(Loooooooooooooong)
So H and I went to Baltimore this weekend for our friends' housewarming. We made decent time from NY to Baltimore. We hung out at the house for a little bit and then met up with H's cousins for dinner.
The cousins are a bit older than us and have two boys (10 and 8). It was a nice couple of hours with them. H doesn't know them that well because of 1) distance, 2) age difference and 3) weird Jewish family grudge crap. Nonetheless is was really nice spending time with them and getting to know them a bit more.
Then it was the party which was fun. We were staying at the house so the 4 of us were up until about 3am just talking and hanging out. The boys were downstairs in the "Wii room" and apparently H's best friend (known him since he was 12) started talking to H about his therapy and how bad things were in their relationship before he started going and got medicated. Supposedly H opened up to him about our problems though still made excuses about going to therapy. But he listened to the one person who just might be able to help him get over the therapy hump (seeing as how H and his BFF are pretty much the same person).
On the drive home last night H and I were talking about houses and actually considering looking. During the conversation H made some majoy observations about me and how I never bring anything up. When ever any thing was brough up conversationally with my parents (past and even now) my dad turns is into a huge confrontation - so that is my association with "bringing things up" so I don't. I realized that I do that to H and it's not fair to either of us and he deserves more credit than I give him. He also acknowledged to his BFF that he (H) is a big part of our problems even though he always tells me that it's all me.
All in all it was a good ride home with lots of talking and a warm happy feeling. And I'm going to start looking for houses (just looking for now, but who know what'll happen).
There was some serious sexytime last night. After 2 weeks... We both needed it.
Re: The weekend... Baltimore and revelations.
It sounds like a productive trip which is good. Sometimes you need that outside voice to get things to sink in.
That is so good to hear! It's a start. I know it'll probably take some more cajoling from people he respects- but you're getting there!
DH used to think that people who took anti-depressants or saw a therapist were "weak". He thought that you should be able to get over things on your own. Finally one day he looked around him and saw that people he really loved and respected were seeking help when they needed it. I think that was the final push for him to realize that you don't need to go through shyt alone. That you're not less of a man if you don't just bite down on a bullett and take the pain.
Currently Reading: Don Quixote by Miguel De Cervantes
Mr. imoan sounds a lot like H. Hopefully he'll continue to see the change in BFF and want the same.