August 2009 Weddings
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With August reaching the halfway point, I thought maybe an anniversary poll was in order!
1. How has your relationship changed/grown?
2. What big milestones have you taken since you got married?
3. What big milestones are you hoping to take on next?
4. Do you do date nights (did you do them before you got married)? If so, what do you do?
5. What's the biggest challenge you've had to face in your marriage?
Re: Poll: Two Years Later...
2. What big milestones have you taken since you got married? Permanent employment and promotions for both of us! I'm especially proud of Phil, because he's an immigrant (albeit it an English one) and he's had to break into the job market without getting a leg up from connections or the system.
And he got a 92% on his last CGA exam. He'd thought he'd failed. Yeesh.
3. What big milestones are you hoping to take on next? We've decided we're going to start living off one paycheque and put the other one aside so we can finish saving for a house within the next couple of months. And, I'm going off BC after I've finished my allergy tests this month so we can start TTCing.
4. Do you do date nights (did you do them before you got married)? If so, what do you do? Not really. If we do, it's going out to dinner.
5. What's the biggest challenge you've had to face in your marriage? Our indecision is a big one. I don't want to stay where we're living, but if we move, I won't have a job, so that's a big problem. So, we both feel that we're living in this state of limbo right now. We might have to just suck it up for the next year or so until he finishes off the CGA and can get a job that pays enough for me to be off for a year or two... or we have to suck up the fact that we're going to stay in Toronto permanently.
Alyson & Phil | Planning Bio | Married Bio!
Dates & Quinces Blog
Fun!
1. How has your relationship changed/grown? We've gotten closer over the last 2 years and I don't see that stopping any time soon. We don't have a ton of friends that we see through the week (or really on weekends for that matter) so there's a lot of Derek and Andrea time, and it's still good!
2. What big milestones have you taken since you got married? bought a house, started 8 million renovations on said house, got a second cat
3. What big milestones are you hoping to take on next? baby? finish renos?
4. Do you do date nights (did you do them before you got married)? If so, what do you do? not officially. we'll do dinner and a movie every so often!
5. What's the biggest challenge you've had to face in your marriage? learning to communicate. neither of us are big on confrontation so we tend to shut down when we're angry, which just leads to confusion and passive aggressiveness. we're getting better, but it's definitely something we still have to work on.We'll just not tell H about this little fact, m'kay?
1. How has your relationship changed/grown? I don't know. We are closer and communicate better with each other.
2. What big milestones have you taken since you got married? We bought a new condo, became landlords at our old condo, and got a fur baby.
3. What big milestones are you hoping to take on next? We hope to add to our family.
4. Do you do date nights (did you do them before you got married)? If so, what do you do? We go on dates but we don't have a specific night to go out. We didn't before we got married either.
5. What's the biggest challenge you've had to face in your marriage? We lost our baby and we lost my Mom. We are still struggling with if/how we want to expand our family.
The Daily Nugget
Cycle 12, IUI #1 - 33m post wash 10/15/10 = BFN
Cycle 13, IUI #2 - 15m post wash 11/16/10 = BFP, missed m/c, D&C 1/3/11
Cycle 15 - 18, IUI #3-6 = BFN
Cycle 20, IUI #7 = BFP!, missed m/c 9/14, D&C
DE-IVF Aug. 2012: ER 8/30 11R, 7M, 4F; ET 9/4 returned 2
Beta 9/18 #1-820, #2-1699, #3-7124
10/1 1st u/s measuring right on track, 125 bpm
1. How has your relationship changed/grown? It hasn't changed too much, I think we've just closer and more comfortable/in tune with each other.
2. What big milestones have you taken since you got married? Travelled a ton, checking a number of places off our wishlist. Started TTC.
3. What big milestones are you hoping to take on next? Hopefully getting pg and having a baby. Maybe find a new job for me. Then find a new job for DH and move back to the US, buy a house and car and actually get somewhat settled.
4. Do you do date nights (did you do them before you got married)? If so, what do you do? We got out to dinner about once a week, and then have a tv/movie night in once a week.
5. What's the biggest challenge you've had to face in your marriage? I can't think of anything big to be honest. We don't have a ton of friends here, so it's been a challenge (and somewhat good) for our relationship to keep ourselves entertained and the relationship interesting with just the two of us.
Cecilia arrived 12 October 2012
Apologies for the long answers!
1. How has your relationship changed/grown? We've been together for9.5 years, so we've grown and changed a lot in that time. But in these past two years, I think we're coming to even deeper understandings and franker discussions because, hey, we're in this for the long haul and we're not into hiding anything from each other. We just remember that we learn as we get older--and remind each other that we enjoy learning together.
