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So mad... but without the guts to do anything about it.

Long story short - state and federal law requires my employer to provide me a private, non-bathroom place to pump breastmilk whenever I need to.

As it stands, I have to call the occupational nurse's office and ask if the exam room is free each time I want to use it. I have called the past 3 days, between 11:15 and 11:45 each day, to use the room and it has been free, and the nurse knows I want to do this daily. Today, I was told I had to wait at least 45 minutes because she was doing a physical for someone.

This is a violation of the law. I have no where else to go. I ended up pumping in my car, in a parking lot down the road from where I work to make it as private as possible. I'm so incredibly mad, but I'm too embarassed to talk about this with my male boss, and I'm getting no where with emails to management, the nurses, and HR. I need to stop being embarrassed by this, or nothing will change. I need the guts and energy to fight this battle, but I don't have either. Only anger.

Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker 
Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker

Re: So mad... but without the guts to do anything about it.

  • Ugh.  I'm so sorry.  I know how you feel.  I had exactly two options for pumping when I went back to work.  They were the only two offices that had locks and didn't have windows on at least two sides.  The policy is that we have to book conference rooms.  Well, I did just that, and several times people were using that room when it was time for me to pump.  It was SO ANNOYING.  Luckily, it didn't happen all that often, but I would get so fired up when it did.  And, that stress doesn't help much for the supply, you know?

    Have you pulled the "it's the law" card with HR yet?  I would totally do that.

  • I haven't specifically said "it's the law" yet, but it's all over the draft of an email I'm writing now. I know that HR, the nurses, and management are all aware of the law. There's a general Q&A webpage that has a couple of questions about this on there, and they admit that it's the law and that they're working on a better facility. But, no progress (that I can find) has been made since their last update in April.

    I wonder if going so far as to say I'll file a claim with the Department of Labor and Training would get a response....

    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker 
    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
  • That is a tought spot to be in... I would be just like you and chicken out at any opportunity I might have with the boss- prob trying emails like you have so far too.  If your boss is nice enough to try to solve the prob before having to get into filing a claim I might push myself to talk to him first.  Maybe instead of saying "breastfeed", since that may be what you are emb about, you could just say "pump". ?  just a thought to try and makt that conversation a bit easier.  :-)  If nothing from him, I would def remind them it is the law, even mention it to him if have to- nicely of course, but then would have to go to the claim route if really have to.  I just hate that kind of stuff.  Why can't people just do their freakin jobs in the first place?  so annoying.  GL
  • I'm sorry that you're having to deal with this, Amy. I don't have any experience with this, as I didn't go back to work after my kids were born, but I do want to let you know that we're here for support whenever you need to vent!

    I hope that your email gets you what you need from HR, and that a better solution will be made available to you. 

    image
  • That is so frustrating. I'm sorry you had to pump in your car down the street, that sounds awful. Sad I hope your emails get you somewhere so you don't need to have any uncomfortable conversation.

  • imageAmyRI:

    Long story short - state and federal law requires my employer to provide me a private, non-bathroom place to pump breastmilk whenever I need to.

    As it stands, I have to call the occupational nurse's office and ask if the exam room is free each time I want to use it. I have called the past 3 days, between 11:15 and 11:45 each day, to use the room and it has been free, and the nurse knows I want to do this daily. Today, I was told I had to wait at least 45 minutes because she was doing a physical for someone.

    This is a violation of the law. I have no where else to go. I ended up pumping in my car, in a parking lot down the road from where I work to make it as private as possible. I'm so incredibly mad, but I'm too embarassed to talk about this with my male boss, and I'm getting no where with emails to management, the nurses, and HR. I need to stop being embarrassed by this, or nothing will change. I need the guts and energy to fight this battle, but I don't have either. Only anger.

    You need to walk into your bosses office and tell him that they need to provide you with a private, locked place to pump.  If you are old enough to be a parent, you need to be mature enough to state what you need.

    BUT....

    The law actually doesn't state that they have to provide you with it, just that they need to make a reasonable effort.  It sucks but the law actually favors the employer more than the employee.  

    http://www.rilin.state.ri.us/Statutes/TITLE23/23-13.2/23-13.2-1.HTM

     

    Sorry you had to pump in your car.  

     

     

     

     

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  • imagewedding18:
    imageAmyRI:

    Long story short - state and federal law requires my employer to provide me a private, non-bathroom place to pump breastmilk whenever I need to.

