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CD
I didn't want to hijack the Monday Random post.
I don't know if you'll take this a negative or positive but I wanted to tell you it took DH 2 years to get over the worst of his mental health issues. We are on a 4 month going well streak which is the longest in 2 years. Before that, it would be a good couple of weeks followed by a bad month or two. I completely understand the rollercoaster ups and downs, it's exhausting and makes you constantly second guess yourself.
For my DH, the first 9 months was really no treatment or diagnosis as well, so you could really say the depression took about 15 months to level out.
Like I said, I don't know if you'll find that reassuring or more depressing. I can tell you now that I think it's over for the most part, I'm really happy I hung in there.
Re: CD
Yeah. That's definitely more depressing.
I found a new counselor so I'm happy about that... But I just don't even know how much I feel like trying anymore.
Poof! TMI is gone.
You have to figure out what YOU want. You have to figure out what you would do even if he changed all the things you wanted him to change, would you still want to be with him? Would him being "perfect" make a difference or would it still not be enough? That's the question my counselor asked that really got me thinking.
I hope that helps. I am in no way advocating for a separation/divorce, trust me, it really sucks, but you have to do what's best for you, no matter what.
This is really interesting & I need to think about that.
Thanks, ladies. I appreciate the support.
LLL, I've actually put a lot of thought into what you said about him being perfect & if that would be enough.... Still haven't made a decision, but that's helping me get there.
When I got home from the gym last night, he pretty much immediately started a fight with me. We fought for a few minutes & I told him I thought we needed a few days apart. So he grabbed his stuff & went to BIL's (so today should be sufficiently awkward now that BIL works here....). I was upset at first, but after that I felt oddly calm. I poured myself a glass of wine, ate cookies for dinner & just let myself relax.
I think I know where I'm headed, but I haven't made a decision yet. Obviously, there's a lot of things to factor.
How is it that my BABY is going to be 3?
BFP-2/25/11; 8 Wk U/S-3/25/11-No HB, measured 6.5 wks; D&C
Y'all.. Don't be sorry for me. Seriously. Don't. I'm doing what it takes to make me happy. Be HAPPY for me, okay?