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Advice neeed ....

kirkpatrick31kirkpatrick31
in Military Nesties
My boyfriend is coming home from a year long deployment in Afghanistan. I am So excited to see him! But I am also very nervous I am worried about sex. After being seperated for so long I wonder if it will all just be the same like it used to be. We are a very strong couple in everything else I am just scared I guess. I dont really want to have sex when he first comes home (like the same night) I would rather get to know eachother again. I am worried he wont understand this and might think its weird. am I just nervous? will this all change when I see him? I am just really confused. If anyone could shed some light or there opinion that would be nice :)
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Re: Advice neeed ....

  • meltoinemeltoine member
    Sixth Anniversary

    Yay for your BF coming home!

    Honestly, I would wait and see how you and he feel when he gets home. He will probably be exhausted from traveling and everything and may not be totally interested either. On the other hand, he may want to thrown down as soon as he walks in the door. You could feel either way too, once you actually see him. If you get the feeling that you're on two separate pages, tell him what you want and why you want it.  

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  • sweetface83sweetface83
    It felt awkward for us at first, but after a day or so that went away.  Just relax and see where it goes.  Everyone, as Meltoine said, is different.  He might want to just hang out or he may want to jump you right away.  As long as you are both being open and communicating your feelings to each other, you can work through it.
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  • CiciTenCiciTen
    MH and I had sex for the very first time (after 3.5 years of dating, what a trooper for waiting for me that long, lol!) literally the LAST weekend we saw each other before he deployed! Needless to say, at his homecoming I was really, really nervous about the sex because A) we were so not used to having it, and B) we'd been away from one another and had both experienced a lot of changes during that particular deployment. I felt similarly to you. I fretted for absolutely no reason, though, because once I saw him everything just kind of felt right again. We didn't put any pressure on "needing" to have sex that first night, but it did end up happening organically, and that was really nice. My advice is to just try not to put pressure on yourselves, and talk to him about how you're feeling! 
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  • iluvmytxrgriluvmytxrgr mod
    Moderator Ancient Membership 5000 Comments 5 Love Its
    I said in another post that we rarely make it home first.  We jump right back into it.  That being said, MH doesn't leave for a year at a time.  I think you should just see how it goes. 
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