March 2009 Weddings
Dear Community,
Our tech team has launched updates to The Nest today. As a result of these updates, members of the Nest Community will need to change their password in order to continue participating in the community. In addition, The Nest community member's avatars will be replaced with generic default avatars. If you wish to revert to your original avatar, you will need to re-upload it via The Nest.
If you have questions about this, please email help@theknot.com.
Thank you.
Note: This only affects The Nest's community members and will not affect members on The Bump or The Knot.
Our tech team has launched updates to The Nest today. As a result of these updates, members of the Nest Community will need to change their password in order to continue participating in the community. In addition, The Nest community member's avatars will be replaced with generic default avatars. If you wish to revert to your original avatar, you will need to re-upload it via The Nest.
If you have questions about this, please email help@theknot.com.
Thank you.
Note: This only affects The Nest's community members and will not affect members on The Bump or The Knot.
need to vent
So I'm having a really hard time with switching to FF after BF. I just feel really guilty and horrible about making such a rash decision so quickly. Everyone says not to beat myself up about it, but I can't help feeling like this. Especially when she starts crying while I make her bottle. I feel so bad that before I could read her signs and just pop her on the boob. Now it's a process and she gets frustrated and anxious about getting her bottle. I have said multiple times that if I could go back and redo it, that I wouldn't have switched and I wish I could still BF her. Boo 
Re: need to vent
I still feel this way about BFing. We had to quit because of rapid weight loss and my supply.
I try to think of it this way--there is always success with baby #2 and things will get easier when Emily gets the hang of FF. Hang in there-it will get better.
Ali - I've been pumping due to this annoying infection since two weeks (we're now at 5 weeks). However, i felt the same guilt heating up a bottle of BM in the middle of the night when before I was able to just nurse her immediately. Bottles are a messy pain in the ass and the wailing at 3am made me even more stressed out and sad.
I use 100% formula for my middle of the night feeding because I don't have to heat it up, it can be room temperature.
What we decided to do is to have everything set up in the room - the water already in the bottle and the formula pre-measured. That way when she wakes up, I walk in the room dump the formula in the bottle, mix and feed. It takes me seconds rather than walking downstairs to make a bottle.
I'm not much help with the guilt, because I feel it as well. Our situations are completely different, but I think as a parent, you're going to feel guilty no matter what decisions you make in situations like these.
Don't beat yourself up over it. You're doing what's best for you and your daughter.
Hang in there...
Awwww, hang in there Mama! Everything gets easier with time!!
However, if you truly feel like you would prefer to bf, it's not necessarily too late. Many women have had success relactating. Here's some info:
http://www.kellymom.com/bf/supply/relactation.html
I remember watching an episode of Oprah not too long ago. There was a lady who had a miscarriage and then adopted. She kept latching the adopted baby onto her breast and eventually got milk. The baby was half bf, half ff. I thought that was absolutely amazing that our bodies can do that!!
Anyhow, everything at that newborn stage is a lot of figuring stuff out. She'll get the hang of the bottles soon... and you'll figure out a good routine for the both of you
This is the way we did it. Every night, I'd make bottles of water for that night and the next day. We have a Munchkin formula dispenser. It has 4 sections in it. Then, I had a few tiny bottles (2 oz) from the hospital that I had flat lids for. That gave us 7 servings of premeasured formula. That made things faster at bottle time.
Try not to feel guilty about this. There are so many decisions you have to make about your kids, and most of them (this one included) are choosing between multiple good things (BF/FF/EP/mix). There are pros and cons on all sides, but no reason to feel guilty about choosing any of those.
Sorry your having a hard time. I obviously don't know 100% of the feelings- so please please take what I say with a grain of salt.
As someone who chose to formula feed and obviously did her research that most say "breast is best," I will say my daughter has been developing, growing, and being a wonderful content happy baby. We choose what is best for us and the baby. At the beginning, everything is day by day. Getting through the day can be hard at first, so sometimes we make decisions quickly to ease whatever we're going through. Be proud you tried and were successful for a bit. Don't stress on the what could be's or what should have been.
You still can try to read signs of when she gets hungry. Is she moving her tongue around, pecking at you? If she starts doing that, prep the bottle. Will she take room temp? If so, leave a thermos of boiled (that's what I do for instance) room temp water, and fill the bottle up ahead of time. Then you just need to add formular- takes 2 seconds. I've become the master of doing it with A in one hand and prepping in another. Sure, it's not as easy as putting her on a boob; but you can do it. I know you can.
(((hugs))).
I think that we've all felt guilt about this at some point. I had a really hard time when I started supplementing. And now I feel guilty that I am in the weaning process. Emily is growing and healthy. That is what is most important!
Thanks ladies. We do pre-make dry bottles at night which does make it a little easier. I've also been pre-making formula during the day to keep in the fridge. It is getting a little easier. Yesterday we only had one meltdown and that was more because she spit up all over me and then freaked out that I put her down to clean up. I popped the paci in and she was fine.
I think having my parents here wasn't necessarily healthy for me in the decision making process because I was listening to my mom too much. Plus I was overwhelmed at the thought of pumping and having to build a supply up in such a short time since I'm going back to work so soon. But it is what it is. I think once she starts daycare and I can just send her off with the formula and pre-made bottles, then it'll be much easier since that was my big mental block over the whole thing.
I hate that there is such a huge learning curve to parenting. Where's my baby manual?!?
The Sand in My Snow Boots