June 2008 Weddings
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BWLO: Second (or, next) Kid Timing....
Just curious:
1. How old is your first.
2. When are you thinking you'll have #2, or your next if you have more than one.
3. What made you decide on that time frame (budget, age, etc).
Re: BWLO: Second (or, next) Kid Timing....
We're thinking we'll maybe start TTC again around Nora's 2nd birthday, so that they will be ~3 years apart.
We want them to be relatively close in age, but don't mind having a few years between them. I think 2-3 years apart is great for siblings, but I am nowhere close to being ready to be pregnant again now, so we're leaning toward the later part of that timeframe. Also, budget is a factor--two in daycare is difficult to imagine right now, especially since we just bought a house.
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Natalie is 20 months old. We are currently TTC and hope to have a baby in June, July, or August (or obviously beyond into fall if it takes us longer) of 2012.
That would make Natalie anywhere between 29-36 months apart from kid #2.
I chose this for a few reasons. I think 2.5 years is a good age gap in general. I feel like we've had a great time with her as "just her," and she'll be old enough to not be so super needy when #2 comes, but also won't be so old that she'll have bad jealousy issues (hopefully.) Obviously we can't guarantee against that, but my personal experiences lead me to believe that it's easier when they're under 3.
The other reason I don't want to wait a really long time is that we might want 3 kids, and I would prefer for Natalie and the youngest to not be extremely far apart. The other reason is that I don't want to be in diaper and potty training hell for the rest of my life, and waiting a really long time to have another would prolong that.
1. 20 months
2. Hoping to have #2 in July or August of 2012 making Neena 30 or 31 months when baby #2 arrives.
3. I don't know. We are just ready! And, 2.5 years seems like a good difference.
Neena Mae. 1/7/10
"A baby nursing at a mother's breast is an undeniable affirmation of our rootedness in nature." - David Suzuki
1. 20 months
2. we are not ready yet, not sure when we will be. We are thinking around 3 years apart would be a good age.
3. A couple things factor in- age for sure. We are both 31 and I am not sure if we want one or two more. If it is 2 more, and we have 3 years between each, that would put me at 35-36 after the last and I am ok with that, but personally I don't want to be much older than that having children.
Also, SD is almost 8. We don't want the age gap to get any larger. DH and I have also never been just us as SD (obviously) has always been in the picture. We don't want to have her finishing high school and be starting with a new baby.
Even with those reasons (which initially made me think we would have them pretty quickly) I just don't feel ready for another yet. Add to that the SD's baby mama drama that just goes on and on and on and it just isn't the right time to be pregnant. Hoping that we can get some of it resolved soon so the timing works out.
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Still thinking and rambling based on your replies.....
Yea, the thought of two in daycare gives me hives. It would be as much as college tuition (and NOT in-state tuition!)
I'd go back to work again but would I do PT again after Jane? Don't know. Jane would still go to daycare while I was home on mat leave b/c her daycare we sign up for a year at a time.
We probably couldn't send both to this same daycare unless I worked FT.....it might actually be cheaper to hire a nanny!.
aaaaaaaaaand now I'm back to thinking having just the one would be just fine - and I really think it would. The only thing is I'd be denying her the sibling relationship and my siblings are my best friends and I'd hate to deny her that.
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Kayleigh right now is 13 months.
Dh wants to TTC #2 in March since Kayleigh will/should be weaned by then but I'd honestly prefer a spring/summer baby so I'd want to start next summer.
I love having my alone time with Kayleigh now and would like to have #2 when K can go to 3-K so #2 and I could have our alone time too.
We haven't really budgeted for #2 yet since it's far off but having me stay home helps with not having to pay for day care.
1. How old is your first.
Liam is 18 months.
2. When are you thinking you'll have #2, or your next if you have more than one.
We are thinking of TTC next Spring/Summer once Liam is 2. We would love to have the kids about 3 years apart.
3. What made you decide on that time frame (budget, age, etc).
Actually, its a combination of everything. Spending the one on one time with Liam, adapting to being a mommy and working FT, budget since daycare costs are outrageous, etc. Honestly, I am still not quite ready to be pregnant again. Liam is currently in the terrible 2's (6 months early!) and it has been a huge challenge. Its exhausting, and throwing pregnancy on top of that at the moment, does not sound ideal! Hoping he grows out of this phase sooner rather than later:)
1. How old is your first. 8 months
2. When are you thinking you'll have #2, or your next if you have more than one. If DH had it his way we would start trying on her 1st birthday. However, I think we'll be waiting until she's about 18 months.
3. What made you decide on that time frame (budget, age, etc). We want our kids to be close in age. We both wish we were closer in age to our siblings. Also, the only paid mat leave I get is whatever sick days I have saved up. I just used all of them to have Molly which is why we want to TRY to get a late spring baby so I can still have a decent mat leave. We also tried this last time and ultimately had a Jan baby. Obviously we'll take a healthy baby whenever we can get one.
1. How old is your first.
Marshall is 14 months old right now, but will be 16 months when Baby K is born.
2. When are you thinking you'll have #2, or your next if you have more than one.
We're not sure if we're going to try for #3 or not. If we decide to it will be when Baby K is at least 2, so they would be more like 3 years apart.
3. What made you decide on that time frame (budget, age, etc).
We had a couple of factors that went into our decision. I really wanted the kids to be close together (Sam would have been ok with them being a little further apart). We also plan on me staying at home (or only working part time in the evening) until the kids get into school. Having the kids closer together means that I will be going back into the full-time work force sooner rather than later.
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1. How old is your first.
Kellen is 2, or 28 months if you want to break it down. Tessa is 9 months. So, they are 19 months apart.
2. When are you thinking you'll have #2, or your next if you have more than one.
I have been adamant about being done since we had Tessa, and DH was finally on board with being done a few months ago. But, now I am wavering on my decision. I know that we have a good dynamic going now, but I love having 2 siblings and DH comes from a family of 5 boys. I just don't know if I am missing having a baby around or if I really want another one. I guess we will see what I think about having another once Tessa is a toddler. It's such a hard decision to make.
3. What made you decide on that time frame (budget, age, etc).
We wanted our kids close in age. We started trying to get pregnant with Tessa when Kellen was 6 months old and found out we were pregnant a couple weeks before he turned 1. We knew we could afford another one since we don't pay for childcare since we work opposite schedules and have lots of family that are generous enough to help us out for free. I am glad they are this close in age because it's a good dynamic, although it's rough sometimes I am hoping they are great friends when they are older.
1. How old is your first.
19 Months.
2. When are you thinking you'll have #2, or your next if you have more than one.
I kept saying I didn't want to be PG on vacation, well we're back and I am SO NOT ready. Perhaps I'll go with when Zac is 2.
3. What made you decide on that time frame (budget, age, etc).
See above
This had a lot to do with our spacing as well. We knew we wanted them close together in age, plus wanted to get through all of those sorts of things at once. Mads is 16 1/2 months now, so they'll be just under 21 months apart once this LO gets here.