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feeling silly for feeling guilty

this is ridiculous, i know.  so dh and i have been out a handful of times and left the little man with a sitter (usually family).  not a big deal.  dh has done hhs with friends or gone out for a drink when ds is in bed and i stayed at home with ds.  again, not a big deal. 

but now that i am going to meet my girls out for drinks and a movie after ds is in bed on friday night.  i feel super guilty about it.  i have no idea why.  ugh.  does anyone else feel bad taking time for themselves rather than spending it with the family or dh?  this is so not normal for me.     

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Re: feeling silly for feeling guilty

  • maybe because i am just further out and i'm home with this baby all the time, but i look forward to non-baby related times. i got drunk at a bridal shower with some friends last sunday it was nice. 

    most of my best friends live out of state so i have way way less chances to go out now. 


  • i am looking forward to it.  i just feel bad wanting to get out of the house without ds or dh.  meh, i am sure i will be over it tomorrow when i am out and having a drink with friends. 
    image
  • I have absolutely feel/felt the same way. It's silly but it's not.  I think not being with him while I work makes me more drawn to being at home (whether he's awake or not) when I'm not working. I want to maximize that time. Plus going out requires more planning on my part to make sure things are in order for caretakers, husband or otherwise. We're going away over night and Max boy will transfer from the babysitter to grandmother, two people he spends the most time with, but I'm totally fretting over the whole thing.
  • its normal to feel it and hopefully you will be over it by the time you are out with the girls. i still get the same way after ten years of motherhood so i cant promise it gets easier :(
    David John 4.19.01
    Jonathan Dean 4.5.08
    Anna Capri 5.4.11
  • I must be the worst mom ever.  I don't feel guilty when I go out without her and dh.  I look forward to it.  I miss her while I'm out and sometimes I'm sad when I get home if I didn't get to see her that evening, but not guilty.  I'm going to mom hell.
  • I feel the same way, especially if I know she will be in bed and I won't see her when I get home.  However, almost always, I feel recharged after a few hours out with the girls.  I think it makes me a better mom. 
  • thanks girls! 

    and lando, if mom he!! means being well adjusted enough to look forward to having fun- can you please save me a spot.  i hope to get there one day. 

    image
  • I never feel guilty, but I am home with them all day.  If I worked I am sure I would feel guilty because I would want to spend my free time with them.

    But he will be asleep!  You won't be missing anything!  even if he was awake, you deserve and need that time away

    image
    DS 3.12.08
    DD 7.11.09
    DD 8.01.13
  • I've only been out a handful of times bc I feel like I miss so much when I'm working. But going out when shes sleeping doesn't bother me at all. And I have always felt recharged after I got home.
    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
  • I feel guilty if I go out on weeknights and miss out on seeing Oliver. I do this about 1-2x/month. Afterwards though, i always feel refreshed and more relaxed. It's nice to do things out of the normal routine. 

    I never feel guilty doing things while Oliver is asleep. I usually try to plan things (even running errands to Target on weekends) when he's napping/asleep for the night. 
    Warning No formatter is installed for the format bbhtml
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