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Did this happen to any of you? I need to vent if you don't mind?
Wonderin' if this happen to any of you? I noticed a lot of girls seemed to get pregnant right after they got married so I'm sure that brings super excitement in your life............but for me .... It's only been 3 mos since I got married, I have an awesome husband who I'm thankful every day for.....However, I've been feeling really down lately now that the hoopla of the wedding is over. And to think all I kept saying was that I wanted life to go back to normal.....Unfortunately, my life has been less then normal for the pat 3 mos.but I don't know if its a combo of what I'm about to mention below or just adjusting to marriage?????
I'm dealing w/ a sick mother in law and trying to get the right live in Aide to take care of her....We're on our third agency and 6th Aide...not to mention MY husband's ex continues to visit his mother!!!....yeah she became the "doting daughter in law" only after they divorced 3 yrs ago - It's apparent she can't let go and it's also apparent her visits have nothing to do with my mother in law and everything to do with still wanting to be the thorn in my husbands side forever more!. She also has remained friends w/ my husbands brother and wife - she is the Godmother to their son. I have felt less then welcomed into the family -- but what can I do?.......I've about had it with this biotch getting her way SO we decided to have papers served to her via the doctor and lawyer to her ....notifying her in writing that all communication needed to be ceased immediately with the mother - and that it was for the mother's well being and that she needed to abide by these orders. Apparently the girl can't take no for an answer.
Then my husband's brother who disappeard & hasn't been around since last Sept! Neither he or his wife have visited my mother in law and my sister in law has called all of 4 times this year. The brother's panties got into a twist because he wasn't made full POA. He's got control issues and told my husband to F off and take it lock stock and barrell & this was last September.........Fast fwd tothe other nite.....We got a call from the Aide telling us my sister in law is coming with little Joey (seriously wow what a coincidence) my husband's ex was just served w/ these papers and NOW their deciding to visit and guess who my sister in law said she was bringing? You got it....my husband's ex! WTF?.....So the other nite my husband's brother decided to flip out on the Aide over the phone and flip out on the mother who he hasn't spoken to in a year ! All because the Aide simply called my sister in law wondering when my sister in law was finally coming to visit? ( because they are not aware the status of my mother in laws health but it does take time to get her ready & the Aide wanted to make sure she had her ready but my mother in law was confused as to which day they were coming so that's why the Aide called my sister in law who after she was asked she would be coming all of a sudden said hold on please & handed the phone to my brother in law who proceeded to go on a rampage on this Aide screaming at her Who the F does she think she is? And that she doesn't know what he's capable of and she better put his mother on the phone and if she didn't he had keys to the house and he would be there in an hour!
Can you freaking believe this? I think I'm still in shock? -- I guess it didn't help the sitch when I had sent an email that very same day from me and my husband simply saying it is necessary for the Aide to know when she would be visiting so she could have the mother ready & to note if she had any intention on bringing my husband's ex wife we were notifying her that the ex was served w/ paper's per the doctors orders that she is not allowed to visit and we hope she can accept and respect the boundaries we've set. With the email and the call all hell broke loose.
Anyway I guess the above is one of the reasons I'm feeling down. It's certainly not the honeymoon phase I thought I'd be in.........but did any of you have a hard time adjusting to married life? I guess I just threw in the drama above so you can understand my head is ready to blow off my shoulders.
Vent over :-(
Re: Did this happen to any of you? I need to vent if you don't mind?
Um, welcome to the board?
ETA: Sorry if I was rude. I'm having a crap day and really did not remember your intro post awhile back.
Anyway, it just sounds like a rough time. It stinks when the honeymoon is over and reality bites back. Unfortunately, it happens to all of us at some point or another. Marriage is definitely an adjustment. All of a sudden it's not just you and your stuff but, that of your husband and whatever baggage his family brings.
Canon 50D, Canon 50mm f/1.4, Tamron 28-75mm f/2.8, Speedlite 430EX II
was just thinking the same thing.. i think we need a little GTKY post... people are coming out of the dark here!
Hello. I've waited here for you. Everlong<3<br>
I am going to go pop some popcorn before sitting down to read this.
Always missing my Mommy (1954-2010) and Daddy (1943-2012)
TTC since 2009 ; BFP 9/13/10 = MC 10/21/10
DX = DOR/POA (AMH=1.1; AFC=4-5)
Surprise BFP 8/31/11 while waiting to cycle for IVF
Welcomed our little miracle 5/7/12
a) unless your MIL got sick overnight Im sure you had some insight into what you were getting into
b) becoming part of a blended family is NEVER easy.
c) put on your big girl panties and let the ex DIL come see the MIL. Who cares if your not her favorite? Your MIL is ill and should be able to spend her time with whoever she wants.
Hi, I have the attention span of a 2 year old so my "insight" may or may not be helpful in this case.
I can see how having your DH's ex around would suck but it sounds like you're pretty much stuck with her. I'm guessing that she became your nephew's godmother before you and DH got married? What did you think would happen? Whatever her motives may be, she will be involved in that family's life whether you like it or not. It sounds like they like it that way.
I'm sorry this transition is difficult for you. I think we've all had trouble adjusting at one point or another. Good luck!
*Jen&Louie - I introduced myself a few weeks ago I came over from The Knot - Some of the girls do know me here....I guess you missed my hello post.
*NYBride10 .... We've spoken many times on The Knot ...I guess you didn't recognize my name?
Anyway - sorry if my vent threw you since you didn't know me .
Hello. I've waited here for you. Everlong<3<br>
As for the transition into post-wedding: We may be a rarity, but we had NO issues transitioning. We lived together for 2 years before we got married so actually, it felt like nothing changed.
As for your situation, it sounds like it sux. Any time you handle in-laws that are not the easiest to get along with, there is going to be issues. SOrry you have to go through this but I am sure it will make your relationship stronger in the end. You are a good DIL for helping out so much with your MIL.
As hard as it is, you may want to let the Ex thing go a little though. Easier said than done, I am sure. BUT, she is going to be around whether you like it or not. Be the bigger person and kill her with kindness.
Thanks so much for all the feedback. I truly appreciate it. It's just hard sometimes when you're newly married and have been catapulted off your happy "honeymoon phase" cloud - it makes ya wonder.....is it me or what? I know I'll get hrough this.........thanks again for the advice / support.
-Lee