Trouble in Paradise
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So my cw insulted me the other day

He's actually my superior.

He has a really bad habit of putting his foot in his mouth and he just really pissed me off this week.

In the course of a 20 minute coversation he called me a red neck and said that me and my friends were working class.

Then when I told him I took offense to this, he tried to say these were meant as compliment while throwing sterotype after stereotype at me.

Just really pissed me off

He sent me a fb message apologizing. And, while I think that he's geuinely sorry, I don't think he really gets it as he is one that is very quick to label people.

I told him as much and told him it's an incredibly shallow practice

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Re: So my cw insulted me the other day

  • Please explain how red neck is mean to be a compliment?
    I agree with everything that muddled said. You should listen to her. -ESDReturns
  • Did he actually say "redneck" to you and then try to pass it off as a compliment??

    I'm curious as to how the conversation went, but no matter how he said it, it's douchebaggy and definitely not a compliment. 

    - namaste mothafockaaaas - image
  • I would go to HR, seriously. What a douche.
    image
  • Why would your superior at work FB an apology to you? That's weird. At the very least he could have sent you an actual email.
  • I don't know who that could be taken as a compliment.  Thats like when my co-worker called me a "little line-backer" and then when I got angry insisted that it was meant as a term of endearment.  Men are asshats...at least 99% of them.
    "You cannot protect yourself from sadness without protecting yourself from happiness."
  • imageBeebeeEater:

    I'm curious as to how the conversation went, but no matter how he said it, it's douchebaggy and definitely not a compliment. 

    He, I and another cw were talking about a community event and he said
    "that sounds like something a red neck would do, right lucky?"

    So, I asked what he was implying...he proceeded to dig himself deeper saying that since I'm from the south, I would see that kind of thing and my family must be accustomed to this kind of thing. And then proceeded to ask where "my people" are from. wtf - my people?!?

     I kept asking what he meant by all this and he brought up the time he and his wife came to our house for a cook out and that my friends seemed "working class" all because he remembers one of my friends was a waitress at the time.

    For the life of me I can't figure out why he calls me working class since I know he, I and cw who was witnessing all this all make around the same salary.

    Of course third cw was sitting there image

    Seriously, it's nothing new for him and he's made comments like this before. We've let it slide because he, I and third cw work closely together and usually have a friendly rapport and will crack jokes.

    But after the more direct written response to him via fb, if he so much as makes one more stereotyping comment in my presence directed at me or someone else, I'm going to his superior.

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  • Dude, I would go to HR. That is seriously not cool to be making comments like that.

    Also, you are friends with your superior on FB?!!! Maybe I am just weird (hey, I'm sure I am) but I only friend a coworker or superior after I am no longer working with them. It just seems like a recipe for disaster. Is this a regular practice?

    I'm not flaming you. I just am genuinely surprised. 

    image
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  • Eh, kind of an unusual situation. We were equals for about 3 years until new owners took over and cleaned house. He's been promoted, but the promotion is sort of in title only. He doesn't really do much different (except use his job title as an excuse for doing less actual work)

    He, I and the other person in my department have all hung out, hit the bars together, so I don't sweat it.

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  • Defriend on FB.

    If asked, explain, "It doesn't seem appropriate anymore, does it?"

    Never again engage in a conversation longer than 5 minutes that is not about work and work only.

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