2. What big milestones have you taken since you got married? Couples counseling, I suppose--not because of marriage problems, but because of not being able to decide, individually or together, on kids. I think it was a major step for both of us, and now we're on the next step after that. Still no decision, but we're working on it.
3. What big milestones are you hoping to take on next? Figure out the kid thing. I confess I'm feeling old these days, going on 34 in May, but I'm not feeling any hint of baby fever. I don't know--the next milestone could be finally moving out West.
4. Do you do date nights (did you do them before you got married)? If so, what do you do? Never did date nights, but we're actually thinking about starting. Our dinner out on Friday evening was lovely, so Josh suggested we do it more often as the weather cools down. We'll just be trying out different restaurants downtown, getting away from the apartment.
5. What's the biggest challenge you've had to face in your marriage? Merging our finances has been tough, at least for me--I'm so insecure about money and made us split everything 50/50 even though he makes twice as much. But that's changing--he's helped me nearly kill my student loan, we've evened out the spending between us, and we're saving like crazy. He keeps on saying it's our money, our future, our life together--and I'm slowly but surely starting to think like that.5lbs 9 oz, 18.5 inches long
6 months: 16lbs 15 oz, 27 inches long
1. How has your relationship changed/grown? We appreciate each other a lot more and really enjoy spending time together. We have a lot of individual interests but have found ways to both enjoy or be a part of certain hobbies.
2. What big milestones have you taken since you got married? We got two cats! We lost a baby at 8 weeks.
3. What big milestones are you hoping to take on next? We are waiting to start TTC again and are hoping to expand our family soon. We'll be moving back to the US next year so we are excited.
4. Do you do date nights (did you do them before you got married)? If so, what do you do? We occasionally go out to eat at the restaurants in our town. We did that quite a bit before we got married and still try to when we can.
5. What's the biggest challenge you've had to face in your marriage? Losing our baby and getting ready to TTC.With August reaching the halfway point, I thought maybe an anniversary poll was in order!
1. How has your relationship changed/grown? We've both settled down a bit over the past few years. We used to try to cram everything in, whether it was going out on a weeknight or trying to do too much in a weekend. Now, we've accepted that we can't see all our friends all the time, and things for each other take precedence. We're also much more conscious about our finance than we were premarriage.
2. What big milestones have you taken since you got married? I was unemployed when we got married, but fortunately, I am now employed full time. We've traveled a lot and are currently doing some renovations at our house.
3. What big milestones are you hoping to take on next? TTC and buying a family-friendly car.
4. Do you do date nights (did you do them before you got married)? If so, what do you do? Not really. We do go out regularly on our own, but it's usually a last minute decision.
5. What's the biggest challenge you've had to face in your marriage? Getting used to each others' families and the everyday stresses of having both people working.
1. How has your relationship changed/grown? We are much closer than I ever thought possible. We've both learned each others moods and I know when to give him his space and when he needs me to just listen.
2. What big milestones have you taken since you got married? We bought a house and became parents this year.
3. What big milestones are you hoping to take on next? We hope to start some renovations on our house next year so we need to rework our budget, pay off some credit cards and start saving more than we do now.
4. Do you do date nights (did you do them before you got married)? If so, what do you do? We do but not as much since we had the baby and are trying to cut back on spending. We usually go to dinner and a movie, sometimes we go to dinner and concerts.
5. What's the biggest challenge you've had to face in your marriage? Becoming parents while continuing to stay close as a couple. Having Olivia has made us much closer than we used to be, but now we have to work at our relationship and making time for just the two of us. Our intimacy has plummeted but I am hoping that will change when she moves into her room. I know we are lucky that has been our biggest challenge so far and I am far from complaining.
1. How has your relationship changed/grown? We had been together a long time, but the 2 intercontinental moves have really made us closer. There's no one else who quite understands what we're going through so we've bonded over that.
2. What big milestones have you taken since you got married? Moved to London, Moved to Cambodia, E passed the bar and got his LLM, travelled to a lot of amazing places, became an aunt and uncle for the first time
3. What big milestones are you hoping to take on next? Moving back to the US and me figuring out what I want out of my career/possibly pursuing something I'm more passionate about
4. Do you do date nights (did you do them before you got married)? If so, what do you do? Here, we went out to dinner at least once or twice a week but never really formalized it as "date night." That will probably change in LA and become more nights in, since A. I want to improve my cooking skills and B. I'm fairly certain you can't get dinner and drinks for 2 for less than $1O like you can here.