    As it stands, I have to call the occupational nurse's office and ask if the exam room is free each time I want to use it. I have called the past 3 days, between 11:15 and 11:45 each day, to use the room and it has been free, and the nurse knows I want to do this daily. Today, I was told I had to wait at least 45 minutes because she was doing a physical for someone.

    This is a violation of the law. I have no where else to go. I ended up pumping in my car, in a parking lot down the road from where I work to make it as private as possible. I'm so incredibly mad, but I'm too embarassed to talk about this with my male boss, and I'm getting no where with emails to management, the nurses, and HR. I need to stop being embarrassed by this, or nothing will change. I need the guts and energy to fight this battle, but I don't have either. Only anger.

    You need to walk into your bosses office and tell him that they need to provide you with a private, locked place to pump.  If you are old enough to be a parent, you need to be mature enough to state what you need.

    BUT....

    The law actually doesn't state that they have to provide you with it, just that they need to make a reasonable effort.  It sucks but the law actually favors the employer more than the employee.  

    http://www.rilin.state.ri.us/Statutes/TITLE23/23-13.2/23-13.2-1.HTM

     

    Sorry you had to pump in your car.  

    You really think that because I'm not comfortable openly discussing milking myself with my male boss, that I'm not mature enough to be a parent? You're right, I need to handle it. And I have every intention of doing so. But I do not think I'm too immature to parent because I find this to be an uncomfortable discussion to have, and have to take some time and figure out what the best approach is. My boss is not the person that can provide me a place to pump. He may be able to get a resolution faster than I am, but I work for the government, and there are separate departments that handle the allocation of space and access to those spaces. If my boss could hand me a key to a storage closet, this would not be an issue.

    The rest of that state law says that if they don't provide break time and a private place to pump, that the employer must be able to demonstrate an undue hardship. On a campus of 30+ buildings and 3000+ employees, there's no way they can demonstrate an undue hardship.

    The federal law is the same.
    http://www.dol.gov/whd/nursingmothers/Sec7rFLSA_btnm.htm

    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker 
    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
  • Just to be devil's advocate....how secure are you in your job? My first reaction was that if you basically threaten them with filing a grievance or suit or whatever that they can make your life hell at work or basically find a way to fire you. Of course they would never fire you for this situation because that would be illegal. I would be afraid of making too many waves for fear of the security of my job. I would definitely send emails and inquire, but I would not threaten. I just feel it would lead to an uncomfortable working situation.

    But hey if they don't provide you with a place then I say to use the time to do errands and pump! 

    Christian Robert: December 13, 2006 image Gianna Catherine; May 10,2009 Mother's Day Baby! image Check out my fitness & health blog! Fit Moms & Full Plates
  • I love the "milking myself" comment.  I too have a male boss, who, I am sure, supported my pumping, but didn't want to discuss it with me.  I kept my pumped milk inside of a little black bag with an ice pack in a shared fridge (shared between my boss, me and his admin assistant).  There was no where else to put it!  Anyways, when I took out the black bag one night to head home, he thought it was a snack, and asked all excitedly, "whatchu got in THERE!??"  And I laughed a little and said "breastmilk" and I thought he wanted to fall through the floor.  Anyways, I guess my point it: I totally understand not wanting to say anything.  Sorry!  That stinks! I hope it works out for you.  (BTW, I also work for the government, so I also understand all the layers of people you have to go through to get a resolution!  fun fun!).

  • I know you're pissed, but I would try to calm down and be rational and go into HR in person this week to discuss this.  I feel like with that many buildings, they should be able to work something out for you.  I'm just worried you're a little too heated and it's definitely not going to help you deal with the bureaucracy!  I think you're using a lot of words that aren't going to go over well (i.e., battle, especially).  If you go in as a sympathetic figure wanting to keep breastfeeding going, I feel as if they'll be much more likely to work with you!

    Not to further point out the obvious, but you definitely need to get over your embarassment.  Breastfeeding isn't something to be embarassed about at all, whether you're speaking to a man or a woman.  Wedding18 put it bluntly, but it's a good point - you need to forget yourself and your hang-ups if you want to deal with this and keep pumping.  And you definitely need to speak to someone in person.

    Good luck!

    image
    It took 5 failed IUIs and a failed IVF, but our FET worked!
    My pregnancy after Infertility Blog
    Our baby girl was born on April 27, 2011!
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