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I have a confession
It's silly, but it's been bothering me that I feel this way.
We are renting, so with that in mind, I could not do DS's nursery exactly the way I had wanted. I got the PBK bedding that I loved (on clearance!) and the furniture I liked. I also spent a good amount on a painting of the dog for his room (a "keep a watchful eye on him" kind of mentality). If I could have, we'd have painted the walls and put crown molding and a chair rail in and it would have been precious.
So my friend who has a baby about a month older than DS came over for a playdate last weekend. For the first time ever, I felt very self conscious about DS's bedroom. I think it's because it's very minimalistic (which is my style anyway) in comparison to her DD's room- which she spent several thousand on decorating.
I don't know, I am a little self conscious about the house we live in (it's very small and not all that nice) but like I said, we are renting and in limbo trying to figure out what our next steps are. It's not worth it to buy a house if we don't think we'll stay plus we are about another 8 months from our desired area down payment.
It was odd, because I don't usually give a crap about this stuff. I'm not very materialistic though I like to be surrounded by pretty things. And I'm ashamed I felt a twinge of that last week.
I guess I just needed to get that out.
Re: I have a confession
Aww, I'm sorry. I think it's only natural that those kinds of "keeping up with the Joneses" feelings sneak up on us every once in a while. You know, of course, that you have absolutely nothing to be embarrassed about but sometimes your feelings override your brain.
You guys are just in a temporary situation and I'm sure that can get stressful and annoying on a bunch of levels. Just take comfort in the fact that you're giving DS a great home life and that you'll get where you want to be very soon.
Do NOT feel bad about any of that!!! Ack, it kills me to see that you would dwell on this for even a moment. You are going to make a great mom and it doesn't take giant playrooms or tennis courts or other expensive privileges to give your kid a leg up in this world. Besides food, clothes, and a roof, all a kid really needs is love and encouragement to succeed and be happy.
My sisters and I grew up without a lot of extras but we never felt deprived or upset about our situation. We appreciated what our parents were able to give us all the more because we knew it was hard-earned.
Chin up, ladies!
I can see how it's hard since your living situation isn't permanent. I know saying "the nursery doesn't matter" won't make you feel better, but it's true. You know mine is very minimalist also.
Someday he will have the room you picture for him- but for now he has his wonderful parents, big sister doggie, and a stellar nanny. I say that far outweighs his lack of crown moulding
Ha, thanks everyone!
I did tell myself when I was pregnant that spending money on his "big boy" room was a lot more important than on a room he'd have no memory of.
And Came, DH's friends have a crapton of money. They aren't really snotty, but both sets of parents are well off and help them a lot. Plus she's a doctor. They also have A LOT for their kids that DS will never have- but that's okay. I mean, I can't compare myself and what I can financially give to my child with people whose parents give them money and to someone who makes a doctor's salary!
Excellent point.
I know. Sometimes these feelings just sneak up on me. I do think for the most part I don't compare myself.