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WWTND (what would the nest do)
You and your H haven't been talking to MIL going on for 6 weeks. A couple e-mails were exchanged about each other's behavior. You have asked MIL and FIL to sit down and discuss how you can all move ahead with more respect for one another... FIL was willing to but not MIL she was still upset and 'needed more time'. 6 weeks have passed... haven't heard a word from her. FIL and H have discussed the situation and work together so things are okay. FIL called you for your bday. MIL still not talking to either of you. She didn't call you for your bday... your H got sick and she called him yesterday and today to ask how he is. Today your H says well if you can't talk to me all the time don't bother just talking to me some of the time unless you are ready to discuss our e-mails. She says she will never be ready to discuss them cause it upset her too much but BTW this weekend is your father's bday and here is where we are celebrating see you then. Your H says I don't think we are coming cause it's real awkward {intimate family dinner}. MIL disolves into tears stating that he is not the man she raised and not the person she thought he was to want to ruin his father's bday.
All hypothetical of course....
Do you go? or not?!
Re: WWTND (what would the nest do)
The original e-mail was from her was about me not being the nicest of daughter-in-law's. H originally went through FIL to get MIL to talk to us. He said yeah yeah yeah we all will then when it was upon us he said 'she's not ready, needs more time, and is upset you don't accept her for who she is' when OUR point was she doesn't accept us for who we are. I guess she just thought she'd write my husband an e-mail about me and then that'd be it B would tell me to shape up or ship out?
i wouldn't go, I would call your FIL and tell him happy birthday and offer to take him to dinner or have him over. But she needs to grow up! Why cant it just be discussed like adults and move on? She is the one that sat in your driveway and waited for her son to come home b/c she didnt want to talk to you. I'm so glad B is sticking to his guns and on your side.
My MIL isn't talking to Jay and I either, so dont feel too bad. haha
I would go, get sh!tfaced, then cause a fuucking scene.
I would not go and I would have said..
How dare you pin it on the man I am. I am willing to settle our differences and talk about these e-mails..you are not!! Hypothetically of course.
well in that case, hell no- dont go! she's willing to talk to B about you and not too you? high school much? your his WIFE. mommy needs to deal!
This is exactly what I was thinking! I would offer to do something with him to celebrate his birthday, but not put myself in the same room with that woman. If she can't be mature enough to have a conversation with you guys to work it out, I don' t think she is worth the time. I'm glad B is on your side with this. She just seems like she wants to put all blame on you for her shortcomings. Hypothetically, of course
Hell, I'd go and ignore her.
Oh wait...that's what I do at Hubby's family gatherings anyway!
i wouldn't go. i just don't stand for being treated like sh!t. and my husband won't tolerate on my behalf - coming from his half - either. he had to tell his sister that if she puts him in the middle between her and me, he will not choose her. that was enough to make peace for 8 years now.
follow through.
Yup!!!!!
I would go and just ignore her, its for ur FIL not her
I follow my DH;s lead with matters regarding his family. But if I were in your shoes I dont think I would go. Especially seeing the way shes treated you in the past. You are not someone's wipping post, she should accept you for who you are, rather then talk badly about you. End of story!
I think I would still call your fil and wish him a happy bday, it seems like you are somewhat close to him. GL with this