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Note: This only affects The Nest's community members and will not affect members on The Bump or The Knot.
Our tech team has launched updates to The Nest today. As a result of these updates, members of the Nest Community will need to change their password in order to continue participating in the community. In addition, The Nest community member's avatars will be replaced with generic default avatars. If you wish to revert to your original avatar, you will need to re-upload it via The Nest.
If you have questions about this, please email help@theknot.com.
Thank you.
Note: This only affects The Nest's community members and will not affect members on The Bump or The Knot.
Clicky Poll: WWYD re: FB status
My divorce will be final today. Part of me wants to post something on FB about it. Nothing too obvious, but maybe something like, "Team MaidenName again!" but part of me thinks it's tacky. I'm just so happy that it's finally over but I'm sure if it was someone on my NewsFeed who wrote that I'd be giving them the side-eye. [Poll]
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Re: Clicky Poll: WWYD re: FB status
Cecilia arrived 12 October 2012
Thanks for the votes. I figured if I would side-eye someone for doing it, then it's probably not the smartest thing to write on FB. Also, I'd hate for potential boyfriends down the road seeing me publicly elated about my divorce.
I'd go for the subtle quote too.
"The secret to a rich life is to have more beginnings than endings"
"Celebrate endings - for they precede new beginnings"
"Courage is the power to let go of the familiar"
"Laugh when you can, apologize when you should, and let go of what you can't change. Life's too short to be anything but happy"
"Life is like riding a bycicle. To keep your balance you must keep moving." - Albert Einstein
"Some of us thinking holding on makes us strong, but sometimes it's letting go." - Herman Hesse
"Sometimes you have to let go to see if there was anything worth holding onto"
"We must be willing to let go of the life we planned, so as to accept the life that is waiting for us." - Joseph Campbell
I like these two, especially the second. I think it celebrates bravery that can be true of a divorce--and I think you have a pretty amazing story of being brave where others would not be able to.
Of course, you could always go with our friends the Dixie Chicks: 'She needs wide open spaces' or Adele 'we could have had it all....' (I jest, I jest!)
Haha, I was thinking of Adele! Too harsh? hehe
"Baby, I have no story to be told,
But I've heard one on you and I'm gonna make your head burn,
Think of me in the depths of your despair,
Making a home down there as mine sure won't be shared"
Oh I really like all of these! Decisions, decisions! Thanks for your help
I wouldn't overthink it. Post whatever you want, it's your freedom! And how many people do you really care what they think?
As I said I would: I am raising my glass in your honor! Red wine, to be exact.
You're right, I just don't want to appear crass. Thanks for the support--cheers!
I'm with the consensus... I'd probably skip a direct FB post. It's not that I think it's 'tacky' per se, it's just I look at FB Status as just a kind of trivial FYI type space-- I don't post particularly personal stuff, but that's me.
At the end of the day, congratulations for finishing what I'm sure was a very tough, emotionally draining episode. I admire your positive approach to moving forward (openness to new relationships, etc). That's really great! Wish you lots of happiness going forward!!
FWIW, I wouldn't side-eye anyone who posted a divorce/split update on Facebook. I'm so sick of telling people one by one, and I kind of resent the general sentiment that you shouldn't post divorce stuff on Facebook.
First, they've done so many studies that show people make their lives look so much better/happier on Facebook than they really are. It's been leading to increased insecurity and depression, since people feel like they have it so much worse than all of their FB friends. Hiding "bad" news is just reinforcing that problem.
Second, it's not bad news to begin with! I'm so much happier since the split, and I think it's silly that social etiquette suggests I keep it to myself. I don't think posting about a divorce should be any more uncouth than posting about a wedding.
Since our divorce will take so long (at least one more full year), when it finally goes through, I will definitely post something on Facebook along the lines of "It's a relief to finally have all the divorce paperwork done at last."
I think the only thing to steer clear of is the angry or spiteful "Good riddance!" kind of sentiment. Or anything publicly deriding the ex. After all, the actual divorce is public record anyway!