through premarital counseling (BIG MISTAKE)... anyway, just so much I would re-do about that process.....
We've talked about renewing our vows in Vegas someday too... although I'd prefer to not be KU!! I've never been to Vegas and I don't want to be KU while I'm there!
This is a topic that crosses my mind from time to time.
Not that I know what the future holds, but the mind still wanders. I feel like I really like how I did everything for my wedding and couldn't picture wanting to do it any other way. But, you can't re-use the old stuff. Well, you could, but that would be weird. I also feel like people might talk and think it's silly doing a shower or traditional wedding. I guess it would depend, too, on if the guy had been married before. Like you said though, the focus really needs to be on the marriage.
I don't think I've ever been to a wedding that's been a second wedding. Although, actually when my parents got married it was my dad's 2nd wedding. Also, my aunt and uncle (who have been married for 35+ years now) is actually a 2nd wedding for my uncle. Both of those weddings were traditional weddings. But, that was all before I was born even. I don't think I know very many people now who are on a second marriage.
A friend of mine got married recently and it was her 2nd. She got married in a park in a sundress with just her immediate family (and his) there.
My MIL is getting remarried (my FIL died 8 years ago). She is getting married in a backyard in a nice white dress.
If we were to ever do a vow renewal or if I ever had a second marriage for whatever reason, I would want a beach wedding. Not that I would change a thing about our wedding... the planning, the day, the dresses, flowers etc... I loved every piece of it! I just love the idea of walking barefoot on the beach at sunset... I would love a vow renewal just so we could do that!
I've been to a few 2nd weddings. One was my grandmother's, she got remarried about 9 years ago (my grandfather died when I was in 2nd grade). They had it in my aunt's living room around thanksgiving time because I was home from college and other family members were visiting. It was very nice and I know my grandmother liked having just family around her.
The other two were more traditional. One was my aunt and while it was her second wedding it was my uncle's first, so most was traditional, but the reception was in their (enormous) backyard with italian ice instead of cake! The other was FIL and step-MIL, again, most of it was very traditional even though both of them had already been married.
I think it varies person to person, to each their own!
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July 2019, 8 more years, our 10 year anniversaries. MY BEACH DAMNIT! GROUP VOW RENEWALS! Besides, Krissy... western beach sunsets kick 10x more as$
All of the second weddings I have been to have been traditional, but at the same time it was only the second wedding for one of the partners and the first for the other, which changes things.
If I could do it all over again, I would so elope. or have a smaller guest list.
Hugs to you, hon... none of us know what the future holds... none of us could have really imagined how life would turn out no matter what we do... it's just one day at a time... Hugs, prayers and Luv to you
TOTALLY agreed! I have to admit, I hope he doesn't want a big wedding... I think it's still emotional for me now and when it actually did happen, my emotions would be different, but right now, I can't imagine another big wedding.