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Working for family... Stressed
Just a little rant here. Sorry for the length.
This is probably the hardest thing I have ever done - not that I've had too many jobs. I started working for my dad's company back in November of last year. My whole FAMILY works for him (mom, sister, aunt, myself). It's new and small, so everyone has to do a little of everything. I really love the challenge, and I feel like I'm getting so much exposure to things I otherwise would not. But here's the problem: No one, including myself, is able to separate family from business.
My mother lectures me in the office in front of people. She does that "mmw..." warning. My sister has a major attitude problem and curses at me when she gets mad. No complaints about aunt, she's cool. My dad is the worst (I love him, but I mean separating family vs business). I am worked extremely hard and he has extremely high expectations of my performance - to which I meet. I have become somewhat of a "jack-of-all-trades and master of none" since I started working here. Anyways...
[There is a lot more BG here, so ask if you are curious. I'm leaving it out to save you from a wall-o-text!]
This morning, my dad told me to email someone, by "making up" what his company would have made his e-mail address. They have a standard, and he wanted me to take their standard and guess at his email address. I said that was a bad idea, because it could go to someone else. To which he yelled that "You are less experienced and you don't KNOW as much as I do!"...Okay, so I responded, "I don't think it's a good idea." So he got furious and said he'd do it himself. I tried to respond saying I was going to do it how I thought would be best (emailing another member of the company, requesting said person's e-mail address). He got up out of his chair with this nasty ass look on his face, got in my face pointing at me saying I am inexperienced and all this crap about how I don't know what I'm doing. I ignored him and let the situation diffuse.
About 45 mins later, he gets up out of his chair and walks over to me and snaps at me saying that "You made me get up and do that and now one of our employees saw me." I have HAD it with him treating me like a POS. I refused to let him deflect that blame to me. I told him that NO, I did NOT make him get up and overreact and get in my face, and how dare he accuse me of making him do that. So he responded, "Brush up your resume and find a new job. You cant' work for me."
Anyone else work/have worked with family? Can you offer advice on how to deal with this? I have lost weight from the stress because I have no appetite, I cry almost every day at work, and I cannot maintain a healthy relationship with my dad anymore.
Re: Working for family... Stressed
~Benjamin Franklin
DS dx with celiac disease 5/28/10
Get out. Now. Brush up the resume and find another place where you're treated with respect and not as the child your father seems to think you are. No one deserves to work in that environment.
Does he treat you this poorly at family GTGs? Becuase that's a whole other ball of wax if so.
Our little Irish rose came to us on March 5, 2010
Don't drink the water.
Disclaimer: I am not an MD. Please don't PM me with pregnancy-related questions. Ask your doctor.
I agree.. I have been applying to jobs most of this morning.
Send your resume's out.
I only work for family a few hours each week but there is no way I could do that full time.
I've worked for my mom's company for 16 years. It took us awhile - as in several years - to be able to draw the line between family and work. That being said she still treats me like a daughter sometimes and has given me a mom lecture in the middle of a meeting (she usually does apologize for these when she realizes she's done it). She has very high expectations of my work as well, which I don't mind because it has helped in earning the respect of my co-workers. My sis started working for mom at the same time I did, but it was very clear that the line between family and work could not be drawn between them. My sis was miserable and their disconnect affected everyone in the company.
That all being said, I get your situation, and I would leave. Don't look back, don't think twice. Find that other job. It will be better for everyone involved.