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CW drama...a little long.
This co-worker of mine just turned 22 in June. She's getting married Labor Day to this guy she just met Memorial Day weekend. The guy is 39 years old, works at bar 5 nights a week (that's his only job), has 3 kids under the age of 14 (one is as young as 5) so he pays about 1500 a month in child support. And he doesn't own a home and doesn't own a car (in fact he lost his license due to DUI's).
Now - there's nothing wrong with working at a bar or not owning a home or a car - I went thru hard times too and yeah I understand the guy just doesn't make a lot of money.
Anyways, me and another co-worker (older lady) expressed to this girl that she should really think about this guy and does she really know him...his age difference is big one...is she ready to be a step mom...does he even want to have more kids (she might want them someday)...etc etc. Just basically saying, hey we're older then you, both been divorced and remarried so we're just looking out, a 20 yr age difference is pretty big. So this girl gets all dramatic and bitches my boss out (b/c he said something too, completely on a different day) and now she's not talking to me or the other lady.
So I googled her fiance one day (i'm nosey) and found that he has a warrant out for his arrest for contempt of court. I was friends with this girl and feel like she should know. Do I send her an email from an anon email? Do I tell her? My evil twin kinda wants to call the police (jk). We were friends and I feel like she should be aware that this guy is a loser...I mean, he has a warrant out for his arrest for crying out loud.
Last thing I want to do is cause more drama at my work place...should I butt out, or say something?
Re: CW drama...a little long.
Honestly, I would butt out.
To me work is work and not personal time. I would have never talked to a coworker that way about whoever she is with. I am a strong believer in personal life staying at home don't bring it to work.
It's not your place to tell this CW your feelings on her fiance. She may make a mistake, but she'll live and learn.
If you feel like you should report him to cops, go ahead.
None of it is really your business.
But if you did turn him in, who knows, he might miss their wedding due to being in jail. Just sayin'.
Katie Talks About...
If it were for some violent crime, I would contact the police directly. Otherwise, it's just one more thing that makes this guy bad news, but it sounds like she's ok with a lot of bad omens from this guy and is still willing to marry him.
Since she's a friend I think it's nice to express concern but if she shut you down immediately, there's nothing else you can do. If she reacted that strongly, she is probably thinking the same things herself and trying to ignore them, but in that case there's really nothing you can do. She'll have to live and learn.
The best you can do is if she lets you talk to her at all, just let her know you're there to listen if she ever wants to get things off her chest.