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::Sigh:: Kicking myself (a little long)
I can't remember if I mentioned my BFF had chosen her 18 yr old cousin as her MOH. I had found out at her engagement party from her and she said she had an awful week (upset and crying) trying to decide what to do because she didn't want to rank her friends. I know she was trying to make it one of those decisions that would make it hard for anyone to be upset about her choice, being a blood relative and a very close relative.
Well turns out, her cousin told her recently since she started college, she was a little overwhelmed (though it's still almost a year out from the wedding). One of the other BMs had been in contact with the MOH and I guess had been helping her, and so Brenna offered this other BM to be Co-MOH. I had received emails a week or two ago that kept saying both of their names, and was confused. Brenna confirmed the status last night in an email and needless to say I was a little upset. Mostly at myself, because heck if all I had to do was reach out within a couple weeks to her MOH offering to help, to be a CoMOH I would have done it in a heartbeat! I didn't anticipate the planning to start out quite so far ahead so now I screwed myself.
So I emailed the two MOHs this morning and expressed how BFF had been my MOH and had done a lot for me, and I hoped when she got engaged that I could do as much as possible to make her pre-wedding events as great as she made mine. I told them I'd love to be as involved as they're willing to let me, and happy to do anything at all for the planning of shower and bach. I tried to be as nice and focused on it's about Brenna and making her time special.
Do you think I did the right thing? I didn't want to step on anyone's toes which is why I didn't reach out sooner, I thought it would be more of a group effort from her BP. I didn't breathe a word of my upset to Brenna of course. I was
then 
for a while last night. I tried talking to DH about it but he doesn't get it so I had to vent to people who would understand and maybe give me some constructive ideas.
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Re: ::Sigh:: Kicking myself (a little long)
I don't think you did anything wrong. I had to make the same decision (pick between friends or sisters) so I went with my SIL. I knew she wouldn't be able to do too much to help out since she was in Texas, so my middle sister did almost everything and didn't feel bad at all that she was listed as the MOH.
I think the other girl overstepped her bounds. It was completely okay, and right, to help out the youngster, but if the girl cared about her friend enough, she would have just let the "rankings" stay the same and help out just as much.
I think you did the right thing too! If you can all work together, it doesn't hurt to have a few extra ideas from someone who's already gotten married!
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I don't think you did anything out of line. I think what the other girl did was kind of pushy. It's always so tricky when you have these "titles", because no matter what you can certainly do as much as you want for your friend, whether you are MOH or BM. My sister was my MOH and she didn't do sh*t to help me. My BM's (all friends) did a ton of things to help me and plan my bachelorette.
She's your friend, and you want to make everything special. I'm sure you can all work together. Don't stress
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April 2010 Siggy Challenge: Next Vacation Destination