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Sad :( (death related)
I just found out that my first boyfriend, my first love, someone who I still care about a lot as a friend, lost his father to an apparent suicide. 
Unfortunately, the services were held yesterday and I had no idea, so I cannot show my support by going. I'm devastated for my ex and his family... he is on leave from Afghanistan, and his sister is expecting. His mom is as you would expect... completely heartbroken, confused, and has major feelings of guilt and anger.
I'm so confused myself, as his dad was the friendliest, seemingly happiest person I've met. He was so kind to me and my family and never had anything bad to say, and was always joking around. Nobody understands what's going on.
I have reached out to him in the best way I know how... sent him a message letting him know how much I care and that I'm there for him, sent a food basket to his/ his mom's house, etc. But those gestures never seem to be enough in this situation.
I know there isn't anything I can do, but if you have been through a suicide loss and have any advice on how I can help my dear friend, please share... and if you're the praying type, please pray for PJ and his family.
Re: Sad :( (death related)
I am so sorry. That is absolutely heartbreaking. Death is difficult to deal with in any situation, but I think suicide is the worst. I don't know that you can do anything beyond what you've already done- letting the person know you're there and supporting them. My thoughts and prayers are with him and his family.
I went through something like this two weeks ago, when my cousin took his life. It came as a total shock to pretty much everyone in our family as well. His obit wasn't printed until the day after the funeral to keep the services private. I don't think there's much more you can do. Maybe just follow up with him in a bit to let him know you're still thinking of him and his family.
I'll be praying for him and his family.
:-(
So sorry. (((HUGS)))
I have no advice.
Neena Mae. 1/7/10
"A baby nursing at a mother's breast is an undeniable affirmation of our rootedness in nature." - David Suzuki
i think what you've done so far is very sweet and very thoughtful. T&P for him and hils family.
One suggestion: in a couple weeks to a month, when the dust has settled and reality is setting in, I would call him and/or meet up with him and let him talk. My DH's brother died suddenly (though not by suicide) and he said lots of people told him they were there if he needed them, a lot of them did not reach out. Whether they didn't know what to say, they didn't think of it, or they didn't want to intrude....they just never followed up.
I think calling and saying "How are you? Would you like to talk about it?" goes a long way. Dancing around it does no good, you both know you're both thinking about it.