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Job Advice

So I started a new job about a month ago.  Before starting I was super excited about it... I loved everyone I met and what they did seemed really interesting.  The company does something related to, but different from my previous experience, so it was a bit risky.

Since day one, I've been having difficulties.  The biggest problem is I just don't get what's going on.  I have no idea what to do most of the time, I have no idea if I'm doing good or bad work, and I'm having trouble getting feedback.  At first I thought it might be a learning curve, but I feel like by now I shouldn't be clueless.

The secondary problem, which contributes to the main one is that I'm having a hard time connecting with the people.  I like them a lot and they're really nice, but I feel like we are just missing each other in conversation (which makes it hard to figure out what's going on).

At this point, I can't even tell if I have potential for the job or vice versa.  It also has long hours, a long commute, and doesn't pay well (I took it with the idea that the experience would be the payoff, not the money, and its financial contribution to our household is negligible... I can't tell if I'm building any kind of experience).  I'm also miserable to the point of vomiting and taking Excedrin daily.

If you were in this position, how much time would you give it?  Should I try to hold out longer, or is it time to move on?

Re: Job Advice

  • That sounds tough - given the fact that you mentioned being miserable to the point of vomiting and taking excedrin daily I'd suggest looking for other options.

    At least looking will be a step in the right direction.  In the meantime if things get better you can always stay, but if they dont, and you find something better you can happily move on.  Good luck in whatever you decide!

     

  • I definitely agree with what Linds said.

    If this job is making it to the point where you are getting sick, I would definitely start looking at other options.

    In the meantime, is there anyone you can talk to about your tasks? When you do something, maybe ask one of your co-workers if they could take a look at it and make sure it's good?

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  • Ugh - In a lot of ways this was me 6 months ago.  As for the second portion, I think one month is too short of a time perhaps to judge making friendships.  It has taken me quite a few months to feel more comfortable. Maybe not as great as I had it at my last job, but at least I am not crying about missing my friends from the last place much anymore. Is there anyone you think there is potential with that perhaps you could invite one on one for lunch or a happy hour?  Even just breaking thru with one person may open the doors to others.  Are there any work related events that you could participate in? Hell I baked cookies and brought them in in order to talk to a few more people. Dorky, but it sort of worked.  It's hard to break the ice sometimes as the new person.

    As for the part abotu not really getting feedback, is it a management issue? Do others feel as frustated by the leadership? Or is it just unclear direction just for you?  I still think at one month you could try and schedule and sit down with a superior and try and have a come to Jesus meeting. Let them know you would like clearer direction or to get some more specific feedback.  One month is still really new and I don't think they would think less of you for asking.  Then if nothing really comes of it I would have a completely clear conscious about leaving the position.

    I'm sorry you are blue about this. It is so hard to change positions.   You hope the grass is greener and sometimes it's just a different shade of the same old thing.

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  • Temurlang... as someone who is totally Type B and would quite any job that didn't fit me in a heartbeat if it made financial sense - I would move on... vomiting and taking Excedrin daily... your health is suffering! Jobs come and go; some are worth our time and effort more than others. It sounds like the negatives outweigh the positives here. :(
  • Oh wow girl, does stress normally affect you this severely?  I agree with pp that one month isn't long enough to gauge if you'll have good friendships with anyone there yet.  Keep an eye out for something else, just make sure that your next job will be a move up, not a lateral move where you find yourself in the exact same position.
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  • imagejmkes:
    Oh wow girl, does stress normally affect you this severely?  I agree with pp that one month isn't long enough to gauge if you'll have good friendships with anyone there yet.  Keep an eye out for something else, just make sure that your next job will be a move up, not a lateral move where you find yourself in the exact same position.

    No, I have had many stressful jobs before.  But they were stressful in terms of hours, deadlines, or responsibility.  I don't know if everyone would find this stressful, but it's hard for me because I feel like I'm missing things.

    To be fair though, I am probably still stressed by my mom's passing, so maybe making a change at this time wasn't a good idea... that's what DH thinks anyway.

  • imagebellaxanthe:

    Ugh - In a lot of ways this was me 6 months ago.  As for the second portion, I think one month is too short of a time perhaps to judge making friendships.  It has taken me quite a few months to feel more comfortable. Maybe not as great as I had it at my last job, but at least I am not crying about missing my friends from the last place much anymore. Is there anyone you think there is potential with that perhaps you could invite one on one for lunch or a happy hour?  Even just breaking thru with one person may open the doors to others.  Are there any work related events that you could participate in? Hell I baked cookies and brought them in in order to talk to a few more people. Dorky, but it sort of worked.  It's hard to break the ice sometimes as the new person.

    As for the part abotu not really getting feedback, is it a management issue? Do others feel as frustated by the leadership? Or is it just unclear direction just for you?  I still think at one month you could try and schedule and sit down with a superior and try and have a come to Jesus meeting. Let them know you would like clearer direction or to get some more specific feedback.  One month is still really new and I don't think they would think less of you for asking.  Then if nothing really comes of it I would have a completely clear conscious about leaving the position.

    I'm sorry you are blue about this. It is so hard to change positions.   You hope the grass is greener and sometimes it's just a different shade of the same old thing.

    I actually like the people in the office... quite a bit, even.  But it's a weird atmosphere.  Every Thursday we *have to* spend time together for about an hour (watching TV or going to Starbucks or something).  On the other hand, no one takes lunch, not even a quick food run.  Actually they don't eat at all during the day.

    The communication problem is more about getting things done and understanding what's expected.  I already went to my boss on Friday with my concerns.  I didn't really get feedback from her.  I also talked to someone else in the office and she feels the same way, so yes, I think it is kind of a management issue.  But on top of that, I would also say that I'm a very concrete person, so if something's way out there I probably won't get it.

    Today I've also developed a bloody nose... DH asked me why I don't just quit, and I think part of me sees that as failing Sad

  • imagetemurlang:

    imagejmkes:
    Oh wow girl, does stress normally affect you this severely?  I agree with pp that one month isn't long enough to gauge if you'll have good friendships with anyone there yet.  Keep an eye out for something else, just make sure that your next job will be a move up, not a lateral move where you find yourself in the exact same position.

    No, I have had many stressful jobs before.  But they were stressful in terms of hours, deadlines, or responsibility.  I don't know if everyone would find this stressful, but it's hard for me because I feel like I'm missing things.

    To be fair though, I am probably still stressed by my mom's passing, so maybe making a change at this time wasn't a good idea... that's what DH thinks anyway.

     

    Ah, this is a very good point.  I lost my mom almost 9 years ago.  We weren't close when she died, but I can still remember the mourning period.  It would be hard to make a major change like that while still experiencing something so emotional.  Whether you decided to stay or quit, I hope things start to look up for you soon!

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  • It's getting more crazy at work... they're doing a restructuring and it's total chaos.  No one has any clue what's going on or what they're supposed to be doing.  I got put on a call with Israel this morning super early because no one could figure out how I could call in from home.  I also took a call from a client the company no longer has... how does no one know that?

    I haven't made a decision yet, but today was kind of laughable it was so nuts.

  • Well - it's is good that you like ht epeople you generally work with. There is a sort of comraderie in hell - right?  It's not really worth sticking around tough management for very long though. Unless you think it may be changing in the near future - I'm not sure I would put up with it.  Good luck!
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