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F/O Parents paying for flights - well kind of
DH's parents are insisting on paying for flights for us to come home for a visit next year December. We were told that we are coming home and that is the end of it. (There was no discussion of it, asked if we wanted to, etc. That peeved me off, but that is a story for another day). They are paying for our flights and SIL flight because MIL wants a big family Christmas, so all the cousins, spouses and kids are being flown in (only 2 out of 8 cousins live in SA) for the Christmas. I am not as 'happy' as I should be about this. This will be the first time that we have gone back to SA in 5.5 years and the first time that James will be there. We have planned a trip every year and every year something has gone wrong so those funds were needed somewhere else. I don't really get home sick. I have no desire to go back to SA. I think a lot of it is that my family has broken down and the house that I grew up in is no longer there, so when we do go and stay we have to stay with IL's and already SIL has said to me 'Where are you guys going to stay because I am staying with Mom and Dad' to which we had no response. My Mom has moved 2 hours outside of Cape Town, so we can stay there some nights, but it would be impossible to have that as our base. My Dad is married to the devil's evil sister, so that is out as well. I have suggested to DH that maybe we try and find a 'holiday accomodation' to rent for 2 weeks. He says that because SIL goes home every year and all her friends live in that area (within 5 minutes drive of MIL house) that she can go and stay by a friend, and besides its easier for her being 1 person as opposed to us being 3 people. But if she doesn't, it will be DH, myself and James on a sofabed in the lounge and SIL in her bedroom, which is definitely not encouraging. To rent holiday accomondation in Cape Town in December is crazy expensive. December is hot in SA (another reason we never wanted to go back in Dec), and I am worried about James' skin and the heat. Here when it gets to 77 here his skin flares up, I don't want to know what it is going to when the temp gets to 100 there.
Ok, I got side tracked. What I had meant to ask was how to split your time between parents when you go hoem if one set of parents have paid for your tickets home? We will be in SA for James' 5th birthday, Christmas Eve, Christmas Day, Boxing Day and NYE. We also need to fit in friends and extended families. Oh and my Mom and Dad are divorced, so they also need to be fitted in.
Our 'plan' at the moment is James Birthday at Rantaga Junction (a theme park) - its neutral ground, and tons of fun, everyone can come to us; Christmas Eve - My Mom - she does big Christmas Eve's; Christmas Day - DH's family; Boxing Day - DH wants to spend with his parents friends?; NYE - Our friends. But how do we break down the rest of the time? And would a theme park in the scorching heat be fun for a tiny 5 year old?
Re: F/O Parents paying for flights - well kind of
Chronically hilarious - you'll split your stitches!
I wrote a book! Bucket list CHECK!
http://notesfortheirtherapist.blogspot.co.uk
Tofu, my mom and IL's live a good 1.5 - 2 hours away from each other, with no traffic. My Dad stays somewhere in between, but I am not close with my Dad because of his evil b.tch wife (The woman's nickname is gifappel, in English that means poisonous apple, and her own Mother gave her that nickname. She also had her kids taken away from her because she locked them in a cupboard and then went out. She ended up in a mental institution after that. And I don't know why my Dad married her, but he did and he is now an alcoholic.)
My Mom pretends to get along with my MIL, but I know she does that for my sake. In reality she can't stand the woman.
Yeah, it's always super complicated for us when we go home - my parents are divorced and DH's aren't. My dad and inlaws only live about 4 hours apart, so that's easy, but my mom's on the other side of the country. My inlaws paid for us to go home once and we stayed with them for pretty much the entire visit. I think we were home for a week and we stayed at a friends one night, so six nights with the inlaws. My dad drove out for a day and stayed overnight at my inlaws.
Sometimes you just have to let people come to you. My mom is always super upset and bitter that I don't go see her but it's really, really far away from everyone else and it just makes everything so complicated. I think anything you can plan to put everyone in the same place makes it all much easier.
BFP Apr 2012, EDD Dec 19 2012 * twin h/b at 6wk, 9wk scan * Baby A lost at 12wks, Baby B was my rainbow born at 36wks