Buying A Home
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How do you figure out "community values"?

This is going to sound like a funny question - if you are moving to a new area, how do you figure out what town/neighborhood will be a best fit for your family in terms of values, norms, etc?

 

<br>Concrete example: After my dad's job moved us to another state, my parents ended up buying a home in a smaller town (maybe 9,000 people) where everyone had very similar values/activities/parenting style/life choices, and you were judged VERY harshly if you deviated from that norm. For example, 20+ years later, my mom and I STILL hear about my decision to enroll in an art class instead of the socially mandatory town little league. Had we moved instead to other little town bordering ours, though, my rejection of team sports wouldn't have been noteworthy. I know my mom felt like her values/autonomy as a parent were compromised by being in such a restrictive environment, and I can't say I have particularly warm memories of that place either.

 

<br>Needless to say, I will never move to a small town voluntarily, but I'm thinking that even if we lived in X neighborhood of even a big, diverse town, there would be a collective focus on or leaning toward certain political agendas, community activities, etc, to which we would have to belong in order to fit in. How do we find out in advance the more esoteric elements of a prospective community, so we can avoid an environment that doesn't "fit" our family?

DS Feb 2011
...no thanks to my PCOS (Dx 2006,though should've been dx during maybe the Clinton years).

P/SAIF always welcome, especially if you share your sticky baby dust! **Looking to buy some gently used, one size Fuzzibunz. PM/Page me if you're selling. Thanks!**

Re: How do you figure out &amp;quot;community values&amp;quot;?

  • nsfwnsfw member

    Read the town's newspaper. Read the editorials and letters to the editor.

    Talk to people who live there. Try going shopping at local stores in the area to get a better feel for it. Find out what some of the city-sponsored events are and attend some.  What are the city's voting issues? What has been voted for or against?

    I think some of these things can only be learned by being immersed in the town's culture for awhile. The forums on CityData might be helpful.

    image
  • If we moved to a new area which I was not familiar with, I would definitely look at renting to get a feel for things first.  That way you are not stuck in an area if you decide it isn't a fit for you.
  • I don't care what others think of my choices. I do what suits me and my family.

    Stand up for your own values, political agendas, activities & interests.  If they don't have many - start your own group.

    Don't teach your kids to follow the crowd.

  • Check out their .gov website to see whats up there.  Also try seeing whats on facebook about them.  The closest town to where we are building is tiny.  One stop sign tiny.  But you can see on their facebook that they have little summer concerts, farmers markets, parades, etc.


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  • Can you rent for a year to get a feel for the area? Talk with a realtor and see what they recommend for a place to rent to get a feel for the area. Then buy when you are sure what you want.

    We wanted a town that had good but not ultra competitive schools, a good percentage of married households with kids, good median incomes, good housing prices and short commutes for both DH and me. We narrowed it down to two towns based on what I read online, then talked with realtors about neighborhoods in those towns. You should be able to do the same, based on what your personal must-have community lists are. Good luck!

    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
    met DH 1995 ~ married DH 2006 ~ completed our family 2008
    Life is good!
  • That's a great question!  Something that hasn't been mentioned is looking on the Nest's local boards and ask for honest input there.  We've had some women peek in on our local board and have asked about certain characteristics of the larger city and smaller neighborhoods.  Because we have a high % of transplants, I think the views offered are fairly realistic and honest.
    Willa 4.6.06 and Henry 10.18.08 Camp Sinki
  • imageSisugal:

    I don't care what others think of my choices. I do what suits me and my family.

    Stand up for your own values, political agendas, activities & interests.  If they don't have many - start your own group.

    Don't teach your kids to follow the crowd.

    Of course you do have a point, but I think most parents would agree that they wouldn't want to raise their kids in an environment where literally everyone is hostile to their own family values. I filter out TV shows and books that have topics I don't want my son exposed to, why not be similarly selective in his environment, school, etc?
    DS Feb 2011
    ...no thanks to my PCOS (Dx 2006,though should've been dx during maybe the Clinton years).

    P/SAIF always welcome, especially if you share your sticky baby dust! **Looking to buy some gently used, one size Fuzzibunz. PM/Page me if you're selling. Thanks!**
  • imageemjacobs13:

    Check out their .gov website to see whats up there.  Also try seeing whats on facebook about them.  The closest town to where we are building is tiny.  One stop sign tiny.  But you can see on their facebook that they have little summer concerts, farmers markets, parades, etc.


     

    hee hee.  This is a brilliant idea... that town's .gov website has an 'about Acme Village" section with 6 paragraphs - 3 are about their "wonderful" public schools, 2 about their "awesome" sports programs.  It's more what they don't say...

    DS Feb 2011
    ...no thanks to my PCOS (Dx 2006,though should've been dx during maybe the Clinton years).

    P/SAIF always welcome, especially if you share your sticky baby dust! **Looking to buy some gently used, one size Fuzzibunz. PM/Page me if you're selling. Thanks!**
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