August 2010 Weddings
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My IL stress me out! long vent

A little back story. My MIL is an alcoholic, she goes spurts without drinking and then always relapses. She's a very high anxiety and has OCD. She is currently drinking (she says she can handle it now). She spinning so far out of control it is hard to watch the drama unfold on a weekly basis. Last week she drank a bottle of LIsterine. The week before that she was drinking and driving hit the curb and popped 2 of her tires. I was out to dinner with a friend when this happened and had the cars so DH had to ride his bike 7 miles to go help her. Since she was drunk he wouldn't get in the car with her so he had to ride back home in the dark.

Now to the most recent event. My SIL is graduation from college next weekend and they were going to throw her a party. FIL called yesterday and said MIL can't handle it right now so that party was cancled. So of coarse like any big brother, DH stepped up and said we would host it, which means I will organize, cook and clean for the party. Which falls two days after all my finals are over and the day before a 5 day camping trip. I don't really like planning big parties because I'm and over planner and I want everything to be well thought out. I know that stepping up to the plate on this one was the right thing to do because SIL deserves a party but I hate that the responsibilty falls on me when I'm already stress out about school.

The fact the MIL is out of control and is going to hurt if not kill herself. But that is a story for another post. I've never had to deal with alcohol abuse in my family and the whole topic is utterly overwhelming for me. DH was the parent child when he was growing up so now he just tries to remove himself from the situation and I over analysis everything.

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Re: My IL stress me out! long vent

  • Good for you and DH for stepping up to help out your SIL!

    Sorry about MIL, I can't say that I've dealt with that situation in real life, but I have seen a lot of episodes of Intervention. Just based on what I've seen there, there isn't much you can do for her if she isn't ready to quit, and drinking Listerine is pretty hard core. Has anyone in the family ever tried to have some sort of intervention or send her to rehab?

    Sending nesty vibes your way that you can throw a awesome party for SIL and not stress too much over it. And that MIL can realize what she's doing to herself and the family and get some help.

    BabyName Ticker
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  • Wow, so sorry you have to deal with this. I had alcoholics in my family and I really understand what your DH is going through.  The sad thing is, you really cannot do much if they do not want to change and take back control of their lives.  No amount of family intervention will help if they just decide that they can start drinking again and "control it". Sometimes what helps is a real tragedy - if she is drinking and driving, she really is asking for a wake up call.  When she was so drunk, did your DH let her keep driving once he helped her with the tires? Maybe you can take her car away? You may be saving someone's life this way.

    I am so sorry you have to go through this. My heart goes out to you and I am going to pray for you and your family. I hope she gets some help soon.

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