Our tech team has launched updates to The Nest today. As a result of these updates, members of the Nest Community will need to change their password in order to continue participating in the community. In addition, The Nest community member's avatars will be replaced with generic default avatars. If you wish to revert to your original avatar, you will need to re-upload it via The Nest.
If you have questions about this, please email help@theknot.com.
Thank you.
Note: This only affects The Nest's community members and will not affect members on The Bump or The Knot.
Help!
I'm sure by now you know I'm incapable of making decisions myself. So I'm working on a job application that's due today. Even though I've been looking for a new job, this one came up through a former colleague of my husband, not through my looking, so keep that in mind when giving me advice about the following.
I have to include three references, and there's only one person here who knows I'm even considering applying for new jobs. Of the four other people I would consider listing, one is my boss, one works directly in our office, and two others work in another office with which we work closely. So my options are:
1. Pick two of the three that aren't my boss and swear them to secrecy.
2. Pick my boss as one of them and lay it all out there. I would totally spin it like, I wasn't looking for this job, it found me. Because it's the truth and I'm willing to gloss over the fact that I'm looking. I'd rather stab myself in the eye with a pencil than tell her, but honestly, it's in the same field that I currently work in and, while we don't have a close relationship with the prospective employer, she's interacted with them before, so she might be a good name to list. And it's a different job than I do now, so I wouldn't have to be like, I don't like working here. I could be like, this other thing sounds like fun.
Thoughts? Other suggestions? Remember that I have to make a decision, well, now, so I basically have to tell the people today. 
Re: Help!
I would go with choice #2. If I were your boss and found out through the grapevine that you were applying elsewhere and wasn't told then I might be a bit bitter. If you can gloss it over on the front end while still making her feel like she is "in the know" then she might take it better. And I think a recommendation from your boss, if she is connected to anyone at the other company, would be better than if she said nothing (since she didn't know) and, even worse, then got asked for more information from someone she knows there.
Good luck!
I would not pick my boss unless I was part of a pending layoff or something where my boss would expect me to be looking for another job.