North Florida Nesties
Dear Community,
Our tech team has launched updates to The Nest today. As a result of these updates, members of the Nest Community will need to change their password in order to continue participating in the community. In addition, The Nest community member's avatars will be replaced with generic default avatars. If you wish to revert to your original avatar, you will need to re-upload it via The Nest.
If you have questions about this, please email help@theknot.com.
Thank you.
Note: This only affects The Nest's community members and will not affect members on The Bump or The Knot.
Our tech team has launched updates to The Nest today. As a result of these updates, members of the Nest Community will need to change their password in order to continue participating in the community. In addition, The Nest community member's avatars will be replaced with generic default avatars. If you wish to revert to your original avatar, you will need to re-upload it via The Nest.
If you have questions about this, please email help@theknot.com.
Thank you.
Note: This only affects The Nest's community members and will not affect members on The Bump or The Knot.
Holy crap, they're crazy.
WTF? I do have sympathy for this board, but holy hell ladies! I know women on this board have had fertility issues and I can't imagine them ever acting this way. And what's w/all of the ::siggy warnings::?!? Yeah, because that definitely doesn't draw more attention to it. I feel so bad for the obviously scared OP.
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Re: Holy crap, they're crazy.
She had a loss nine months ago. How does that not qualify her to post on a loss board?
I think so! It's a flippin trainwreck. I think maybe you can post, but you can under no circumstances talk about your pregnancy and you must...MUST put ::siggy warning::
What amazes me is how you can go through something like this and have such little compassion. And seriously, (I realize this is going to sounds harsh) you have the right to be heartbroken and to have your moments of wallowing, but stop playing the freakin victim. Lots of us have horrible things that happen to us and don't act like that. You would think dealing with something like this would make you more in touch w/reality, not so far removed from it. How can they not reach out to someone who is clearly scared when I'm sure they can imagine what she's going through. It's just sad.
Also (since they have such a flair for the dramatics) can someone please explain how you can have your ute ripped out three times?! "
"Very VERY carefully. How would you suggest I function after having my ute torn out 3 times?
Tell ya what - you go try it and then come report how you function every day, m'kay sweetie? "
I can't imagine what it must be like to have one loss (let alone three) my heart does break for them, but what a tacky way to word it. No need to say it that way. It's horrible enough on it's own.
I find it incredibly hilarious that the very first person to answer was giving her crap for posting when pregnant, when she herself was as well. WTF?
I'm with all of you. It has got to be one of the worst things to happen, and it is definitely a loss. But don't give someone crap because they're not as miserable as you and are coming to you for help. Sheesh.
"My 101 List - Updating asap, I swear!
From my lurking over the years, yeah... That's how it is. I just do not understand how these women can't be happy for one another. I mean, really? I feel like that's just bad karma.
I just can't fathom not being happy for my friend who had tried so hard to get pregnant. I understand jealousy, but outright banishment & de-friending? That's so selfish.
I find the dynamic on some of those boards ridiculous. All of the rules that people are supposed to follow are absurd. It creates a major disconnect from reality, IMO.
The OP was obviously new with only 2 posts on the Bump. How was she supposed to know which was the "right" board to post on? And when the TTCALers do get PG, they are just expected to leave and go post on PGAL? But they are "welcome" to "check back in" with the TTCALers?
How is it that my BABY is going to be 3?
BFP-2/25/11; 8 Wk U/S-3/25/11-No HB, measured 6.5 wks; D&C
ITA agree with Lucky about your attitude towards it. It was nice to see someone going through it that wasn't a Bitter Betty. & I was SO happy for you when you got pregnant & especially now that you have a beautiful little girl
Totally agree with everything you wrote.
This is why both of you should be respected and admired. I know there's no "right way" to deal with this, but I hope if I was ever in that position I would have the strength and compassion to have this outlook.
What was really blowing my mind was all of the PGAL welcome signs. Ummm....clearly not! Also the," Delete this RIGHHT NOW!!! OMG. What an insensitive cow you must be for not deleting this! You are horrid. Horrid! DIE!" Clearly it never crossed any of their teeny tiny self absorbed minds that perhaps she just hadn't come back on yet.
I agree with this and I wonder how much of that crazy is mob mentality. Or like being mean and bitter -- that's their schtick if that makes sense. I can imagine going to that board and hearing the same things over and over and over again that when something like what OP posted comes along it's easy to just spew what you've been hearing. And then when other people start flaming, it's easy to join the mob.
That was a very disjointed thought. lol
I think some of these people forget that it is a public message board and imposing rules is stupid and I don't see how they think they have any right to tell people what they can/can not post. I was never a big poster on the bump but I did visit the TTTC and infertility board to search for answers to questions I had since no one IRL knew what we were going through. I never posted to these boards due to the rules they seemed to have and the fact that it seemed most of these ladies were going through IVF and I was not. I was honestly afraid that they would not see me as having infertility since I wasn't doing IVF treatments.
I find it ironic that the only way you can really control how other people post on an internet board is by hurting their feelings enough, when post regulations are there to 'protect' the feelings of people already on the board. It's such a groupthink thing in a place that could not be more open and more free.
I can't imagine ever saying to a woman with an ectopic pregnancy, "Well, at least you got pregnant and thanks for rubbing it in my face." Seriously? You can die from an ectopic. You at least will most likely lose the tube. Each pregnancy afterwards increases the risk that it will happen again. That is so scary and extremely serious, and to meet that with mockery is inexcusably hateful.