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I know this is stupid, but I'm bummed anyway. (Long)
One of my best friends (since we were 12) recently got engaged. Well, she originally told me that she wasn't going to have bridesmaids, just two MOHs. Today in conversation it came up that her FI wanted to have his friends in the wedding so she asked 3 other friends in NY to be in the wedding in addition to the MOHs (who are both family). It was one of those situations where it came up in conversation and she kind of had to let me know or she would have had to lie to me. I could tell she had been avoiding telling me because she didn't want to hurt my feelings.
While I know it's really stupid, I'm genuinely upset. I'm not mad/upset with her at all, just sad. We've been planning our weddings since we were 12 (she was in mine) and I guess I just always thought I'd be a part of hers. She 100% has a right to not ask me (and she said it's a distance issue with the other 3 girls all being close and living in the area) but I can't help but feel hurt.
I'm sure I'll get over it soon and instead realize that I get to go to NY for the wedding and enjoy myself and have more freedom since I'm not in the actual wedding, but for now I'm going to be sad. I of course didn't say anything to her about it, just that I totally understood, but I'm allowed to mope on my own a bit, right?
Re: I know this is stupid, but I'm bummed anyway. (Long)
This same thing happened to me, so I understand. One of my best friends, who was a bridesmaid in my wedding, moved back home to Pittsburgh while I was engaged. She got engaged the next year and only had local girls be bridesmaids, because she didn't want out of town people to have more expense than they already did. I understood and appreciated the thought, but was still a little bit hurt. She ended up asking me to be a speaker so I could still be involved without having to buy a dress, etc.
So I definitely understand the hurt feelings. Just try to remember that she probably didn't mean anything by it and now you'll have more money to enjoy yourself while you're up there.
I'm definitely looking on the bright side though. I don't have to spend money on a dress that I'll never wear again. Instead I get to buy an awesome dress to show off how skinny I am to all my old friends that I haven't seen in a while, and dance the night away with DH. No drama, just fun.