5. What's the biggest challenge you've had to face in your marriage? The 2 intercontinental moves. Especially being here - it's been tough for me and since it was his job that brought us here, I know he feels guilty. It's led to a bit of tension but that's over now of course!
Now jumping domestically.
Well that was a crazy couple of years.
1. How has your relationship changed/grown? Since we dated for 8 years before getting married and lived together for several year, it hasn't changed a ton. I do think that we've grown closer as many of our friends have moved away and we have more time at home with just the two of us.
2. What big milestones have you taken since you got married? I finished my MBA and started a new job. Kyle started a business. So I guess you could say that we've been busy.
3. What big milestones are you hoping to take on next? We're considering moving to an area where there would be more job opportunities for Kyle.
4. Do you do date nights (did you do them before you got married)? If so, what do you do? We don't have designated date nights but we go out to dinner and/or a movie occasionally.
5. What's the biggest challenge you've had to face in your marriage? I guess it's been learning to deal with death. I lost my step-dad several months into our marriage and Kyle lost his grandpa about a year ago.1. How has your relationship changed/grown?
we have more love and respect for each other then we had before
2. What big milestones have you taken since you got married?
we bought a house together, we got my sweet PP, we had alice and her kittens (who found a home togheter on a farm), and I got a job
3. What big milestones are you hoping to take on next?
we want to have a baby
4. Do you do date nights (did you do them before you got married)? If so, what do you do?
no not really with my stepson here all the time we mainly stay home just going out for special ocasions like my birthday or our aniversary. but when jordan goes and spends time with his mother's family we have romantic dinner and movie time. we did go out on dates befre the wedding though
5. What's the biggest challenge you've had to face in your marriage?
just trying to get into a grove together as we did not live together during our courtship, also getting use to a stepson who treats me like a real mom even coming to me first when he is sick
1. How has your relationship changed/grown? I wouldn't say it's changed exactly; we've just continued to grow closer, particularly now that we make decisions more out of the interest of *us* as a family rather than as individuals. I think we have both matured and grown more secure in our relationship - we both dealt with some jealousy and trust issues in the beginning, and those are pretty much nonexistant now.
2. What big milestones have you taken since you got married? Umm, life is pretty much the same for us since we've got married. Still live in the same apartment, still drive the same car, etc. The only big change I guess is that I passed the bar exam and started working.
3. What big milestones are you hoping to take on next? We want to get a dog! We also both want new jobs.
4. Do you do date nights (did you do them before you got married)? If so, what do you do? We don't have designated date nights, but we go out a lot.
5. What's the biggest challenge you've had to face in your marriage? Being apart 5-6 months out of the year has been challenging for us. This is our fifth year doing it, and I've basically had to tell him that I can't do it anymore and he needs to find a new job that will allow us to be together most of the year. I feel bad because I know he wants a new job too but they are extremely hard to come by in his industry. I hate to add to any more pressure on him.
2. What big milestones have you taken since you got married? We both finished school and then got 'real' jobs. I ended up leaving my job and I am returning to school this fall. We also got another dog.
3. What big milestones are you hoping to take on next? I am going to grad school and DH and I have talked about moving out of hometown so I can go. There is also talk of him staying here while a move away, that would be biggest challenge we would have to face.
4. Do you do date nights (did you do them before you got married)? If so, what do you do? This past year was really hard being that we never saw each other working opposite schedules so we would do date mornings on the weekends before I went to work. Now we just spend DH's days off together.
5. What's the biggest challenge you've had to face in your marriage?
Working opposite schedules and trying to justify it. It was really hard when no one at work would help us even though we worked at the same agency. We were falling apart because we never saw each other or each others families. We had to have the hardest discussion of our relationship when it came to whether I would stay at the agency. I now know I made the best choice and we are already happier and in a better spaces with our relationship.
1. How has your relationship changed/grown? This last year or so I think we have become better/stronger as a couple. Between Ed battling some depression when he was miserable in his job in our first year of marriage, and TTC all this year and then miscarrying this summer, it has been a lot of emotional stuff, but we have learned how to rely on each other and support each other.
2. What big milestones have you taken since you got married? I got my masters, Ed found a job he now loves, and we got pregnant and miscarried.
3. What big milestones are you hoping to take on next? Get pregnant again and get to keep this baby.
4. Do you do date nights (did you do them before you got married)? If so, what do you do? Sort of...we go out together at least once a week, but sometimes it is more because we are too lazy to cook than because we are going on a date...we go to dinner and movies a lot.
5. What's the biggest challenge you've had to face in your marriage? Hmm, I would say it is either the TTC process or Ed's job hunt process--both of those was worse on one of us than the other (TTC on me, job hunt on Ed) and it is hard for both of us when we can't fix it for the other person.
