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Would you be offended?

I work with this woman who thinks it's her job to tell everybody else what to do. She's bossy to everyone on our team and it pisses us all off.

We had a conversation one day about her live in nanny and how she wants to talk to her about being overweight. I said I thought it would be a horrible idea to bring that up to someone. Anyone that has a weight issue knows it and doesn't need anybody else embarassing them by talking about it. Plus, she's an adult she can make her own health and nutrition decisions without her intervening.

Well, today she comes into work gleaming about how she finally approached her nanny about her weight problem and they're going to do Weight Watchers together. I told her she was out of line even though it was coming from a good place, it's not her place to try and educate a grown adult about what they need to do.

Would you guys be offended if someone approached you about your weight or is that just me?

Re: Would you be offended?

  • I'd definitely be offended if my boss did!
  • Unless it was someone I was incredibly close to and it was out of genuine concern for my health, I would.
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  • It's not just you. Even if it was coming from a good place, she was out of line. It's one thing if it was her husband and he was morbidly obese, but not a nanny. I guess it also depends on how she brought it up. It could be done tactfully like saying,"I would really love to start eating healthier and exercising more. Would you ever be interested in doing WW with me and being my exercise buddy?" But judging from what you said, I doubt that was how it went.
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  • As someone who is overweight I would be offended if my employer said something to me. I'm fully aware of my weight and I don't my employer to say something or offer their advice.
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  • Thanks for validating my thoughts. She justified it by saying she came from a really small town where people didn't take care of themselves so she was uneducated. Um hello, unless you have lived in a cave all your life you know being overweight is unhealthy and there are tons of ways to find out healthier habits, it's called the internet.

    I was just furious for this girl because I've met her and I know she's not the type to speak up for herself when someone offends her.

  • I'd definitely be offended. When I was younger my aunts used to have "talks" with me all the time and it was really upsetting. Finally I snapped one day and told them that when they weren't fat anymore, then they could talk to me about my weight. I was perfectly aware I was overweight and my parents and I were taking steps to deal with it. I didn't need their talks. She was extremely out of line IMO.
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  • I'm torn on this. My boss at my last job suggested we do low carb together and we both lost a bunch of weight. But we were really good friends and talked about everything. I don't see them having that relationship.

    Even when it comes to just friends broaching the subject, this is probably flameful but a lot of depends/depended for me on whether the other person was overweight. If a skinny friend suggested we do WW so she could lose five pounds or whatever when I was at my heaviest, I would have been offended, upset, not receptive, and probably mad. But when my also overweight friend asked me to do it with her together, I was fine with that.

  • I would be offended and probably furious.
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  • I'd be pretty pissed, but I'm also irrationally sensitive about my weight.

     

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  • imageLucille Bluth:

    I'm torn on this. My boss at my last job suggested we do low carb together and we both lost a bunch of weight. But we were really good friends and talked about everything. I don't see them having that relationship.

    Even when it comes to just friends broaching the subject, this is probably flameful but a lot of depends/depended for me on whether the other person was overweight. If a skinny friend suggested we do WW so she could lose five pounds or whatever when I was at my heaviest, I would have been offended, upset, not receptive, and probably mad. But when my also overweight friend asked me to do it with her together, I was fine with that.

    This woman is skinny.
  • I would probably be mortified, as well as offended.  My best friend talked to me about doing Weight Watchers together before she knew that I was PG.  That's totally different than an employer bringing it up though!
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  • Am I the only one wondering about the legal ramifications of talking to your household employee about their weight?

    Yes, I would be horribly offended if anyone took it upon themselves to talk to me about my "being overweight," because that says to me they're concerned about how I look and not my health. If she had said something about her eating habits, lack of exercise, or her effects on the kid/s because of her habits, then maybe. But not from what you said.

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  • imagecakenbake:

    Am I the only one wondering about the legal ramifications of talking to your household employee about their weight?

    Yes, I would be horribly offended if anyone took it upon themselves to talk to me about my "being overweight," because that says to me they're concerned about how I look and not my health. If she had said something about her eating habits, lack of exercise, or her effects on the kid/s because of her habits, then maybe. But not from what you said.

    No, I immediately started googling the legalities of it.

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