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Working with family-DH doesn't like it
I work with my Mother in her Real Estate office. I am working towards my license, but over the last four years I have worked part time (10 hours) for her in her office. I often have to wait or ask for my paycheck. I give Mom a break because, if she doesn't get paid, she can't pay me. Recently we have started a little bit of property management. Since property management doesn't require a licensed Real Estate agent, I am in charge of this aspect of the business. So far I work 6 days a week at this. Anywhere between 20-55 hours a week. My cut of this part of the business is $200 a month ( 1/3 of the monthly fee our office recieves). It will be more once all spaces are rented, but it will not exceed $500 a month. I have told Mom that I would help her with this, but I barely bring home $450 a month working with her, and as I said before, it won't be much more. DH was irritated about my paycheck situation before this and now he's pushing me to demand more money or to back off on the property management because it's taking up a ton of my/our time for little to nothing in return. I feel an obligation to help my Mom and know that she's trying to get me out there so that when I do have my RE license, I can hit the ground running but this is taking a toll on my work and my home life. I don't know what to do. Any advice would help.
TIA
Re: Working with family-DH doesn't like it
I don't blame your H for a second.
Your loyalty needs to be with the financial success of your family- the one you created with your H, not your mom.
Unless we were already wealthy and it was for fun, I would be furious if my H was working anywhere between 30- 65 hours a week (the 10 hours in her office plus the 20-55) for $112. Do you realize that even on the low end of hours that is less than $4 a hour?
If he then had to ask for the check I would seriously flip.
Give your mom adequate notice and find a position that at least pays minimum wage.
Re-reading this, I see my people-pleasing tendancies loud and clear and the fact that I can't stand up for myself with my Mother. Is "DOORMAT" written on my forehead again?
At $200 a month, what is your hourly wage?
Be honest.
It's okay to help your mom for free. It's okay to do an unpaid internship to build your resume - with a start date and end date.
It's not okay to act like a paid employee and not get paid ... or to act as a partner and not get a cut of the partnership (or shoulder the burden during a lean month).
I think you are caught between an internship and employee and sorta-investor and need to define what the hell you are doing there, why, and for how much.
Or stop working there and get your credit hours someplace else.
I will bite and say absolutely!
I don't blame your DH. You are working a bunch of hours and only bringing in less than $500 per MONTH. That's less than minimum wage. How are you paying for childcare?
This is not working for you and your family. Request a liveable wage, do what you need to do in order to get licensed now, or find another job. I realize that you want to help your mom, but she is taking advantage of you by asking you to work for less than minimum wage. I really think your marriage and home life should come before your mother's business.
You don't have a job. You are helping your mom for free, essentially, helping her to build her business while ignoring the very real financial needs of your own family, that of you and your dh. I'd be furious if my dh was doing this, your dh has every right to be angry. "Working toward' your real estate license is a joke in this instance. If you were 'working toward' your license, you would not be playing at your mommy's property management set up, you'd be studying for your license.
You have indicated by how you set your schedule where your priorities are ,and they're not with your husband. Make your choices, and expect him to react accordingly.
How long have you been "working towards" your license? I hope not 4 years! It doesn't take that long to get your license. I understand there is something to be said from learning from an experienced realtor, but I don't know that you NEED to work for her for so cheap in order to get your license.
What if you weren't family? Would she still not pay you? Probably not. I have a feeling she's taking a certain level of advantage of you.
At a minimum, you need to talk to your mom about how thisisn't working. Not that you dont' want to work for her, but it has to be a more official set-up and you need a consistent paycheck. Will she work w/ you on this? Will she give you a decent salary?
~Benjamin Franklin
DS dx with celiac disease 5/28/10
There is no way in hell I would week 55 hours per week for $500 per month. If your mom hired someone who wasn't family to help with her business, do you think she would just not pay that person for their work? Sometimes, working with family can work out really well; often, however, it's a disaster.
How long does it take to get a real estate license? As someone else said, doing an unpaid internship to get started in your career is one thing, but this seems to be pretty open-ended, and once you do get your license, are you going to feel any less obligated to help your mom?
In any case, your husband's needs trump your mom's. The two of you need to decide what's best for your family without regard for what's best for your mom.