BFP 5/2/11, missed m/c, D&C 6/13/11
BFP 12/8/11--Little Girl E Born 8/22/12
2. What big milestones have you taken since you got married? I finished school, IVF, adoption, taking on progressively bigger home renos.
3. What big milestones are you hoping to take on next? big home renos! And being awesome parents to Myles, and becoming debt free!
4. Do you do date nights (did you do them before you got married)? If so, what do you do? This is a tradition we've always had. We *try* to go out once a week, and at a minimum 2xs a month. We try new places to eat, see movies, go to festivals. It kind of depends.
5. What's the biggest challenge you've had to face in your marriage?
Aside from the obvious of having to hold a funeral for Avery, Trinity, and Langston, and the additional health issues that came along from their birth. We also had to decide not to have biological children. The non child related challenge is learning to deal with Sean's schedule (which thankfully is much better now).
1. How has your relationship changed/grown?
I feel like we get better and better at being partners in life. We work really well together tackling things that come up - this became especially apparent when we moved and fixed up this house. I'm so, so glad to have a partner like that as we tackle parenthood.
2. What big milestones have you taken since you got married?
Sold our condo, bought a house, V graduated and started working, and had a baby... basically, we transitioned really quickly from DINKs in the city to a "family".
3. What big milestones are you hoping to take on next?
I think we've had quite a lot for the past year! But V's post doc will end soon and he'll hopefully be moving into something more permanent. We're also trying to plan our first family trip sometime in the winter.
4. Do you do date nights (did you do them before you got married)? If so, what do you do?
Yes and yes, but I kind of consider almost any time we go out to be a "date night". Usually we'd have a meal out. We do it less now with a kid obviously, but we're making an effort to get out as much as possible.
5. What's the biggest challenge you've had to face in your marriage?
Navigating our relationships with our parents. Neither of us are super close to our parents and awkward situations seem to come up all the time with them. Like, MIL still constantly tries to lean on V to deal with her problems. And my parents are really passive aggressive and get mad when we don't read their minds about certain things. I imagine all of this can only get worse now that Darian's in the picture, but we continue to do our best.
Baby #2: Surprise BFP 9.19.12, EDD 5.24.13, natural m/c 10.19.13 at 9w
1. How has your relationship changed/grown?
We have grown up alot together since we've been married, which has let us grown closer as well. We have learned to work together to resolve issues alot better.
2. What big milestones have you taken since you got married?
We moved out of our tiny apartment and got a house. We TTC for 8 months and finally got pregnant and now have our amazing little guy Noah.
3. What big milestones are you hoping to take on next?
I'm hoping to get into a work-at-home-mom type of job within the next 6 months so I don't have to go back to work at the restaurant. I really have always wanted to be a stay at home Mom, but financially it wouldn't be an option for me to have no income. We will see.
4. Do you do date nights (did you do them before you got married)? If so, what do you do?
Once in a while we do dinner and a movie, but that's it.
5. What's the biggest challenge you've had to face in your marriage?
I guess we're going through it now - learning how to be parents and still keep our relationship strong. Making time for each other is hard. I've always got a baby attached me, haha. He is still learning that I've changed a lot since Noah was born, but I'm still the same person he married, too.
My Blogs - Signed in Ink
Cloth Diaper World
Great poll, kaesha!
1. How has your relationship changed/grown? We have much more confidence in our relationship and our ability to communicate now. We're very much on the same page after two years of marriage and it makes it easier to make decisions together, voice our opinions and concerns without causing an argument, and encourage each other in pursuing individual interests.
2. What big milestones have you taken since you got married? We moved to a different state, DH graduated, we bought a new vehicle, I've started a side business, and we purchased our first home
3. What big milestones are you hoping to take on next? Get our house fully renovated before Christmas, find a new full-time job for me, and possibly start TTC the first part of next year
4. Do you do date nights (did you do them before you got married)? If so, what do you do? We go out on a date every week. It's something we've always done even before marriage, and I'm very happy we've kept up with it. We like to switch it up and keep our dates fun so we'll do anything from dinner and a movie to laser tag to a mid-day picnic to going to a concert. We even double date occasionally with married friends.
5. What's the biggest challenge you've had to face in your marriage? DH went through a period of depression and started drinking heavily a few months into our marriage. He comes from a family with a history of alcoholism and I was scared he was falling into that pattern so I suggested he speak with someone. It was a very difficult time for us because for awhile he wouldn't seek help and since he was a totally different person during that time all we did was fight. Fortunately he was strong enough to eventually acknowledge he had a problem and he's been sober and our relationship has been happy and healthy ever since